Rosie Green Are our early nights cause for alarm - YOU Magazine Fashion Beauty Celebrity Health Life Relationships Horoscopes Food Interiors Travel Sign in Welcome!Log into your account Forgot your password? Password recovery Recover your password Search Sign in Welcome! Log into your account Forgot your password? Get help Password recovery Recover your password A password will be e-mailed to you. YOU Magazine Fashion Beauty Celebrity Health Life Relationships Horoscopes Food Interiors Travel Home Life Relationships Rosie Green Are our early nights cause for alarm By Rosie Green - June 26, 2022 ‘Can we ask them to leave by 9pm?’ The boyfriend is wondering whether it’s acceptable to ask this of our dinner guests. I tell him that it is possibly (absolutely definitely) not socially acceptable. He sighs and concurs. The boyfriend, you see, is a morning person, a lark. He likes lights out by 10pm and is wide awake at 5am, working on documents by 6am then firing out emails that land before 7am. Image: David Venni I’m similar. I bounce out of bed like Tigger, firing on all cylinders. I have to hold off messaging people pre-6am as I recognise that most normal people are still in REM at that time. I often think I’d be a good person to have in the army, as I’d be cognitively alert in a dawn raid. (Not so good at the other stuff though, like taking orders, fighting or wearing those fatigues ‒ very unflattering on the hips.) But the flipside is that come dusk I’m incapable of stringing a sentence together, let alone having a deep and meaningful conversation. And I’m tetchy, too. At parties I’m like a wind-up toy, absolutely wild until about 9pm. I’m never that person who stays up until the small hours chewing the fat. Nope ‒ I’ve gone to bed and have the earplugs firmly wedged in. It’s different to be in a relationship with someone with the same circadian rhythm as me. We shoot the breeze at the crack of dawn and feel amorous at similar times. My ex was the opposite ‒ a proper night owl. In the evening he would stay up to watch the end of a movie even if it went on way past bedtime. Imagine! Naturally, he would be the last to leave a party. At midnight I would be giving him the nod from a corner of the room – a nonverbal five-minute warning, like the fun police ‒ while he was desperate to stay just that bit longer. This made me, and no doubt him frustrated, as although I wanted to be a party animal, at that hour my body and brain craved sleep like a Love Islander does attention. Back home in bed I would be begging him to turn out the lights while he wanted to get to the end of his chapter. Our differing body clocks were not conducive to sex, as he would be up for it when I was exhausted and vice versa. There were other friction points. Nothing would wake him in the early hours. Not storms. Not neighbours’ parties. Not noises that could possibly be intruders (but were, in fact, the wind). And not crying babies (his own). I was often wide awake at 6am, thinking of all the jobs we/he needed to do. Then, when he opened his eyes a few hours later (which may or may not have been triggered by an ‘accidental’ loud noise… ahem), I would have a to-do list of ‘actions’ ready for him. Is it any wonder that our relationship didn’t go the distance? Which makes me wonder how much impact your circadian rhythm might have on the success of your relationship. While it’s good that my boyfriend and I are matching, we have to be careful as there’s no counterbalance to our mutual early-bird tendencies. If we don’t watch it we’ll end up eating dinner at the same time as toddlers, or prisoners, or going to bed before it’s dark. We could find ourselves turning down invitations if the start time is too late. And yes, imposing unreasonable curfews on our guests. We could end up friendless. It’s a real concern. So, on that front, how about you come round for dinner? Is 5pm OK? @lifesrosie Read more of Rosie Green’s columns here RELATED ARTICLESMORE FROM AUTHOR Rosie Green Will this be the winter of our discontent Rosie Green Want to find true love Follow your nose Rosie Green I have a love rival – his phone DON' T MISS Fiona Bruce Sometimes I struggle not to cry November 14, 2021 17 beautiful 2021 diaries to help you to look forward to December 4, 2020 Why women leave men for women What’ s fuelling the rise of April 28, 2019 Hollywood veteran Laura Linney on plastic surgery friendship and her stellar July 3, 2017 You can shop the khaki jumpsuit from Holly Willoughby’ s new M& S July 17, 2019 The secrets and lies behind this happy family photo April 11, 2021 It’ s cocktail hour Olly Smith’ s cocktail recipes and Eleanor Maidment s canapé November 14, 2021 BBC One has revealed its Christmas TV schedule and there’ s lots December 2, 2020 YOU Beauty Box August Reviews August 1, 2017 Rome has been named the cheapest major city to visit in August 7, 2019 Popular CategoriesFood2704Life2496Fashion2240Beauty1738Celebrity1261Interiors684 Sign up for YOUMail Thanks for subscribing Please check your email to confirm (If you don't see the email, check the spam box) Fashion Beauty Celebrity Life Food Privacy & Cookies T&C Copyright 2022 - YOU Magazine. All Rights Reserved