After Being Married For 20 Years This Man Shares His Tips Bored Panda Bored Panda works better on our iPhone app Continue in app Continue in browser Like what you're reading? Subscribe to our top stories Please enter email address By submitting email you agree to get Bored Panda newsletter. We respect your privacy. We will not publish or share your email address in any way. Almost finished... To complete the subscription process, please click the link in the email we just sent you. Almost finished... To complete the subscription process, please click the link in the email we just sent you. Are you leaving already? Are you sure you want to post this? We're asking people to rethink comments that seem similar to others that have been reported or downvoted this warning is a mistake x x Let's fight boredom together! Continue with Facebook Continue with Google or Log In Don't have an account? Sign Up Forgot your password? Creating an account means you agree with Bored Panda's Terms of Service 0, text: error()"> Become a member Sign Up Have an account? Login Forgot your password? Creating an account means you agree with Bored Panda's Terms of Service 0, text: error(), css: errorCssClass"> Password reminder Please provide your email address and we will send your password shortly. Send Have an account? Login Don't have an account? Sign Up Get our top 10 stories in your inbox: Finish 0, text: error(), css: errorCssClass"> Please enter your email to complete registration Finish 0, text: error(), css: errorCssClass"> Activate to continue Your account is not active. We have sent an email to the address you provided with an activation link. Check your inbox, and click on the link to activate your account. I have already activated my account Resend activation link We and our trusted partners use technology such as cookies on our site to personalize content and ads, provide social media features, and analyze our traffic. You can read more about it and change your preferences here. Agree Bored Panda iOS App Available on App Store Continue in App Bored Panda Android App Available on Google Play Continue in App By using our services you agree to our use of cookies to improve your visit. You can change your preferences here. Agree BoredPanda Login Add Post Search ArtPhotographyAnimalsFunnyTravelIllustrationComicsDIYGood NewsParentingChallengeAsk Pandas More Featured Trending Latest Newsletter The Bored Panda iOS app is live! Fight boredom with iPhones and iPads here. Bored Panda “ Making Love Will Become An Issue” Man Explains What He Has Learned From 20 Years Of Marriage In 10 Bullet Points Home Partnership Advertise Success stories Jobs About us Contact 216points 1.7K Occasions, People1 year ago

“ Making Love Will Become An Issue” Man Explains What He Has Learned From 20 Years Of Marriage In 10 Bullet Points

Robertas Lisickis
BoredPanda staff As it was already mentioned in another Bored Panda article on what happens when parents have stronger emotional bonds with their kids than their spouses: relationships are hard. But, as it is with many things in life, it's not impossible. Work on it, and you're golden. Imgur user that1guy15 recently celebrated 20 years of marriage, and decided to share the ten things he learned from living together with his wife for so long with the internet-the "tips I have learned the hard way on how to build a strong and meaningful marriage." More Info: Imgur

Marriage is hard sure but working on it-together-can do wonders

Image credits: Wendy Berry So, Imgur user that1guy15 recently went to the social image sharing platform to share that he is now a 20-year veteran in marriage-congrats, dude!-expressing his surprise how he had lasted this long in what he called a crazy fun ride. To celebrate this, he decided to share 10 lessons that he had learned over these two decades on marriage, namely on how to build and maintain a strong and meaningful marriage.

So this husband celebrated his 20 years of happy marriage by sharing a list of lessons he learned over the years

Image credits: that1guy15 In this set of rules, he covered things like effective communication, conflict resolution, trust, sex, among a number of other things, providing a certain reality check along the way. In particular, the lessons focused on things like marriage being a team effort (emphasis on effort) and not a competition between two individuals; how communication is key and nobody's a mind reader; and how hard work, trust, and acceptance are essential in building and maintaining a healthy marriage. Image credits: that1guy15 It's been a day since the list of lessons hit the internet, and it has thus far managed to garner over 66,000 views with over 5,200 upvotes and around 520 comments. This prompted a number of people in the Imgur community to share some of their stories and rules. Many agreed with this list, praising that they couldn't have said it better themselves. Image credits: that1guy15 People who have been married for anywhere between 10 and 40 years stressed how communication is key. Some also pointed out that though teamwork is important, forgetting the individual isn't an option either-so why not turn individual goals into a team effort?

People loved the thread and some also shared their own lessons with the Imgur community

Others offered never forcing solutions, and to not forget to give some issues time. There was also one user who reminded people that, whenever you're in an argument, don't forget that you will remain together in the end. Of course, there was the obligatory "keep your mouth shut" comment, but it was in light of being angry, so as to not say anything stupid. After all, you can't take those words back. What are your thoughts on this? Do you have some advice on how to properly adult in a marriage? Let us know in the comment section below! Anyone can write on Bored Panda. Start writing! Follow Bored Panda on Google News! Follow us on Flipboard.com/@boredpanda! Share on Facebook Robertas Lisickis Follow Unfollow Robertas Lisickis Author, BoredPanda staff Robertas, nicknamed the Comma Inquisitor by friends, is a Bored Panda writer and content creator. After his studies at LCC International University, where he got a BA in English Language and Literature, Robertas went on to do freelance teaching, translation, and copywriting work, primarily specializing in IT. He spent nearly three years writing about all things Wi-Fi, eventually being picked up by Bored Panda. Whenever there’s free time, he spends it playing Gwent, or hosting Dungeons & Dragons sessions for his mostly chaotic neutral team. Read more » Get the latest inspiring stories via our awesome iOS app! Download Bored Panda app! 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POST Dr Nostromo Dr Nostromo Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago Wife and I have been together 44 years and probably the most important thing that's made us so successful, and is strangely missing from the list, is to make each other laugh every day. You can still do that after 40 years, you can get through anything. 35 35points reply Anita Pickle Anita Pickle Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago Shared humor is amazing. It brings you closer together, it gets through the worst, it makes the good times even better. Yes, laughter is so important. Just thoroughly enjoying each other 10 10points reply Load More Replies... Bron Bron Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago My husband had such a miserable childhood he didn’t laugh, ever. But has amazing one liners that crack me up. Our relationship has grown so much in the past 3 years (because we had time to really talk about our relationship), and he now laughs. Not “rolling on the ground, tears pouring down my face, can’t breathe laughing like I do, but he’s getting there. 5 5points reply Slune Slune Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago 100 upvotes! I have so many lines from laughing after 40+ years, don't regret one.....And don't forget to support each other .... 4 4points reply Zophra Zophra Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago (edited) IDK - 30 years here - we have totally different senses of humor. We rarely make each other laugh, but I still think we have a solid relationship. I would say fight politely and if you both are "givers" it sure helps. 4 4points reply Aliquid A Aliquid A Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago Unless she starts laughing AT you, rather than with you ;) 2 2points reply Susan Stead Susan Stead Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago I think there's a glaring omission here: take a cold, hard, dispassionate look at your future partner before even considering marriage. I know, it's not romantic, but it has to be done. If you don't agree on life-impacting topics, such as financial goals, having kids, relations with each other's families, politics, etc., you're in for a lot of anguish. Before we got married, my husband and I discussed the terms of our divorce. I told him point-blank "no beating, no cheating." We agreed that this is a non-negotiable, once-and-done marriage killer. If either of us hits the other or cheats, then that's it--no counseling, no second chance, just divorce court. Love DOES NOT conquer all. Giving someone a pass to behave badly just because you love them is deadly. Again, it's not romantic, but I truly believe the idea that love conquers all is a myth. Love is why you're in the marriage, but it doesn't make problems go away. 24 24points reply Ozacoter Ozacoter Community Member • points posts comments upvotes 1 year ago Absolutely! Also talk before becoming more serious about life goals like marriage and children. If you must have kids or never want to get married (or whatever) this should be discussed before things get too serious 5 5points reply Load More Replies... Susan Stead Susan Stead Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago Thank you! Love doesn't fix that. If you don't want kids and someone is dead-set on having them, loving your partner with all your heart won't make you a willing or loving parent. The same goes if you want to save and achieve certain financial goals, but your partner empties the bank account by the next payday, you will fight, and probably wind up splitting up anyway. Get those things resolved out front! 4 4points reply David Brown David Brown Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago My wife was having a couple of health issues, Hashimoto disease which is a thyroid disorder, and the thyroid regulates a lot of stuff such as hormones. For over two years we battled her unbelievable mood swings, going from depression and anxiety to anger and every emotion in between. She hit me on a few occasions, each time it got easier for her to do it, and harder for me to forgive her. I knew this was a health issue, and I loved and supported her the entire way through it. Take into consideration that there may be something else going on if the behavior is out of character. We needed blood tests and medicine, not a divorce attorney. We'll have been married 20 years in 2 months. 0 0points reply Anita Pickle Anita Pickle Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago Love does not cheat or beat. When people think they are in love or thinks that someone loves them and this is happening it is not real love. 0 0points reply Hazel M Hazel M Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago You just summed up my first marriage in a single paragraph Added top tip: "we'll see" or "when we're in a position to" is not a yes or even a maybe, it's a coward's way of saying "no, but I know it's something you want that I'm not going to allow" 0 0points reply Glirpy Glirpy Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago By beating I thought you meant something else until I kept reading. LOL 0 0points reply Beezel Palomar Beezel Palomar Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago Sure, just ONE marriage and he's ready to give out advice. 23 23points reply SoozeeQ SoozeeQ Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago "Marriage is one of the few things where we consider someone an expert if they've only successfully done it once". https://www.boredpanda.com/shower-thoughts-on-marriage-life/ 19 19points reply Load More Replies... Glirpy Glirpy Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago Along with having a kid. 1 1point reply Stephanie IV Stephanie IV Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago Hihi 3 3points reply Sonya Jersey Sonya Jersey Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago hahahaha the nerve 0 0points reply Load More Comments POST Dr Nostromo Dr Nostromo Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago Wife and I have been together 44 years and probably the most important thing that's made us so successful, and is strangely missing from the list, is to make each other laugh every day. You can still do that after 40 years, you can get through anything. 35 35points reply Anita Pickle Anita Pickle Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago Shared humor is amazing. It brings you closer together, it gets through the worst, it makes the good times even better. Yes, laughter is so important. Just thoroughly enjoying each other 10 10points reply Load More Replies... Bron Bron Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago My husband had such a miserable childhood he didn’t laugh, ever. But has amazing one liners that crack me up. Our relationship has grown so much in the past 3 years (because we had time to really talk about our relationship), and he now laughs. Not “rolling on the ground, tears pouring down my face, can’t breathe laughing like I do, but he’s getting there. 5 5points reply Slune Slune Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago 100 upvotes! I have so many lines from laughing after 40+ years, don't regret one.....And don't forget to support each other .... 4 4points reply Zophra Zophra Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago (edited) IDK - 30 years here - we have totally different senses of humor. We rarely make each other laugh, but I still think we have a solid relationship. I would say fight politely and if you both are "givers" it sure helps. 4 4points reply Aliquid A Aliquid A Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago Unless she starts laughing AT you, rather than with you ;) 2 2points reply Susan Stead Susan Stead Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago I think there's a glaring omission here: take a cold, hard, dispassionate look at your future partner before even considering marriage. I know, it's not romantic, but it has to be done. If you don't agree on life-impacting topics, such as financial goals, having kids, relations with each other's families, politics, etc., you're in for a lot of anguish. Before we got married, my husband and I discussed the terms of our divorce. I told him point-blank "no beating, no cheating." We agreed that this is a non-negotiable, once-and-done marriage killer. If either of us hits the other or cheats, then that's it--no counseling, no second chance, just divorce court. Love DOES NOT conquer all. Giving someone a pass to behave badly just because you love them is deadly. Again, it's not romantic, but I truly believe the idea that love conquers all is a myth. Love is why you're in the marriage, but it doesn't make problems go away. 24 24points reply Ozacoter Ozacoter Community Member • points posts comments upvotes 1 year ago Absolutely! Also talk before becoming more serious about life goals like marriage and children. If you must have kids or never want to get married (or whatever) this should be discussed before things get too serious 5 5points reply Load More Replies... Susan Stead Susan Stead Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago Thank you! Love doesn't fix that. If you don't want kids and someone is dead-set on having them, loving your partner with all your heart won't make you a willing or loving parent. The same goes if you want to save and achieve certain financial goals, but your partner empties the bank account by the next payday, you will fight, and probably wind up splitting up anyway. Get those things resolved out front! 4 4points reply David Brown David Brown Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago My wife was having a couple of health issues, Hashimoto disease which is a thyroid disorder, and the thyroid regulates a lot of stuff such as hormones. For over two years we battled her unbelievable mood swings, going from depression and anxiety to anger and every emotion in between. She hit me on a few occasions, each time it got easier for her to do it, and harder for me to forgive her. I knew this was a health issue, and I loved and supported her the entire way through it. Take into consideration that there may be something else going on if the behavior is out of character. We needed blood tests and medicine, not a divorce attorney. We'll have been married 20 years in 2 months. 0 0points reply Anita Pickle Anita Pickle Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago Love does not cheat or beat. When people think they are in love or thinks that someone loves them and this is happening it is not real love. 0 0points reply Hazel M Hazel M Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago You just summed up my first marriage in a single paragraph Added top tip: "we'll see" or "when we're in a position to" is not a yes or even a maybe, it's a coward's way of saying "no, but I know it's something you want that I'm not going to allow" 0 0points reply Glirpy Glirpy Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago By beating I thought you meant something else until I kept reading. LOL 0 0points reply Beezel Palomar Beezel Palomar Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago Sure, just ONE marriage and he's ready to give out advice. 23 23points reply SoozeeQ SoozeeQ Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago "Marriage is one of the few things where we consider someone an expert if they've only successfully done it once". https://www.boredpanda.com/shower-thoughts-on-marriage-life/ 19 19points reply Load More Replies... Glirpy Glirpy Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago Along with having a kid. 1 1point reply Stephanie IV Stephanie IV Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago Hihi 3 3points reply Sonya Jersey Sonya Jersey Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago hahahaha the nerve 0 0points reply Load More Comments Popular on Bored Panda I Used AI To See What These 23 Popular Cartoon Characters Would Look Like In Real Life 30 Y.O. 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