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Woman Asks People Online If She’ s Wrong For Telling Her Husband She Won’ t Cook For His Grieving Friend Again

Robertas Lisickis and
Lukas Garnelis
Helping a friend, or even a friend's friend, is always respectable. Not only does it restore faith in humanity, but also is actually helping an individual get through a tough situation that they could have otherwise not been able to deal with on their own. However, one thing that most people don't really expect, and hence end up stuck in most times, is when this friend starts taking things too far, either becoming a choosy beggar, moocher, or a straight-up jerk. It's a point where you refusing to help will make you look like the bad guy, but continuing to help the guy in need just fuels their abuse of your help. Well, this one Reddit user ended up in such a situation, which led to her asking the trusty r/AmITheA-Hole community to help understand if she's wrong here. More Info: Reddit

Helping someone out in time of need by preparing a meal or two is great if they don t get too comfortable with it

Image credits: Farhad Ibrahimzade (not the actual photo) Meet u/Lillian3435543, or for convenience's sake, Lillian, who recently came to the AITA subreddit with a story of help for a husband's friend that quickly turned sour. So, the Reddit user has a husband who has a very good friend named Dale. Dale had recently lost his wife to cancer and to help him out during this rough time, Lillian started including him in the meals she cooks. This way he would at least have one less thing to worry about.

This Reddit user shared a story of how a grieving friend of her husband grew ever so demanding with her help over a span of 3 months

Image credits: Lillian3435543 Long story short, what started off as one meal a week quickly turned into 3 to 5 meals a week with specific requests and preferences. The cherry on top was that Dale wasn't even paying for any of it. The husband said Dale had no job, so it would have been rude to demand payment for it. On top of it all, Dale would send Lillian messages thanking her for the food, but he would also begin sending in comments on how to 'improve' her cooking. You probably already know where this is going. Image credits: Lillian3435543 Well, it all piled up and exploded a few days ago when Lillian, who's a nurse at a big hospital, was working a full day and Dale sent in a request to prepare some food for him and several guests he had coming over later that day. Because of work, she never got around to reading it, let alone responding. When she got off work and came home, her husband was upset. Turns out, Dale texted her early in the morning and, having not received any response from her, ended up ordering food last minute. Apparently, that ended up making him feel ignored and like a burden, leading to a comment that, in his opinion, Lillian is working too much, and the hubby pointed out that she should apologize for putting Dale into this awkward position. Image credits: Lillian3435543 What followed was her strict refusal to continue cooking for Dale ever again: "I told [my husband] that I'm no longer cooking for his friend. Not even weekly meals. Period. Since this is the type of treatment I get and I'm being treated like a maid or a personal cook then I'm not cooking for Dale again. Ever. I said this, then I went upstairs." The story ended up being posted on r/AmITheA-Hole, asking the community whether she was actually in the wrong here to refuse to cook for Dale for what is now three months, and whether she should have apologized.

So she went to ask Reddit if she was in the wrong here and they unanimously determined that no she s not wrong

The post blew up, garnering nearly 20,000 upvotes with over 2,000 comments in under two days. People determined that she is in fact not the bad guy here, but rather Dale, or even more so the husband. You can check out the full thread along with everyone's detailed verdicts here. But before you go, why not drop us a comment of who you would side with in this situation and why in the comment section below! Anyone can write on Bored Panda. Start writing! Follow Bored Panda on Google News! Follow us on Flipboard.com/@boredpanda! Share on Facebook Robertas Lisickis Follow Unfollow Robertas Lisickis Writer, BoredPanda staff Robertas, nicknamed the Comma Inquisitor by friends, is a Bored Panda writer and content creator. After his studies at LCC International University, where he got a BA in English Language and Literature, Robertas went on to do freelance teaching, translation, and copywriting work, primarily specializing in IT. He spent nearly three years writing about all things Wi-Fi, eventually being picked up by Bored Panda. Whenever there’s free time, he spends it playing Gwent, or hosting Dungeons & Dragons sessions for his mostly chaotic neutral team. Read more » Lukas Garnelis Follow Unfollow Lukas Garnelis Author, Community member Lukas is a photo editor at Bored Panda. 4th year in Vilnius Gediminas Technical University as a graphic designer. Can do whatever he sets his mind to. Read more » Show All Contributors Get the latest inspiring stories via our awesome iOS app! Download Bored Panda app! 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I could understand "my husband isn't a very good cook", but husband doesn't cook? Why the heck not? 82 82points reply MiriPanda MiriPanda Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago (edited) She said 'My husband.... takes care of household chores except cooking' so I think the splitting of tasks is just fine here. The friend should learn to cook though. 31 31points reply Load More Replies... Ozacoter Ozacoter Community Member • points posts comments upvotes 1 year ago That would be fine except that he demanded that his wife cooked for his friend. If he knew how to cook she would tell him to do it. 9 9points reply LuckyL LuckyL Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago Still, doesn't cook sounds a lot like "not at all". I'd want a husband who is able to do the cooking if needed and not lean back on "ohh, but I don't know how" 6 6points reply CP CP Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago You can split tasks and still be able to cook when it is necessary. 5 5points reply Kristin Maine Kristin Maine Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 8 months ago No, it's really not just fine. There's no excuse for anyone who's capable of learning and reaching the stove to not know how to cook. He's gonna do what, if something happens to her? Certainly not rely on Dale. Every grown adult who is physically and mentally capable should learn to cook. That's called basic life skills. Hell, even kids old enough to learn, should. You can't always count on having the means for takeout or someone to cook for you. 0 0points reply Dave P Dave P Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago I learned to cook at 10. But I mean they offer courses for older bachelors in how to cook basic foods. This guy is selfish a-hole and this woman needs to re-evaluate her marriage, maybe go to counciling so someone can put through her husbands thick skull what he is doing to her 13 13points reply Kathryn Baylis Kathryn Baylis Community Member • points posts comments upvotes 1 year ago If Dale was able to go into enough detail about how his wife made certain dishes to suggest his friend’s wife make them the same way, then Dale knows a helluva lot more about cooking than he’s letting on, and is just being lazy. Yeah, time to cut Dale loose, and to let her husband know he’s on thin ice himself, for backing up Dale’s laziness. Plus, since hubby supposedly does all the housework but cooking, does that mean he was going over to clean Dale’s house everyday too? I highly doubt it. In fact, I’m pretty sure either Dale never asked him to, or he told Dale to f**k off with that request the first time he made it. So he should back his wife up when she says enough is enough, Dale can cook for himself from now on. 10 10points reply anarkzie anarkzie Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago These days you can find step by step videos on YouTube, so you don't even need to go to the effort of taking a course. 10 10points reply Sorican Sorican Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago or get a few meal kits, complete with the instructions. 4 4points reply Dave P Dave P Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago true, but if you are coming from literal nothing a hands on teacher does help 2 2points reply Misty Tree Misty Tree Community Member • points posts comments upvotes 1 year ago Even my "burned water once" partner can make a pot of spaghetti. All the excuses being offered are ridiculous. 6 6points reply Sorican Sorican Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago I knew a woman who had managed to burn PBJ sandwiches twice. The first time she laid it on a stove-top griddle that she didn't know was being preheated. The second time, she decided she rather liked it, uh, toasted. (for the record toasting sliced bread for PBJs- butter and pan, not a toaster- *is* better. if it's not too much work.) 3 3points reply Kathryn Baylis Kathryn Baylis Community Member • points posts comments upvotes 1 year ago Or just toasting the bread in a toaster BEFORE adding the peanut butter and jelly. (That’s jam to all you Brits out there. We do NOT put Jell-O—-what you call jelly—-on PB&Js.) 4 4points reply ChickyChicky ChickyChicky Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago I'm getting the feeling there's some cultural aspects here that we don't know about. 4 4points reply TheReader19 TheReader19 Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago I felt this as well, however; as a nurse I know how sh**** work can be and I'm not cooking for anyone's friend. 23 23points reply Aunt Messy Aunt Messy Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago My husband is a fantastic cook - because he thinks of it as fun. I've been cooking dinner every night since I was 9 years old. It's just another job to me. 2 2points reply Sara G Sara G Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago Been there, done that, never will again. 1 1point reply Diane Knight Diane Knight Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago My husband is actually a better cook than I am. When we were first married I worked the 2nd shift, so if he was to eat, he had to prepare his own. He made enough for the both of us and I'd eat the dinner when I got off work after 12:30 am. My question would be " Does hubby starve until 9:30-10 pm, does wifey make a meal before she left for work at 11:00 am?" Some things in this story leave gaps. Also, he must do some cooking, or how would he know to give 'advise' to improve her meals. Her husband expected her to apologize to Dale, nope, hubby should tell Dale " I'm sorry for you for not getting others to give ya cooking lessons since your wife's passing, here are some community classes you can sign up for." After 3 months, he can break it off and go forward alone. Others do. 1 1point reply Kanuli Kanuli Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago We split kitchen work 50/50, depending on dishes. Complicated stuff one prepares, one cooks. Simple dishes, one cooks, one cleans. My wife and I are brutal honest whenever possible, and early in our relationship she claimed she couldn’t cook either, and I was like, you can cook, you might not want to. (Plus she can bake really well anyway) But she got the point fast, and has some signature dishes nowadays too which taste amazing. If one doesn’t feel like cooking, np. But don’t claim something stupid as excuse. You can follow a list of instructions? So you can cook. Sorry for saying some stuff twice ;) 0 0points reply Leo Domitrix Leo Domitrix Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago Mine doesn't b/c, in his own words, he "sucks" at it. He managed to ruin oatmeal once. 0 0points reply Charlotte A. Charlotte A. Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago I managed to set the fire alarm off when making omelette. One mistake isn't reason enough to stop trying. 30 30points reply Kathryn Baylis Kathryn Baylis Community Member • points posts comments upvotes 1 year ago (edited) Hey, in my life, I have let the water boil away when I forgot I was boiling eggs. TWICE. Did you know they actually burn and explode? And, man, do they fly far! However, that hasn’t deterred me from cooking, including boiling eggs (I usually do keep a good eye on them—-both of the times I mentioned were the result of having to tend to an emergency and forgetting they were on the stove). When at first you don’t succeed; try, try, again. 6 6points reply Charlotte A. Charlotte A. Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago Did that too.... well they got browned and cracked. They never flew... :) 2 2points reply Kathryn Baylis Kathryn Baylis Community Member • points posts comments upvotes 1 year ago Check all the crevices and inaccessible places around where they exploded. You just might find a surprise piece of petrified burnt egg in an unexpected place. 1 1point reply Sorican Sorican Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago but in some parts of the world, the oil in the pan is supposed to be smoking, when making an omelette. (Thailand, and i assume most of asia, the pan should be exceedingly hot. It results in a crispy-edged omellete with a still fluffy-inside. It's delicious... even if your not making, a thai omelette, strictly speaking.) 1 1point reply Charlotte A. Charlotte A. Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago My omelette was black, though ;) 0 0points reply Leo Domitrix Leo Domitrix Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago This comment is hidden. Click here to view. Do you want a list of all he ruined? there's not enough space here... I can start with the oatmeal, go through scrambled eggs... -5 -5points reply Charlotte A. Charlotte A. Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago :) I'll just take your word for it, then! 1 1point reply Mewton’s Third Paw Mewton’s Third Paw Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago Wow. At some point it’s an intelligence thing. Not being able to make fancy meals is one thing but not being able to follow simple instructions is an intelligence thing. That isn’t a major turn off? 6 6points reply Renske de Jonge Renske de Jonge Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago This comment is hidden. Click here to view. So a woman who can't drill a hole in the wall or fix the car or a flat tire is also dumb? -14 -14points reply Myrkur Myrkur Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago That's not something you need to do every day in order to survive. Those things are still a good thing to learn (for both women and men), but it's not really the same as cooking for yourself 16 16points reply Kathryn Baylis Kathryn Baylis Community Member • points posts comments upvotes 1 year ago (edited) Not just every day—-at least 2-3 times a day! As opposed to once in a great while to “drill a hole in a wall or fix the car or a flat tire”. Or hell, even the weekly—-and seasonal—-grass cutting. Apples and oranges, Renske, do not a valid argument make. 6 6points reply Renske de Jonge Renske de Jonge Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago (edited) Old men 80 plus can't cook and their wives can't do the finances, cause one did this and the other did that. Who cares? Doesn't make them stupid. They just don't need to. Fixing a flat tire is needed to survive if you don't have a car. In this case they have to learn though. That's just lazy and taking advantage of her. -3 -3points reply Kathryn Baylis Kathryn Baylis Community Member • points posts comments upvotes 1 year ago (edited) When I was single, I either learned how to do things like that myself, or found reliable repair people and paid them to do it for me. When I got married, and we were splitting chores, my husband, who can cook—-and helps with the cleaning too, btw—-told me I didn’t have to worry about that anymore, because he’d take over those responsibilities if I’d take over the finances. Satisfactory split, so I accepted. We’ve been married 20 years, and so far it’s worked out just fine. But if he wasn’t here, I’d go back to taking care of them myself, like I used to. 4 4points reply Flip Flip Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago That's fine and other women like to cook for their men and he likes to fix her tire. Let them. As long as they don't take advantage, I see no problem with it. Absurd to call Leo's man dumb, just cause he doesn't have to learn to cook. The widower is a spoiled jerk though, who takes advantage of this woman, just like her man. 0 0points reply йЫ щЪё йЫ щЪё Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago I don't let my husband cook just because he is very slow and not very good at it. I love cooking for us, and he does other house chores. I hate when women criticize men for not cooking without knowing a whole story. -3 -3points reply Renske de Jonge Renske de Jonge Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago (edited) This comment is hidden. Click here to view. When they let their men do the 'men tasks' they're hypocrit. Of course you can't cook if there's no need to and your partner loves to do it. -4 -4points reply StrawberryParfait StrawberryParfait Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago Number one, a grown man should know how to cook. Period. There is no excuse for a man not knowing how to cook for himself in this day and age. Helplessness is not an attractive trait, and no woman wants to play mommy to a grown man. Number two, ingratitude gets old fast. All Dale needed to say was "thank you" for the times she chose to cook for him out of the goodness of her heart. Number three, she needs to divorce her asshole husband who seems to think that she is a rent-a-serf for his low-value and lazy friends. He does NOT have her back, clearly values his idiot friend over her, and seems to view his wife as an appliance put there to make life easier for him and his gross friend. If Dale is this much of a petulant child with his friend's wife, I can only imagine how he treated his own. No wonder she got cancer and died. She's probably glad to finally be free of his lazy ass. 57 57points reply LuckyL LuckyL Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago I wanted to upvote until I read the last sentences. 55 55points reply Load More Replies... Bored Silly Bored Silly Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago Me too. It was harsh uninformed and showed immaturity. 7 7points reply Lanie Lanie Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago Yep, two of them. :( 3 3points reply IlovemydogShilo IlovemydogShilo Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago Me too. There are much better ways to want to free yourself from someone than get cancer and die. I think of one of my mother's friends who died of cancer last year. She left behind a husband and 3 teenage children. The husband was not only able to cook for himself but them as well and do all the household chores. This Dale guy needs to act his age and become the responsible adult he's supposed to be instead of the spoilt entitled bratty child he's acting like. 0 0points reply miss miss miss miss Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago You are a horrible person 7 7points reply Derek Clark Derek Clark Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago What the..? You don't get cancer from not being treated right by your spouse. 1 1point reply Kristin Maine Kristin Maine Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 8 months ago But you do tend to die from it if you don't have time to take care of yourself because you're too busy taking care of a petulant, lazy man baby who neither works nor takes basic care of the needs in his life. I can't imagine he treated her any different than he's treating the OP. 0 0points reply Stille20 Stille20 Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago If this is true I am concerned about the marriage more than the friend. The husband and friends could learn to to cook. Also as they are both benefiting from the money she is making, there is no way they should be judging how much she works. Run and take your income and cooking skills with you 50 50points reply Sorican Sorican Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago I think I would have replied back to Dale with, 'And I didn't know we were married.'. and when the husband got pissy about that, 'Well, guess we won't be for long, huh?' making requests and providing instructions on how-to was pretty over the line. But 'you work too much' is a 'me or him, buddy' kind of moment. 7 7points reply Load More Replies... Load More Comments POST YupItsMe1234 YupItsMe1234 Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago It is so weird to hear "my husband doesn't cook". I could understand "my husband isn't a very good cook", but husband doesn't cook? Why the heck not? 82 82points reply MiriPanda MiriPanda Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago (edited) She said 'My husband.... takes care of household chores except cooking' so I think the splitting of tasks is just fine here. The friend should learn to cook though. 31 31points reply Load More Replies... Ozacoter Ozacoter Community Member • points posts comments upvotes 1 year ago That would be fine except that he demanded that his wife cooked for his friend. If he knew how to cook she would tell him to do it. 9 9points reply LuckyL LuckyL Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago Still, doesn't cook sounds a lot like "not at all". I'd want a husband who is able to do the cooking if needed and not lean back on "ohh, but I don't know how" 6 6points reply CP CP Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago You can split tasks and still be able to cook when it is necessary. 5 5points reply Kristin Maine Kristin Maine Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 8 months ago No, it's really not just fine. There's no excuse for anyone who's capable of learning and reaching the stove to not know how to cook. He's gonna do what, if something happens to her? Certainly not rely on Dale. Every grown adult who is physically and mentally capable should learn to cook. That's called basic life skills. Hell, even kids old enough to learn, should. You can't always count on having the means for takeout or someone to cook for you. 0 0points reply Dave P Dave P Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago I learned to cook at 10. But I mean they offer courses for older bachelors in how to cook basic foods. This guy is selfish a-hole and this woman needs to re-evaluate her marriage, maybe go to counciling so someone can put through her husbands thick skull what he is doing to her 13 13points reply Kathryn Baylis Kathryn Baylis Community Member • points posts comments upvotes 1 year ago If Dale was able to go into enough detail about how his wife made certain dishes to suggest his friend’s wife make them the same way, then Dale knows a helluva lot more about cooking than he’s letting on, and is just being lazy. Yeah, time to cut Dale loose, and to let her husband know he’s on thin ice himself, for backing up Dale’s laziness. Plus, since hubby supposedly does all the housework but cooking, does that mean he was going over to clean Dale’s house everyday too? I highly doubt it. In fact, I’m pretty sure either Dale never asked him to, or he told Dale to f**k off with that request the first time he made it. So he should back his wife up when she says enough is enough, Dale can cook for himself from now on. 10 10points reply anarkzie anarkzie Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago These days you can find step by step videos on YouTube, so you don't even need to go to the effort of taking a course. 10 10points reply Sorican Sorican Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago or get a few meal kits, complete with the instructions. 4 4points reply Dave P Dave P Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago true, but if you are coming from literal nothing a hands on teacher does help 2 2points reply Misty Tree Misty Tree Community Member • points posts comments upvotes 1 year ago Even my "burned water once" partner can make a pot of spaghetti. All the excuses being offered are ridiculous. 6 6points reply Sorican Sorican Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago I knew a woman who had managed to burn PBJ sandwiches twice. The first time she laid it on a stove-top griddle that she didn't know was being preheated. The second time, she decided she rather liked it, uh, toasted. (for the record toasting sliced bread for PBJs- butter and pan, not a toaster- *is* better. if it's not too much work.) 3 3points reply Kathryn Baylis Kathryn Baylis Community Member • points posts comments upvotes 1 year ago Or just toasting the bread in a toaster BEFORE adding the peanut butter and jelly. (That’s jam to all you Brits out there. We do NOT put Jell-O—-what you call jelly—-on PB&Js.) 4 4points reply ChickyChicky ChickyChicky Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago I'm getting the feeling there's some cultural aspects here that we don't know about. 4 4points reply TheReader19 TheReader19 Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago I felt this as well, however; as a nurse I know how sh**** work can be and I'm not cooking for anyone's friend. 23 23points reply Aunt Messy Aunt Messy Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago My husband is a fantastic cook - because he thinks of it as fun. I've been cooking dinner every night since I was 9 years old. It's just another job to me. 2 2points reply Sara G Sara G Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago Been there, done that, never will again. 1 1point reply Diane Knight Diane Knight Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago My husband is actually a better cook than I am. When we were first married I worked the 2nd shift, so if he was to eat, he had to prepare his own. He made enough for the both of us and I'd eat the dinner when I got off work after 12:30 am. My question would be " Does hubby starve until 9:30-10 pm, does wifey make a meal before she left for work at 11:00 am?" Some things in this story leave gaps. Also, he must do some cooking, or how would he know to give 'advise' to improve her meals. Her husband expected her to apologize to Dale, nope, hubby should tell Dale " I'm sorry for you for not getting others to give ya cooking lessons since your wife's passing, here are some community classes you can sign up for." After 3 months, he can break it off and go forward alone. Others do. 1 1point reply Kanuli Kanuli Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago We split kitchen work 50/50, depending on dishes. Complicated stuff one prepares, one cooks. Simple dishes, one cooks, one cleans. My wife and I are brutal honest whenever possible, and early in our relationship she claimed she couldn’t cook either, and I was like, you can cook, you might not want to. (Plus she can bake really well anyway) But she got the point fast, and has some signature dishes nowadays too which taste amazing. If one doesn’t feel like cooking, np. But don’t claim something stupid as excuse. You can follow a list of instructions? So you can cook. Sorry for saying some stuff twice ;) 0 0points reply Leo Domitrix Leo Domitrix Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago Mine doesn't b/c, in his own words, he "sucks" at it. He managed to ruin oatmeal once. 0 0points reply Charlotte A. Charlotte A. Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago I managed to set the fire alarm off when making omelette. One mistake isn't reason enough to stop trying. 30 30points reply Kathryn Baylis Kathryn Baylis Community Member • points posts comments upvotes 1 year ago (edited) Hey, in my life, I have let the water boil away when I forgot I was boiling eggs. TWICE. Did you know they actually burn and explode? And, man, do they fly far! However, that hasn’t deterred me from cooking, including boiling eggs (I usually do keep a good eye on them—-both of the times I mentioned were the result of having to tend to an emergency and forgetting they were on the stove). When at first you don’t succeed; try, try, again. 6 6points reply Charlotte A. Charlotte A. Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago Did that too.... well they got browned and cracked. They never flew... :) 2 2points reply Kathryn Baylis Kathryn Baylis Community Member • points posts comments upvotes 1 year ago Check all the crevices and inaccessible places around where they exploded. You just might find a surprise piece of petrified burnt egg in an unexpected place. 1 1point reply Sorican Sorican Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago but in some parts of the world, the oil in the pan is supposed to be smoking, when making an omelette. (Thailand, and i assume most of asia, the pan should be exceedingly hot. It results in a crispy-edged omellete with a still fluffy-inside. It's delicious... even if your not making, a thai omelette, strictly speaking.) 1 1point reply Charlotte A. Charlotte A. Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago My omelette was black, though ;) 0 0points reply Leo Domitrix Leo Domitrix Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago This comment is hidden. Click here to view. Do you want a list of all he ruined? there's not enough space here... I can start with the oatmeal, go through scrambled eggs... -5 -5points reply Charlotte A. Charlotte A. Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago :) I'll just take your word for it, then! 1 1point reply Mewton’s Third Paw Mewton’s Third Paw Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago Wow. At some point it’s an intelligence thing. Not being able to make fancy meals is one thing but not being able to follow simple instructions is an intelligence thing. That isn’t a major turn off? 6 6points reply Renske de Jonge Renske de Jonge Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago This comment is hidden. Click here to view. So a woman who can't drill a hole in the wall or fix the car or a flat tire is also dumb? -14 -14points reply Myrkur Myrkur Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago That's not something you need to do every day in order to survive. Those things are still a good thing to learn (for both women and men), but it's not really the same as cooking for yourself 16 16points reply Kathryn Baylis Kathryn Baylis Community Member • points posts comments upvotes 1 year ago (edited) Not just every day—-at least 2-3 times a day! As opposed to once in a great while to “drill a hole in a wall or fix the car or a flat tire”. Or hell, even the weekly—-and seasonal—-grass cutting. Apples and oranges, Renske, do not a valid argument make. 6 6points reply Renske de Jonge Renske de Jonge Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago (edited) Old men 80 plus can't cook and their wives can't do the finances, cause one did this and the other did that. Who cares? Doesn't make them stupid. They just don't need to. Fixing a flat tire is needed to survive if you don't have a car. In this case they have to learn though. That's just lazy and taking advantage of her. -3 -3points reply Kathryn Baylis Kathryn Baylis Community Member • points posts comments upvotes 1 year ago (edited) When I was single, I either learned how to do things like that myself, or found reliable repair people and paid them to do it for me. When I got married, and we were splitting chores, my husband, who can cook—-and helps with the cleaning too, btw—-told me I didn’t have to worry about that anymore, because he’d take over those responsibilities if I’d take over the finances. Satisfactory split, so I accepted. We’ve been married 20 years, and so far it’s worked out just fine. But if he wasn’t here, I’d go back to taking care of them myself, like I used to. 4 4points reply Flip Flip Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago That's fine and other women like to cook for their men and he likes to fix her tire. Let them. As long as they don't take advantage, I see no problem with it. Absurd to call Leo's man dumb, just cause he doesn't have to learn to cook. The widower is a spoiled jerk though, who takes advantage of this woman, just like her man. 0 0points reply йЫ щЪё йЫ щЪё Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago I don't let my husband cook just because he is very slow and not very good at it. I love cooking for us, and he does other house chores. I hate when women criticize men for not cooking without knowing a whole story. -3 -3points reply Renske de Jonge Renske de Jonge Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago (edited) This comment is hidden. Click here to view. When they let their men do the 'men tasks' they're hypocrit. Of course you can't cook if there's no need to and your partner loves to do it. -4 -4points reply StrawberryParfait StrawberryParfait Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago Number one, a grown man should know how to cook. Period. There is no excuse for a man not knowing how to cook for himself in this day and age. Helplessness is not an attractive trait, and no woman wants to play mommy to a grown man. Number two, ingratitude gets old fast. All Dale needed to say was "thank you" for the times she chose to cook for him out of the goodness of her heart. Number three, she needs to divorce her asshole husband who seems to think that she is a rent-a-serf for his low-value and lazy friends. He does NOT have her back, clearly values his idiot friend over her, and seems to view his wife as an appliance put there to make life easier for him and his gross friend. If Dale is this much of a petulant child with his friend's wife, I can only imagine how he treated his own. No wonder she got cancer and died. She's probably glad to finally be free of his lazy ass. 57 57points reply LuckyL LuckyL Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago I wanted to upvote until I read the last sentences. 55 55points reply Load More Replies... Bored Silly Bored Silly Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago Me too. It was harsh uninformed and showed immaturity. 7 7points reply Lanie Lanie Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago Yep, two of them. :( 3 3points reply IlovemydogShilo IlovemydogShilo Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago Me too. There are much better ways to want to free yourself from someone than get cancer and die. I think of one of my mother's friends who died of cancer last year. She left behind a husband and 3 teenage children. The husband was not only able to cook for himself but them as well and do all the household chores. This Dale guy needs to act his age and become the responsible adult he's supposed to be instead of the spoilt entitled bratty child he's acting like. 0 0points reply miss miss miss miss Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago You are a horrible person 7 7points reply Derek Clark Derek Clark Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago What the..? You don't get cancer from not being treated right by your spouse. 1 1point reply Kristin Maine Kristin Maine Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 8 months ago But you do tend to die from it if you don't have time to take care of yourself because you're too busy taking care of a petulant, lazy man baby who neither works nor takes basic care of the needs in his life. I can't imagine he treated her any different than he's treating the OP. 0 0points reply Stille20 Stille20 Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago If this is true I am concerned about the marriage more than the friend. The husband and friends could learn to to cook. Also as they are both benefiting from the money she is making, there is no way they should be judging how much she works. Run and take your income and cooking skills with you 50 50points reply Sorican Sorican Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago I think I would have replied back to Dale with, 'And I didn't know we were married.'. and when the husband got pissy about that, 'Well, guess we won't be for long, huh?' making requests and providing instructions on how-to was pretty over the line. But 'you work too much' is a 'me or him, buddy' kind of moment. 7 7points reply Load More Replies... 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