Hey Pandas What s The One Lesson You Wish Your Parents Taught You As A Child? Closed
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Community member Publish Not your original work? Add source As we grow older we become exposed to so many different parenting styles, and the more we get to know them the more we see adequacies and/or inadequacies. What are yours? This post may include affiliate links. #1 That being just yourself is enough and you don't need to please everyone around you. Also that firm "NO" is not being rude or harsh but just caring about your mental and physical self. Report Final score: 44points Manndy Fisher POST FearReaper FearReaper Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago Im trying to learn that, but its hard... 4 4points reply View More Replies... View more comments #2 That taking breaks, relaxing, and having fun are an important part of self-care. My parents are incredibly hard workers and would work past the breaking point, leading them to be stressed and irritable. I know it was to give my sisters and I good opportunities, so I am thankful. I wish, however, that they would realize that relaxing and having fun is OK and something they need to do to sustain themselves. To this day, my partner still needs to remind me to take breaks. Report Final score: 33points Emmaline Yuzu POST Sara Marie Sara Marie Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago Agreed! 2 2points reply #3 It is 100% ok to say no to something. If someone needs a ride and you don't feel like it? You can say no. Don't want to go out tonight? Say no. No one is obligating you to do something you don't want to. Report Final score: 31points Rockstar POST Sarah Sarah Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago Yes, this. I was taught instead to be accommodating to everyone. Guess what skill I didn't have, then, when boys started pressuring me to have sex? Right. 3 3points reply View More Replies... View more comments #4 YOU CAN CHANGE YOUR MIND ABOUT THINGS.
ITS NOT ILLEGAL TO TELL YOUR FAMILY ONE THING THAT YOU THINK AND THEN CHANGE YOUR MIND
I struggled with this with my sexuality/gender, i told my parents i was bi, then i was like oh shoot i think im a lesbian. and i thought i couldn't tell them because i already came out.
REMEMBER THAT, IT"S OKAY TO CHANGE Report Final score: 26points -logansucrose- (he/him) POST Tracy Sellars Tracy Sellars Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago I wouldn't say you are changing your mind about your sexuality rather you are discovering who you truly are. 8 8points reply View More Replies... View more comments #5 You can learn as much (if not more) from your failures than your successes.
Never be afraid to try because you might fail.
from building relationships to rebuilding an engine, I use this advice daily. Report Final score: 23points David Scholl POST Jill Tremblay Jill Tremblay Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago Good one ! 2 2points reply #6 To not handle stress the way they did. My mom would explode in anger. My dad would repress. Neither one is healthy, and I do both. I developed anxiety and depression when I started puberty and am still dealing with both more than 40 years later, and still struggling with healthy coping mechanisms. Report Final score: 21points Nikki Sevven POST Jill Tremblay Jill Tremblay Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago The trouble with this is...... No one really knows the "correct" way to handle stress and EVERY single person on earth is going to handle it differently. You can have internal stress that you don't even realize you have only to end up with a panic attack and major anxiety. Talk to people, admit your anxiety and try to read and learn from MANY MANY people. Do what is best for you. 2 2points reply View more comments #7 My parents often thought that if they didn’t tell me about something that they didn’t think would be a problem, then it wouldn’t apply to me.
The one that has affected me most significantly is Financial management: living within my means, bills, debts, credit, taxes, credit scores, savings, emergency funds and budgeting… in turn that converted to being stuck in bad situations, abusive relationships, horrible jobs and endangering myself in various ways trying to numb the pain.
Money conversations were off limits and I spent my 20’s being anxious, severely in debt and ashamed that I didn’t know better. I was completely clueless and constantly stuck and couldn’t talk to them about it because they didn’t understand.
10 years (and about £100k in interest/fees later) I live debt free and frugally with the conscious aim of always having an exit plan and enough money to support the privilege of a life with options. Report Final score: 19points Beakatron5000 POST Kathy L Kathy L Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago Congrats for turning it around! You've cleaned your family roots of this issue. 2 2points reply View more comments #8 How to save money. Perhaps more important thing, knowing how to spend it wisely. Report Final score: 18points Speedgoat POST Miss Frankfurter Miss Frankfurter Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago This! 3 3points reply View more comments #9 That they, nor you, are perfect and this is okay. Report Final score: 17points Mina POST #10 That smoking turns you into a slave to nicotine to the point where you’ll do any disgusting thing to get a hit. It is just as bad as any other drug n I’ve been addicted for about 40 years now. I showed my kid aged seven or eight at the time me making roll ups from the butts in my ashtray n told her this is the real “glamour” of smoking. I’m proud to say she never started. She’s nigh on 32 now, so looks like I got that right! Report Final score: 16points Rai Grant POST Manndy Fisher Manndy Fisher Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago Yes, I can 100% relate to that. And well done to you for teaching her a good lesson. I hope I will succeed in that too. 3 3points reply View more comments #11 That it's OK to just be me...and that I don't need to be like everyone else. Report Final score: 16points Missmic POST Helen Haley Helen Haley Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago I wish my mom had done this a little less. Do you know how hard it is when you don't fit in anywhere? 0 0points reply View More Replies... View more comments #12 I wish my mom would have thought me more about adult life and what to expect from it. I learned at a very young age to take care of myself, but I always wished I knew more about how the world worked. Report Final score: 14points Aelita Senvaitytė POST Jill Tremblay Jill Tremblay Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago No one really knows how the world works. Thankfully there is the internet for you know to learn anything you want to. 0 0points reply #13 Posture. They told me to sit up straight, but just left it as "it looks bad" or even just "because we said so"
If someone had told me "Hey, if you slouch and have bad posture, when you get into your 40s and 50s, you will have nearly crippling pain from arthritis and other issues that it will cause", then MAYBE I would have listened, and avoided some of this... Report Final score: 14points George Mhyre POST Eventually Eventually Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago I have scoliosis, and I think I need to learn this. I'm 17, and I just have trouble thinking so far ahead. Do you have any advice? 1 1point reply #14 It isn’t a lesson, but I wished they would’ve stopped me from over eating/forcing me to eat healthy. I now suffer from false body dysmorphia, and have finally been seeing loss in weight after years of over eating. Report Final score: 13points Chef Latte POST #15 A better understanding of ADHD! Report Final score: 9points GqIce POST #16 Anger management. Report Final score: 9points Sarah Barker POST Caro Caro Caro Caro Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago Lots of people underestimate this. 1 1point reply #17 How to manage and express your emotions in a healthy way Report Final score: 9points Fei POST Helen Haley Helen Haley Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago They probably didn't know. 2 2points reply #18 That is ok to fail. I was identified as gifted/talented in 2nd grade & spent the rest of my school years with the expectation that I'd succeed at everything without really trying. When I lost interest in school they treated me like a pariah & in adulthood I've struggled with perfectionism as a result. Report Final score: 9points SlothyK8 POST Leigh C. Leigh C. Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago I wasn't a "gifted" student but I was considered talented in art, in general, just because I loved to draw and was good for my age. Not a pariah. But the pedestal I was placed on did nothing for my art education. I was expected to have prior understanding of proportioning, light/dark ratios and value, how shapes are pretty much the only thing that matters. As an adult I took a hiatus from picking up a pencil to sketch. If I forced myself I couldn't do anything but scribble and lost any motivation in pursuing a career in art, as I had wanted to growing up. I became lost and living in survival mode. I've just gotten back into art this year and finding I need to learn the basics I should've been taught in school. 1 1point reply #19 Sex education, how it works, how to be safe and healthy etc. Report Final score: 9points Billie POST #20 How to manage money! My parents never gave us an allowance. I know that not every kid gets that...but with my son, we paid him small amounts to help us with chores that were outside his regular list. As a result, not only did he learn that you can get what you want later if you are willing to sacrifice now...but that a good days work can make all the difference in how much faster you can get to your goal. Report Final score: 8points Carol Emory POST Helen Haley Helen Haley Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago This isn't strictly true. 1 1point reply View more comments #21 How to speak the language that half of my family speaks all the time. Some extended relatives don’t even speak english! Now I have to learn myself and it’s so much harder. Report Final score: 8points Eventually POST Caro Caro Caro Caro Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago This. My dutch parents in Aussie forgot to teach us dutch. It was hard when we moved to the Netherlands at first. 1 1point reply View more comments #22 That it is not ok to put other people down, no matter how different from you they are. Report Final score: 8points Marianne Saiso POST Ana.V. Ana.V. Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago This! 0 0points reply #23 i wish they had told me that it's ok to have some standards or expectations in relationships.
I have been told that should be grateful if anyone ever wants to spend time with me, since I'm "so difficult" and just "an intense person".
It's probably right, I think I am indeed too intense and somewhat hard to be around.
But still.
When I was with my first boyfriend, I never said no to anything. "Why would he still want to spend time with me, of I don't do what he likes?" is what i thought back than. I avoid relationships now since that didn't work out too well.
If anything bothers me, I don't dare to talk about it. So my friendships tend to be exhausting for me and than they fail. "why would they want to spend time with me if i complain?" is what i think now.
I can't seem to find a way out of this. Report Final score: 8points royal_antelope POST S S Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago I, too, am an intense person. There are people out there who are good people of substance, who would be a good partner for you. I recommend three things: 1) Be friends first. If you just jump into a relationship without being friends first, of course you will seem like "a lot to handle". But if you are friends first, you build a relationship where they get to know who you are and how you function slowly. 2) Understand you can be a lot and find ways to spread out your 'a lot-ness'. Have multiple people that you go to for support. Your partner is a huge part of your life, but they should not be ALL of it. 3) Check out a therapist. If that's too expensive, write in a private blog or journal. Also - your intensity is a gift. There are plenty of people who appreciate and cherish people like you and me. Just realize that like any skill, it requires practice and honing to master and use positively and intentionally (think of like any super hero's origin story and how they start off.). :) 1 1point reply #24 I’m a twin. My sister was the perfect kid: straight A student, popular, outgoing, well-adjusted, beautiful. I was always in her shadow. I still am. I wish they would have taught me that success, beauty, and quirks have many faces. I still struggle with self esteem and it created a wedge between us for a long time but we’re in a better place now. Never put your kids against each other, especially twins. I wish they would have taught me just because I’m not like her, doesn’t mean I’m a failure. Report Final score: 8points alex cosgrove POST Improperplays Improperplays Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago But. You are :) 1 1point reply #25 I wish my parents explained to me that private colleges cost (a lot!) more than state schools. It's embarrassing to admit now, but I had no idea. No one told me! To their credit, they didn't go to college so they probably didn't know either. I grew up in a pretty poor area, the high school didn't have college prep counselors or anything, so I found this out the hard way. Report Final score: 6points John C POST Jill Tremblay Jill Tremblay Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago I'm just curious how you found this out "the hard way". Did you attend a private college for a year and THEN get the bill? It doesn't usually work that way..... 0 0points reply View More Replies... View more comments #26 That I am enough and deserve respect. Report Final score: 6points Marilynn Berry POST Kaleb Kaleb Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago True 0 0points reply #27 How to tie my own shoes. People make so much fun of me and my velcro strap shoes!!!!!!! Report Final score: 5points Thorfin Wolfsbane POST Terilee Bruyere Terilee Bruyere Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago I don't know why that was downvoted. There are occupational therapy tools (try Fun and Function) that can help you learn to tie your shoes. There are also bungie laces available that don't have that velcro look to them. 2 2points reply View more comments #28 That not speaking about things doesn't mean they're not happening. Report Final score: 5points ThoughtsAreNotFacts POST Jill Tremblay Jill Tremblay Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago This goes against the Laws of Attraction. -1 -1point reply #29 I wish my parents had taught me money and time management. Report Final score: 5points Vanessa Wanner POST #30 That it's a much greater feeling when people notice how smart, lovely, talented, or funny you are...without you telling them. Report Final score: 5points thewickedwest POST #31 What to do, how to react, when I told them I was bullied at school. My mother just said I should ignore it. And how to defend myself against sexual abuse. There were two times when I was abuse by friends of the family. My father doesn't know of it. My mother does and she does nothing. Report Final score: 5points Maren Gärtner POST PixxelDust PixxelDust Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago So horrible! PLEASE tell someone. Preferably the police. Worst case scenario they can't find any evidence and you continue as normal. PLEASE DO NOT STAY SILENT! IT'S THE WORST POSSIBLE MOVE~ 3 3points reply See Also on Bored Panda Woman Shows How "Harry Potter" Characters Were Supposed To Look According To Book Descriptions (35 Pics) 50 ‘Weird Facts’ About The World That Might Give You A Fresh Perspective #32 IQ and Emotional Intelligence are neither related nor interchangeable. Report Final score: 5points Bob Stuart POST #33 This simple sentence: "I'll think about it".
That one simple sentence has increased my savings more than anything else over the years. Whenever I'm tempted to buy an item on impulse in a shop or feeling pressured by the assistant, I just tell them (or myself) 'I'll think about it. 9 out of 10 times I won't go back because I don't really need that item, and money saved is as good as money earned. Report Final score: 5points Zoe Ming POST Leigh C. Leigh C. Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago I like to tell myself "It's nice to look at. That's it. I don't need it in my place to collect dust and look at every day." 0 0points reply #34 Making mistakes is okay. You don't need to be perfect and you don't need to give your 100% at all time if it means you will get burn out and not be able to give at all.
Perfectionism has ruined and paralyzed my life over the years, and I'm just having to unlearn it and stop overthinking and just do it and take risks sometimes... Report Final score: 5points Bethany Lingle POST #35 That everyone becomes either more or less attractive as you get to know them. Remember which you category you'd want to be in. Report Final score: 4points thewickedwest POST #36 Kindness. Both of my parents came from rather harsh upbringings. There wasn't a lot of kindness Report Final score: 4points Judy Durante POST Ana.V. Ana.V. Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago I can feel you 1 1point reply #37 I wish I had been taught to budget, delay gratification, to avoid alcohol, save for retirement, be emotionally stronger. Now that I'm "older" I accept responsibility to learn and live these things, but it would have been so much easier to learn these things as a teenager or younger. Report Final score: 3points Glowdaddy POST John C John C Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago but WOULD you have learned them from your parents' lectures? many have to make their own mistakes to really learn these lessons. don't beat yourself up too bad 2 2points reply View More Replies... View more comments #38 Humanity is f****d Report Final score: 3points badboyhalo POST #39 Where the tape measure is and to use it to measure my bra size every so often. I got sent to the hospital because my bra was too tight and I was bleeding. If you think “omg how did I not notice!” It’s because it was a fairly old bra I hadn’t worn in a while but I thought it still fit. Now I measure myself like every day. Report Final score: 3points Happi doggi (all pronouns) POST Leigh C. Leigh C. Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago Omg. 3 3points reply #40 To think for yourself, and question beliefs, do your own research...then they wouldn't have joined that cult... Report Final score: 3points H Moore POST Kaleb Kaleb Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago Damn 0 0points reply #41 Accept yourself Report Final score: 3points Unknownperson POST See Also on Bored Panda Overworked Employee Quits Because He Wasn't Getting A Fair Wage, Costs The Company $40 Million 40 Embarrassing Moments People Didn't Know Who They Were Talking To And Made A Fool Of Themselves #42 That you don’t need a degree to be successful and to follow what you’re passionate in life Report Final score: 3points Kat Sotiriou POST #43 To be unafraid. Don't be afraid of going out of your comfort zone...to travel, to try new things. My mother was over-protective and afraid of everything. Don't go here because it's not safe. Don't do that because you'll fail. I wish they had pushed me to be braver. Report Final score: 3points Bookmaiden POST PixxelDust PixxelDust Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago Worse if your parents shove you off to soccer training when you're literally having a panic attack and tell you you'll feel better afterwards. (spoiler: I spent another 2 hours still having the panic attack after) 0 0points reply #44 that you're not the center of the universe. you're not a little god, or king. and that you should become financiary independant before starting any consideration about yourself. Live into the real life, then you'll maybe be allowed to place a judgement Report Final score: 2points jpaul POST #45 I wish I was taught more about gender and sexual orientation. sure, my parents are accepting bu Report Final score: 2points alex he/him POST Shrek Bunny (Submission author) Shrek Bunny Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago Oops it got cut off- I meant to say my parents are accepting, but I never really was told about any of that. I learned it on my own. 2 2points reply #46 To not take s**t from anyone including yourself or them. Report Final score: 2points JagJenCon POST #47 Ambition and drive. I wish my parents had pushed me harder and made me strive and plan ahead. I don't blame them for anything but I wish my dad especially had been more involved and I wish mum had pushed back when I didn't try hard enough. Report Final score: 2points Go fuck yourself POST #48 I wish they'd taught me how to keep a secret or be discreet.... I was a bit always like that anyway, even before i became an intel analyist.... but it does still piss me off a bit that both my mum and dad thrive off gossip and neither can keep anything to them f****n' selves for longer than it takes to dial their mates and gossip. Report Final score: 2points GenericPanda09 POST #49 How to prepare for college and get into an actual career. None of my parents went to college. I don't even know where to start on how to pay for tuition, or where to go to get some sort of experience. Report Final score: 2points MyOpinionHasBeenServed POST #50 How to manage money. Wise spending, budgeting, savings, tithing, how to use a credit card, this list goes on. Report Final score: 2points BeagGraineag POST #51 How to deal with money. Report Final score: 2points Vihra Stancheva POST See Also on Bored Panda 30 Of The Most Hectic Homes As Shared On 'The Broke Agent' Instagram Account Bride Doesn't Include Wedding Dinner Price In Her Wedding Invites, Is Surprised To See Many Guests Canceling On Her After They Find Out #52 That real parents try the best they can, and sometimes the get disappointments that could take Report Final score: 1point Diphylleia Grayi POST #53 Clean your teeth!
I was never taught how important oral hygiene was.
I did with my own kids telling them if they neglected their chompers, they would end up with the tombstones I have. Report Final score: 1point Jon Jobling POST #54 "No matter how hard you try nor how much you believe in yourself, you will fail and hurt anyway because life is hell and people are demons." Report Final score: 1point Ryan Deschanel POST PixxelDust PixxelDust Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago someone finally understands. 1 1point reply #55 Studying. I was basically labelled as 'gifted' and cruised through primary skill. I am now stuck in an extension program in high school with little study skill and zero motivation. Thanks mum. Report Final score: 1point PixxelDust POST PixxelDust (Submission author) PixxelDust Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago School, not skill*** 0 0points reply Anyone can write on Bored Panda. Start writing! Follow Bored Panda on Google News! Follow us on Flipboard.com/@boredpanda! Add Your Answer! Not your original work? Add source Publish Change image Upload Photo Ooops! Your image is too large, maximum file size is 8 MB. Upload Upload Edit Image Error occurred when generating embed. Please check link and try again. Render conversation
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Title Update Yuki Li Follow Unfollow Yuki Li Author, Community member This lazy panda forgot to write something about itself. Read more » Aelita Senvaitytė Aelita Senvaitytė Moderator, BoredPanda staff Aelita is an Editor for Bored Panda. She makes sure all the articles are well done and fun to read!She enjoys all things creative, like drawing, playing guitar, and writing fantasy stories. On lazier days you can find her playing video games or binging a TV show. Read more » Show All Contributors Get the latest inspiring stories via our awesome iOS app! Download Bored Panda app! 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Woman Takes DNA Test For Fun Only To Discover Her Long-Term Boyfriend Is Her Full Sibling "I Just Said Thank You And Left": Man’s Nice Gesture Is Praised After Pizza Hut Driver Got A $20 Tip On A $938 Order Leave a comment POST Black Karen Black Karen Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago That I matter. 1 1point reply Keeker Dee Keeker Dee Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago How to make friends 1 1point reply Viviane Viviane Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago A colleague from a family of 10 children told me that his parents only had time to ensure that their children were fed and clothed. He knew little when he moved out on his own. I said, "In other words, you had to raise yourself all over again." "Yup". 1 1point reply Load More Comments POST Black Karen Black Karen Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago That I matter. 1 1point reply Keeker Dee Keeker Dee Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago How to make friends 1 1point reply Viviane Viviane Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago A colleague from a family of 10 children told me that his parents only had time to ensure that their children were fed and clothed. He knew little when he moved out on his own. I said, "In other words, you had to raise yourself all over again." "Yup". 1 1point reply Load More Comments Popular on Bored Panda I Used AI To See What These 23 Popular Cartoon Characters Would Look Like In Real Life 30 Y.O. 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Hey Pandas What’ s The One Lesson You Wish Your Parents Taught You As A Child Closed
4Kviews Yuki LiCommunity member Publish Not your original work? Add source As we grow older we become exposed to so many different parenting styles, and the more we get to know them the more we see adequacies and/or inadequacies. What are yours? This post may include affiliate links. #1 That being just yourself is enough and you don't need to please everyone around you. Also that firm "NO" is not being rude or harsh but just caring about your mental and physical self. Report Final score: 44points Manndy Fisher POST FearReaper FearReaper Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago Im trying to learn that, but its hard... 4 4points reply View More Replies... View more comments #2 That taking breaks, relaxing, and having fun are an important part of self-care. My parents are incredibly hard workers and would work past the breaking point, leading them to be stressed and irritable. I know it was to give my sisters and I good opportunities, so I am thankful. I wish, however, that they would realize that relaxing and having fun is OK and something they need to do to sustain themselves. To this day, my partner still needs to remind me to take breaks. Report Final score: 33points Emmaline Yuzu POST Sara Marie Sara Marie Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago Agreed! 2 2points reply #3 It is 100% ok to say no to something. If someone needs a ride and you don't feel like it? You can say no. Don't want to go out tonight? Say no. No one is obligating you to do something you don't want to. Report Final score: 31points Rockstar POST Sarah Sarah Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago Yes, this. I was taught instead to be accommodating to everyone. Guess what skill I didn't have, then, when boys started pressuring me to have sex? Right. 3 3points reply View More Replies... View more comments #4 YOU CAN CHANGE YOUR MIND ABOUT THINGS.
ITS NOT ILLEGAL TO TELL YOUR FAMILY ONE THING THAT YOU THINK AND THEN CHANGE YOUR MIND
I struggled with this with my sexuality/gender, i told my parents i was bi, then i was like oh shoot i think im a lesbian. and i thought i couldn't tell them because i already came out.
REMEMBER THAT, IT"S OKAY TO CHANGE Report Final score: 26points -logansucrose- (he/him) POST Tracy Sellars Tracy Sellars Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago I wouldn't say you are changing your mind about your sexuality rather you are discovering who you truly are. 8 8points reply View More Replies... View more comments #5 You can learn as much (if not more) from your failures than your successes.
Never be afraid to try because you might fail.
from building relationships to rebuilding an engine, I use this advice daily. Report Final score: 23points David Scholl POST Jill Tremblay Jill Tremblay Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago Good one ! 2 2points reply #6 To not handle stress the way they did. My mom would explode in anger. My dad would repress. Neither one is healthy, and I do both. I developed anxiety and depression when I started puberty and am still dealing with both more than 40 years later, and still struggling with healthy coping mechanisms. Report Final score: 21points Nikki Sevven POST Jill Tremblay Jill Tremblay Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago The trouble with this is...... No one really knows the "correct" way to handle stress and EVERY single person on earth is going to handle it differently. You can have internal stress that you don't even realize you have only to end up with a panic attack and major anxiety. Talk to people, admit your anxiety and try to read and learn from MANY MANY people. Do what is best for you. 2 2points reply View more comments #7 My parents often thought that if they didn’t tell me about something that they didn’t think would be a problem, then it wouldn’t apply to me.
The one that has affected me most significantly is Financial management: living within my means, bills, debts, credit, taxes, credit scores, savings, emergency funds and budgeting… in turn that converted to being stuck in bad situations, abusive relationships, horrible jobs and endangering myself in various ways trying to numb the pain.
Money conversations were off limits and I spent my 20’s being anxious, severely in debt and ashamed that I didn’t know better. I was completely clueless and constantly stuck and couldn’t talk to them about it because they didn’t understand.
10 years (and about £100k in interest/fees later) I live debt free and frugally with the conscious aim of always having an exit plan and enough money to support the privilege of a life with options. Report Final score: 19points Beakatron5000 POST Kathy L Kathy L Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago Congrats for turning it around! You've cleaned your family roots of this issue. 2 2points reply View more comments #8 How to save money. Perhaps more important thing, knowing how to spend it wisely. Report Final score: 18points Speedgoat POST Miss Frankfurter Miss Frankfurter Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago This! 3 3points reply View more comments #9 That they, nor you, are perfect and this is okay. Report Final score: 17points Mina POST #10 That smoking turns you into a slave to nicotine to the point where you’ll do any disgusting thing to get a hit. It is just as bad as any other drug n I’ve been addicted for about 40 years now. I showed my kid aged seven or eight at the time me making roll ups from the butts in my ashtray n told her this is the real “glamour” of smoking. I’m proud to say she never started. She’s nigh on 32 now, so looks like I got that right! Report Final score: 16points Rai Grant POST Manndy Fisher Manndy Fisher Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago Yes, I can 100% relate to that. And well done to you for teaching her a good lesson. I hope I will succeed in that too. 3 3points reply View more comments #11 That it's OK to just be me...and that I don't need to be like everyone else. Report Final score: 16points Missmic POST Helen Haley Helen Haley Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago I wish my mom had done this a little less. Do you know how hard it is when you don't fit in anywhere? 0 0points reply View More Replies... View more comments #12 I wish my mom would have thought me more about adult life and what to expect from it. I learned at a very young age to take care of myself, but I always wished I knew more about how the world worked. Report Final score: 14points Aelita Senvaitytė POST Jill Tremblay Jill Tremblay Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago No one really knows how the world works. Thankfully there is the internet for you know to learn anything you want to. 0 0points reply #13 Posture. They told me to sit up straight, but just left it as "it looks bad" or even just "because we said so"
If someone had told me "Hey, if you slouch and have bad posture, when you get into your 40s and 50s, you will have nearly crippling pain from arthritis and other issues that it will cause", then MAYBE I would have listened, and avoided some of this... Report Final score: 14points George Mhyre POST Eventually Eventually Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago I have scoliosis, and I think I need to learn this. I'm 17, and I just have trouble thinking so far ahead. Do you have any advice? 1 1point reply #14 It isn’t a lesson, but I wished they would’ve stopped me from over eating/forcing me to eat healthy. I now suffer from false body dysmorphia, and have finally been seeing loss in weight after years of over eating. Report Final score: 13points Chef Latte POST #15 A better understanding of ADHD! Report Final score: 9points GqIce POST #16 Anger management. Report Final score: 9points Sarah Barker POST Caro Caro Caro Caro Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago Lots of people underestimate this. 1 1point reply #17 How to manage and express your emotions in a healthy way Report Final score: 9points Fei POST Helen Haley Helen Haley Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago They probably didn't know. 2 2points reply #18 That is ok to fail. I was identified as gifted/talented in 2nd grade & spent the rest of my school years with the expectation that I'd succeed at everything without really trying. When I lost interest in school they treated me like a pariah & in adulthood I've struggled with perfectionism as a result. Report Final score: 9points SlothyK8 POST Leigh C. Leigh C. Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago I wasn't a "gifted" student but I was considered talented in art, in general, just because I loved to draw and was good for my age. Not a pariah. But the pedestal I was placed on did nothing for my art education. I was expected to have prior understanding of proportioning, light/dark ratios and value, how shapes are pretty much the only thing that matters. As an adult I took a hiatus from picking up a pencil to sketch. If I forced myself I couldn't do anything but scribble and lost any motivation in pursuing a career in art, as I had wanted to growing up. I became lost and living in survival mode. I've just gotten back into art this year and finding I need to learn the basics I should've been taught in school. 1 1point reply #19 Sex education, how it works, how to be safe and healthy etc. Report Final score: 9points Billie POST #20 How to manage money! My parents never gave us an allowance. I know that not every kid gets that...but with my son, we paid him small amounts to help us with chores that were outside his regular list. As a result, not only did he learn that you can get what you want later if you are willing to sacrifice now...but that a good days work can make all the difference in how much faster you can get to your goal. Report Final score: 8points Carol Emory POST Helen Haley Helen Haley Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago This isn't strictly true. 1 1point reply View more comments #21 How to speak the language that half of my family speaks all the time. Some extended relatives don’t even speak english! Now I have to learn myself and it’s so much harder. Report Final score: 8points Eventually POST Caro Caro Caro Caro Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago This. My dutch parents in Aussie forgot to teach us dutch. It was hard when we moved to the Netherlands at first. 1 1point reply View more comments #22 That it is not ok to put other people down, no matter how different from you they are. Report Final score: 8points Marianne Saiso POST Ana.V. Ana.V. Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago This! 0 0points reply #23 i wish they had told me that it's ok to have some standards or expectations in relationships.
I have been told that should be grateful if anyone ever wants to spend time with me, since I'm "so difficult" and just "an intense person".
It's probably right, I think I am indeed too intense and somewhat hard to be around.
But still.
When I was with my first boyfriend, I never said no to anything. "Why would he still want to spend time with me, of I don't do what he likes?" is what i thought back than. I avoid relationships now since that didn't work out too well.
If anything bothers me, I don't dare to talk about it. So my friendships tend to be exhausting for me and than they fail. "why would they want to spend time with me if i complain?" is what i think now.
I can't seem to find a way out of this. Report Final score: 8points royal_antelope POST S S Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago I, too, am an intense person. There are people out there who are good people of substance, who would be a good partner for you. I recommend three things: 1) Be friends first. If you just jump into a relationship without being friends first, of course you will seem like "a lot to handle". But if you are friends first, you build a relationship where they get to know who you are and how you function slowly. 2) Understand you can be a lot and find ways to spread out your 'a lot-ness'. Have multiple people that you go to for support. Your partner is a huge part of your life, but they should not be ALL of it. 3) Check out a therapist. If that's too expensive, write in a private blog or journal. Also - your intensity is a gift. There are plenty of people who appreciate and cherish people like you and me. Just realize that like any skill, it requires practice and honing to master and use positively and intentionally (think of like any super hero's origin story and how they start off.). :) 1 1point reply #24 I’m a twin. My sister was the perfect kid: straight A student, popular, outgoing, well-adjusted, beautiful. I was always in her shadow. I still am. I wish they would have taught me that success, beauty, and quirks have many faces. I still struggle with self esteem and it created a wedge between us for a long time but we’re in a better place now. Never put your kids against each other, especially twins. I wish they would have taught me just because I’m not like her, doesn’t mean I’m a failure. Report Final score: 8points alex cosgrove POST Improperplays Improperplays Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago But. You are :) 1 1point reply #25 I wish my parents explained to me that private colleges cost (a lot!) more than state schools. It's embarrassing to admit now, but I had no idea. No one told me! To their credit, they didn't go to college so they probably didn't know either. I grew up in a pretty poor area, the high school didn't have college prep counselors or anything, so I found this out the hard way. Report Final score: 6points John C POST Jill Tremblay Jill Tremblay Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago I'm just curious how you found this out "the hard way". Did you attend a private college for a year and THEN get the bill? It doesn't usually work that way..... 0 0points reply View More Replies... View more comments #26 That I am enough and deserve respect. Report Final score: 6points Marilynn Berry POST Kaleb Kaleb Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago True 0 0points reply #27 How to tie my own shoes. People make so much fun of me and my velcro strap shoes!!!!!!! Report Final score: 5points Thorfin Wolfsbane POST Terilee Bruyere Terilee Bruyere Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago I don't know why that was downvoted. There are occupational therapy tools (try Fun and Function) that can help you learn to tie your shoes. There are also bungie laces available that don't have that velcro look to them. 2 2points reply View more comments #28 That not speaking about things doesn't mean they're not happening. Report Final score: 5points ThoughtsAreNotFacts POST Jill Tremblay Jill Tremblay Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago This goes against the Laws of Attraction. -1 -1point reply #29 I wish my parents had taught me money and time management. Report Final score: 5points Vanessa Wanner POST #30 That it's a much greater feeling when people notice how smart, lovely, talented, or funny you are...without you telling them. Report Final score: 5points thewickedwest POST #31 What to do, how to react, when I told them I was bullied at school. My mother just said I should ignore it. And how to defend myself against sexual abuse. There were two times when I was abuse by friends of the family. My father doesn't know of it. My mother does and she does nothing. Report Final score: 5points Maren Gärtner POST PixxelDust PixxelDust Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago So horrible! PLEASE tell someone. Preferably the police. Worst case scenario they can't find any evidence and you continue as normal. PLEASE DO NOT STAY SILENT! IT'S THE WORST POSSIBLE MOVE~ 3 3points reply See Also on Bored Panda Woman Shows How "Harry Potter" Characters Were Supposed To Look According To Book Descriptions (35 Pics) 50 ‘Weird Facts’ About The World That Might Give You A Fresh Perspective #32 IQ and Emotional Intelligence are neither related nor interchangeable. Report Final score: 5points Bob Stuart POST #33 This simple sentence: "I'll think about it".
That one simple sentence has increased my savings more than anything else over the years. Whenever I'm tempted to buy an item on impulse in a shop or feeling pressured by the assistant, I just tell them (or myself) 'I'll think about it. 9 out of 10 times I won't go back because I don't really need that item, and money saved is as good as money earned. Report Final score: 5points Zoe Ming POST Leigh C. Leigh C. Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago I like to tell myself "It's nice to look at. That's it. I don't need it in my place to collect dust and look at every day." 0 0points reply #34 Making mistakes is okay. You don't need to be perfect and you don't need to give your 100% at all time if it means you will get burn out and not be able to give at all.
Perfectionism has ruined and paralyzed my life over the years, and I'm just having to unlearn it and stop overthinking and just do it and take risks sometimes... Report Final score: 5points Bethany Lingle POST #35 That everyone becomes either more or less attractive as you get to know them. Remember which you category you'd want to be in. Report Final score: 4points thewickedwest POST #36 Kindness. Both of my parents came from rather harsh upbringings. There wasn't a lot of kindness Report Final score: 4points Judy Durante POST Ana.V. Ana.V. Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago I can feel you 1 1point reply #37 I wish I had been taught to budget, delay gratification, to avoid alcohol, save for retirement, be emotionally stronger. Now that I'm "older" I accept responsibility to learn and live these things, but it would have been so much easier to learn these things as a teenager or younger. Report Final score: 3points Glowdaddy POST John C John C Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago but WOULD you have learned them from your parents' lectures? many have to make their own mistakes to really learn these lessons. don't beat yourself up too bad 2 2points reply View More Replies... View more comments #38 Humanity is f****d Report Final score: 3points badboyhalo POST #39 Where the tape measure is and to use it to measure my bra size every so often. I got sent to the hospital because my bra was too tight and I was bleeding. If you think “omg how did I not notice!” It’s because it was a fairly old bra I hadn’t worn in a while but I thought it still fit. Now I measure myself like every day. Report Final score: 3points Happi doggi (all pronouns) POST Leigh C. Leigh C. Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago Omg. 3 3points reply #40 To think for yourself, and question beliefs, do your own research...then they wouldn't have joined that cult... Report Final score: 3points H Moore POST Kaleb Kaleb Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago Damn 0 0points reply #41 Accept yourself Report Final score: 3points Unknownperson POST See Also on Bored Panda Overworked Employee Quits Because He Wasn't Getting A Fair Wage, Costs The Company $40 Million 40 Embarrassing Moments People Didn't Know Who They Were Talking To And Made A Fool Of Themselves #42 That you don’t need a degree to be successful and to follow what you’re passionate in life Report Final score: 3points Kat Sotiriou POST #43 To be unafraid. Don't be afraid of going out of your comfort zone...to travel, to try new things. My mother was over-protective and afraid of everything. Don't go here because it's not safe. Don't do that because you'll fail. I wish they had pushed me to be braver. Report Final score: 3points Bookmaiden POST PixxelDust PixxelDust Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago Worse if your parents shove you off to soccer training when you're literally having a panic attack and tell you you'll feel better afterwards. (spoiler: I spent another 2 hours still having the panic attack after) 0 0points reply #44 that you're not the center of the universe. you're not a little god, or king. and that you should become financiary independant before starting any consideration about yourself. Live into the real life, then you'll maybe be allowed to place a judgement Report Final score: 2points jpaul POST #45 I wish I was taught more about gender and sexual orientation. sure, my parents are accepting bu Report Final score: 2points alex he/him POST Shrek Bunny (Submission author) Shrek Bunny Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago Oops it got cut off- I meant to say my parents are accepting, but I never really was told about any of that. I learned it on my own. 2 2points reply #46 To not take s**t from anyone including yourself or them. Report Final score: 2points JagJenCon POST #47 Ambition and drive. I wish my parents had pushed me harder and made me strive and plan ahead. I don't blame them for anything but I wish my dad especially had been more involved and I wish mum had pushed back when I didn't try hard enough. Report Final score: 2points Go fuck yourself POST #48 I wish they'd taught me how to keep a secret or be discreet.... I was a bit always like that anyway, even before i became an intel analyist.... but it does still piss me off a bit that both my mum and dad thrive off gossip and neither can keep anything to them f****n' selves for longer than it takes to dial their mates and gossip. Report Final score: 2points GenericPanda09 POST #49 How to prepare for college and get into an actual career. None of my parents went to college. I don't even know where to start on how to pay for tuition, or where to go to get some sort of experience. Report Final score: 2points MyOpinionHasBeenServed POST #50 How to manage money. Wise spending, budgeting, savings, tithing, how to use a credit card, this list goes on. Report Final score: 2points BeagGraineag POST #51 How to deal with money. Report Final score: 2points Vihra Stancheva POST See Also on Bored Panda 30 Of The Most Hectic Homes As Shared On 'The Broke Agent' Instagram Account Bride Doesn't Include Wedding Dinner Price In Her Wedding Invites, Is Surprised To See Many Guests Canceling On Her After They Find Out #52 That real parents try the best they can, and sometimes the get disappointments that could take Report Final score: 1point Diphylleia Grayi POST #53 Clean your teeth!
I was never taught how important oral hygiene was.
I did with my own kids telling them if they neglected their chompers, they would end up with the tombstones I have. Report Final score: 1point Jon Jobling POST #54 "No matter how hard you try nor how much you believe in yourself, you will fail and hurt anyway because life is hell and people are demons." Report Final score: 1point Ryan Deschanel POST PixxelDust PixxelDust Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago someone finally understands. 1 1point reply #55 Studying. I was basically labelled as 'gifted' and cruised through primary skill. I am now stuck in an extension program in high school with little study skill and zero motivation. Thanks mum. Report Final score: 1point PixxelDust POST PixxelDust (Submission author) PixxelDust Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago School, not skill*** 0 0points reply Anyone can write on Bored Panda. Start writing! Follow Bored Panda on Google News! Follow us on Flipboard.com/@boredpanda! Add Your Answer! Not your original work? Add source Publish Change image Upload Photo Ooops! Your image is too large, maximum file size is 8 MB. Upload Upload Edit Image Error occurred when generating embed. Please check link and try again. Render conversation
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Title Update Yuki Li Follow Unfollow Yuki Li Author, Community member This lazy panda forgot to write something about itself. Read more » Aelita Senvaitytė Aelita Senvaitytė Moderator, BoredPanda staff Aelita is an Editor for Bored Panda. She makes sure all the articles are well done and fun to read!She enjoys all things creative, like drawing, playing guitar, and writing fantasy stories. On lazier days you can find her playing video games or binging a TV show. Read more » Show All Contributors Get the latest inspiring stories via our awesome iOS app! Download Bored Panda app! 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Woman Takes DNA Test For Fun Only To Discover Her Long-Term Boyfriend Is Her Full Sibling "I Just Said Thank You And Left": Man’s Nice Gesture Is Praised After Pizza Hut Driver Got A $20 Tip On A $938 Order Leave a comment POST Black Karen Black Karen Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago That I matter. 1 1point reply Keeker Dee Keeker Dee Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago How to make friends 1 1point reply Viviane Viviane Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago A colleague from a family of 10 children told me that his parents only had time to ensure that their children were fed and clothed. He knew little when he moved out on his own. I said, "In other words, you had to raise yourself all over again." "Yup". 1 1point reply Load More Comments POST Black Karen Black Karen Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago That I matter. 1 1point reply Keeker Dee Keeker Dee Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago How to make friends 1 1point reply Viviane Viviane Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 year ago A colleague from a family of 10 children told me that his parents only had time to ensure that their children were fed and clothed. He knew little when he moved out on his own. I said, "In other words, you had to raise yourself all over again." "Yup". 1 1point reply Load More Comments Popular on Bored Panda I Used AI To See What These 23 Popular Cartoon Characters Would Look Like In Real Life 30 Y.O. 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Son Tells His Parents He’ll Never Speak To Them Again After Finding Out They’re Paying For Sister’s Education Yet Didn’t Pay For His Employee Maliciously Complies To Work Only His 8 1/2 Hours, Makes The Company Lose $85k Per Year "Never Come Back To My Restaurant": Chef Bans Rude Restaurant Patrons And Gives $1,350 Bill To 22 Y.O. 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Son Tells His Parents He’ll Never Speak To Them Again After Finding Out They’re Paying For Sister’s Education Yet Didn’t Pay For His Dad Overhears A Conversation Between His New Wife And His Son, Cancels The Mother’s Day Celebration He’d Planned Management Introduces Disciplinary Rules To Make Most Of Employees, Freaks Out When They Turn The Rules Against Them 32-Year-Old Independent Modern Woman Draws Comics On Her Observations About Society (30 New Pics) "Lost In History": 50 Pictures That Shed A New Light On Our Past 50 Times Teachers Hung The Funniest Signs In Their Classrooms And They Ended Up Being Praised Online "An Entitled Mother Insists That I 'Share' My Nintendo Switch With Her Child On My Flight" 50 Times People Spotted Stupid Design Decisions In Public Places And Just Had To Share Employee Maliciously Complies To Work Only His 8 1/2 Hours, Makes The Company Lose $85k Per Year 30 People Who Quit Their Jobs With Style (New Pics) People Are Roasting Airbnb For Getting Completely Out Of Hand, Here Are 30 Of The Most Savage Tweets Woman Buys Ex-Hoarder's Home With All Of Their Belongings, Spends 4 Years Cleaning When Relatives Start Demanding Heirlooms They Didn't Want Clueless Director Calls For A Meeting Over Mass Resignation After Company Cancels WFH, Employee Explains It In A Way He Would Understand I Used AI To See What These 30 Popular Cartoon Characters Would Look Like In Real Life, And Here's The Result (New Pics) Chefs Are Sharing 30 Common Cooking Mistakes We Need To Avoid 50 Times Signs Were So Funny, People Had To Share Them On This Facebook Page Employee Gets Told They're "Replaceable", So They Play Along And It Ruins The Company Follow We're also on Instagram and tumblr App Store App Store User Submissions Hey Pandas, How Often Do You Forget Something Important, And What Was The Result? 35replies 21 points Hey Pandas, Share Pics Of Your Halloween Decorations 4comments 22 points This Artist Continues To Create Amazing Logic-Challenging Photo Manipulations (70 New Pics) 5comments 33 points Hey Pandas, What's Something You've Made Yourself? 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