Woman Bans Mother-In-Law From Her House After She Hung A Framed Wedding Photo Of Her Son And His Ex-Wife Bored Panda Bored Panda works better on our iPhone app Continue in app Continue in browser Like what you're reading? Subscribe to our top stories Please enter email address By submitting email you agree to get Bored Panda newsletter. We respect your privacy. We will not publish or share your email address in any way. Almost finished... To complete the subscription process, please click the link in the email we just sent you. Almost finished... To complete the subscription process, please click the link in the email we just sent you. Are you leaving already? Are you sure you want to post this? We're asking people to rethink comments that seem similar to others that have been reported or downvoted this warning is a mistake x x Let's fight boredom together! Continue with Facebook Continue with Google or Log In Don't have an account? Sign Up Forgot your password? Creating an account means you agree with Bored Panda's Terms of Service 0, text: error()"> Become a member Sign Up Have an account? Login Forgot your password? Creating an account means you agree with Bored Panda's Terms of Service 0, text: error(), css: errorCssClass"> Password reminder Please provide your email address and we will send your password shortly. Send Have an account? Login Don't have an account? Sign Up Get our top 10 stories in your inbox: Finish 0, text: error(), css: errorCssClass"> Please enter your email to complete registration Finish 0, text: error(), css: errorCssClass"> Activate to continue Your account is not active. We have sent an email to the address you provided with an activation link. Check your inbox, and click on the link to activate your account. I have already activated my account Resend activation link We and our trusted partners use technology such as cookies on our site to personalize content and ads, provide social media features, and analyze our traffic. You can read more about it and change your preferences here. Agree Bored Panda iOS App Available on App Store Continue in App Bored Panda Android App Available on Google Play Continue in App By using our services you agree to our use of cookies to improve your visit. You can change your preferences here. Agree BoredPanda Login Add Post Search ArtPhotographyAnimalsFunnyTravelIllustrationComicsDIYGood NewsParentingChallengeAsk Pandas More Featured Trending Latest Newsletter The Bored Panda iOS app is live! Fight boredom with iPhones and iPads here. Bored Panda Woman Bans Mother-In-Law From Her House After She Hung A Framed Wedding Photo Of Her Son And His Ex-Wife Home Partnership Advertise Success stories Jobs About us Contact 145points 2.4K Relationships8 months ago

Woman Bans Mother-In-Law From Her House After She Hung A Framed Wedding Photo Of Her Son And His Ex-Wife

Rokas Laurinavičius and
Ilona Baliūnaitė
Marriage isn't just a partnership between two people and their mutually agreed-upon commitments and boundaries. For better or worse, their families also enter the mix. And in Reddit user u/alt_account_ad's case, it's definitely the latter. A few days ago, she submitted her story to the 'Am I The A***ole?' community, asking if she overreacted after a conflict with her mother-in-law. It all started when the two were helping the woman and her husband settle into their new home. The lady thought she had a strong word there as well, so she "invited" over another person, her son's ex, and hung her picture on the wall. As you can imagine, things quickly imploded and grew into a much bigger problem, involving multiple people. But surprisingly, the author of the post still lacks (moral) support. Continue scrolling to check out her version of what happened and tell us in the comments if you think she's blown the situation out of proportion or not.

A 31-year-old woman got into a huge argument with her mother-in-law over her husband s ex

Image credits: Antonio_Diaz (not the actual photo)

And turned to the internet to ask people if she overreacted

Robert Weiss, Ph.D., LCSW, Chief Clinical Officer of Seeking Integrity, is an expert in the treatment of adult intimacy disorders and thinks that healthy boundaries are not about keeping other people out; instead, they're about letting them safely in. "At the same time, they keep us from invading others' space in ways that violate their boundaries," he explained. "Just as importantly, our boundaries should never be about controlling someone else's behavior; instead, our boundaries are about our own behavior. We have a right to experience our own thoughts, our own feelings, and our own sense of reality. Others, in turn, have the same right." So it sounds like the lady was clearly out of her depth, telling her daughter-in-law that her feelings were basically invalid. But why? Well, we don't know for sure, but it could be insecurity. Elizabeth Dorrance Hall, Ph.D., who is an Assistant Professor of Communication at Michigan State University and director of the Family Communication and Relationships Lab, says that mother-and-daughter-in-law relationships are somewhat programmed to be tricky. "Think about a man marrying a woman," she explained. "His soon-to-be wife is gaining a mother-in-law, and his mom is gaining a daughter-in-law. The daughter-in-law relationship is new, but the mother-son relationship is also especially changing during this time. The son has a new woman in his life, who is taking on some of the roles and responsibilities of his mother. This changing of roles and responsibilities may feel threatening to his mother." OP's husband being away might've had more effect on the situation than it seems at first. "The interactions between his mother and his new wife revolve around him, at least in the beginning [so] many people prefer to be present during any interaction between new in-laws to help monitor and facilitate conversation. Over time, this may change, and the mother-in-law/daughter-in-law relationship may develop into something that stands alone, but even still, they are linked because of the son. Researchers call the son in this scenario the linchpin. He is a linchpin, because he holds the other two people together. The linchpin is ever-present in an in-law relationship." Of course, in-laws can show respect for one another's differing values and get along quite fine. Just not these. At least not yet.

Everyone unanimously said the lady s behavior was completely inappropriate

Anyone can write on Bored Panda. Start writing! Follow Bored Panda on Google News! Follow us on Flipboard.com/@boredpanda! Share on Facebook Rokas Laurinavičius Rokas Laurinavičius Writer, BoredPanda staff Rokas is a writer at Bored Panda with a BA in Communication. After working for a sculptor, he fell in love with visual storytelling and enjoys covering everything from TV shows (any Sopranos fans out there?) to photography. Throughout his years in Bored Panda, over 235 million people have read the posts he's written, which is probably more than he could count to. Read more » Ilona Baliūnaitė Ilona Baliūnaitė Author, BoredPanda staff Ilona is a photo editor at Bored Panda with an MA in Communication Of Creative Society. Before Bored Panda, she worked as a social media manager and freelance graphic designer. When she is not photoshopping or searching for the most interesting photos for stories, she is usually watching good movies and says that The Godfather is the best. 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POST Bill Allen Bill Allen Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 8 months ago Probably the reason the MIL likes the previous wife is because she didn’t stand up for herself when the MIL did crazy s**t. Before we married, my wife and I lived together for a couple of years. My mother sent a nasty letter to my wife’s parents about us living in sin and bashed them about how they raised such a daughter. It did get better when she found out we weren’t going to play her games but I initially told my SO that she didn’t have to ever have any contact with my mother if my mother was going to treat her like that. We’ve now been married for 42 years and counting. Don’t accept bad behavior from anybody. Including your parents. 100 100points reply LJ Robinson LJ Robinson Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 8 months ago 5 stars! 10/10!! I said something similar, but not as well. I completely agree with you. 30 30points reply Load More Replies... Wesley Lucas Wesley Lucas Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 8 months ago Good for you for sticking up for your wife, Bill. So many others are in relationships where they can't even count on their spouses to have their backs. My mom is toxic - I mean antisocial personality disorder toxic (meaning she is a TRUE sociopath). Growing up with THAT for a mother had already warped and distorted my views on what "normal" is so when I started dating and she tried to play her head games and manipulative moves, it was often to the detriment of my partners and, ultimately, our relationship. My husband has, on several occasions, stood up for me against my own mom and family and has taken my side against his own parents when appropriate and I've done the same for him whenever my mom or sister start in on their b******t. It may sound silly but I don't think I've ever loved him more than in those moments, knowing that he was TRULY on my side against the world, even if that meant putting a line between himself and his folks. Glad to hear your marriage is still strong ? 4 4points reply David Force David Force Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 8 months ago (edited) My wife is the nicest person I know and she has lots of friends and is universally loved. The only person that ever made her cry was her own mother. One day they were on the phone together and I saw tears in my wife’s eyes. I was calm but angry and I asked my wife to hand me the phone. I told my mother in law that she was the only person in the word that ever made my wife cry and that would stop now if she ever wanted to talk to her again. I am a very nice man and my MIL never heard me angry before. She never again made my wife cry and we have been happily married for 35 years. My MIL is now a sweet 92 year old who is grateful to her only daughter for helping her with her dementia. 5 5points reply Donna McKinley Donna McKinley Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 8 months ago It's really lovely that you were so supportive of your wife, and also took a stand to prevent your parents from hurting and manipulating her. 4 4points reply Lola Lola Community Member • points posts comments upvotes 8 months ago You’re one in a million. Most men would just side with their mothers. 3 3points reply Ernest Hemingway Ernest Hemingway Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 8 months ago Yeah, just make sure "it's the hill you are willing to die on". For sure sometimes a man needs to choose, but remember that he is only sure one of those women loves him. A man should be able to stand up to his mother firmly, and not put up with crazy. But a woman who asks him to choose...JS..."hill to die on". As a man, I have keep a romantic life seperate and limited from family. I couldn't care 2 s#!ts what my mom thinks of my GF, but if I was told by my GF to choose? Bye Felicia. -2 -2points reply Molly Spurgeon Molly Spurgeon Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 8 months ago I added my own story here as well, but we're only about 1-2 years into hindsight of the initial action of confronting the problematic parent and sticking to it. So I just wanted to say thank you to you for sharing your story and for having your spouse's back and for spreading the word that we should not make exceptions for parents when it comes to "not accepting ___ behavior" in our lives/maintaining our boundaries. Well done! 0 0points reply Pernille Dyre Pernille Dyre Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 8 months ago Wow! 0 0points reply Lola Lola Community Member • points posts comments upvotes 8 months ago The problem is here that no boundaries have been set. This MIL shouldn’t even think she has the right to do that, never mind actually doing it. This was a tactic to get you to fight with your husband, and it seems like she won. Be careful who you ask to help. And before you do, make sure they know their limits. Set clear boundaries, especially with in-laws. 57 57points reply Donna Stapleton Donna Stapleton Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 8 months ago 6 6points reply Load More Replies... Gaby Almodovar Gaby Almodovar Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 8 months ago This marriage won't last long, MIL is not just simple toxic, she is evil. 43 43points reply Lola Lola Community Member • points posts comments upvotes 8 months ago It doesn’t have to end if her husband is being understanding. They simply have to set strong boundaries. People do as much as you let them do. 30 30points reply Load More Replies... Gaby Almodovar Gaby Almodovar Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 8 months ago I doubt, that the husband will ban his own mother from the house. But if she (MIL) will continue her visits, she'll find million ways to bitter the wife's life. 5 5points reply Tulin Bell Tulin Bell Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 8 months ago He already proved that he won't have his wife's back. Marriage is doomed 4 4points reply Danette Brozik Danette Brozik Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 8 months ago This comment has been deleted. 0 0points reply András Czapári András Czapári Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 5 months ago You are so wrong. First of all, people do as much as you let them do as long as there are consequences, because by saying "don't do that because it disrespects me" you won't really convince anyone... Secondly, there are people who wouldn't learn from serious consequences either. My father never learnt to respect me, not even after I completely shut him out of my life. 0 0points reply anarkzie anarkzie Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 8 months ago It will if they try to make it work. 1 1point reply Lara Kristelle Lara Kristelle Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 5 months ago Oh that might be why ex didn't stick around. 0 0points reply Load More Comments POST Bill Allen Bill Allen Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 8 months ago Probably the reason the MIL likes the previous wife is because she didn’t stand up for herself when the MIL did crazy s**t. Before we married, my wife and I lived together for a couple of years. My mother sent a nasty letter to my wife’s parents about us living in sin and bashed them about how they raised such a daughter. It did get better when she found out we weren’t going to play her games but I initially told my SO that she didn’t have to ever have any contact with my mother if my mother was going to treat her like that. We’ve now been married for 42 years and counting. Don’t accept bad behavior from anybody. Including your parents. 100 100points reply LJ Robinson LJ Robinson Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 8 months ago 5 stars! 10/10!! I said something similar, but not as well. I completely agree with you. 30 30points reply Load More Replies... Wesley Lucas Wesley Lucas Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 8 months ago Good for you for sticking up for your wife, Bill. So many others are in relationships where they can't even count on their spouses to have their backs. My mom is toxic - I mean antisocial personality disorder toxic (meaning she is a TRUE sociopath). Growing up with THAT for a mother had already warped and distorted my views on what "normal" is so when I started dating and she tried to play her head games and manipulative moves, it was often to the detriment of my partners and, ultimately, our relationship. My husband has, on several occasions, stood up for me against my own mom and family and has taken my side against his own parents when appropriate and I've done the same for him whenever my mom or sister start in on their b******t. It may sound silly but I don't think I've ever loved him more than in those moments, knowing that he was TRULY on my side against the world, even if that meant putting a line between himself and his folks. Glad to hear your marriage is still strong ? 4 4points reply David Force David Force Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 8 months ago (edited) My wife is the nicest person I know and she has lots of friends and is universally loved. The only person that ever made her cry was her own mother. One day they were on the phone together and I saw tears in my wife’s eyes. I was calm but angry and I asked my wife to hand me the phone. I told my mother in law that she was the only person in the word that ever made my wife cry and that would stop now if she ever wanted to talk to her again. I am a very nice man and my MIL never heard me angry before. She never again made my wife cry and we have been happily married for 35 years. My MIL is now a sweet 92 year old who is grateful to her only daughter for helping her with her dementia. 5 5points reply Donna McKinley Donna McKinley Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 8 months ago It's really lovely that you were so supportive of your wife, and also took a stand to prevent your parents from hurting and manipulating her. 4 4points reply Lola Lola Community Member • points posts comments upvotes 8 months ago You’re one in a million. Most men would just side with their mothers. 3 3points reply Ernest Hemingway Ernest Hemingway Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 8 months ago Yeah, just make sure "it's the hill you are willing to die on". For sure sometimes a man needs to choose, but remember that he is only sure one of those women loves him. A man should be able to stand up to his mother firmly, and not put up with crazy. But a woman who asks him to choose...JS..."hill to die on". As a man, I have keep a romantic life seperate and limited from family. I couldn't care 2 s#!ts what my mom thinks of my GF, but if I was told by my GF to choose? Bye Felicia. -2 -2points reply Molly Spurgeon Molly Spurgeon Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 8 months ago I added my own story here as well, but we're only about 1-2 years into hindsight of the initial action of confronting the problematic parent and sticking to it. So I just wanted to say thank you to you for sharing your story and for having your spouse's back and for spreading the word that we should not make exceptions for parents when it comes to "not accepting ___ behavior" in our lives/maintaining our boundaries. Well done! 0 0points reply Pernille Dyre Pernille Dyre Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 8 months ago Wow! 0 0points reply Lola Lola Community Member • points posts comments upvotes 8 months ago The problem is here that no boundaries have been set. This MIL shouldn’t even think she has the right to do that, never mind actually doing it. This was a tactic to get you to fight with your husband, and it seems like she won. Be careful who you ask to help. And before you do, make sure they know their limits. Set clear boundaries, especially with in-laws. 57 57points reply Donna Stapleton Donna Stapleton Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 8 months ago 6 6points reply Load More Replies... Gaby Almodovar Gaby Almodovar Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 8 months ago This marriage won't last long, MIL is not just simple toxic, she is evil. 43 43points reply Lola Lola Community Member • points posts comments upvotes 8 months ago It doesn’t have to end if her husband is being understanding. They simply have to set strong boundaries. People do as much as you let them do. 30 30points reply Load More Replies... Gaby Almodovar Gaby Almodovar Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 8 months ago I doubt, that the husband will ban his own mother from the house. But if she (MIL) will continue her visits, she'll find million ways to bitter the wife's life. 5 5points reply Tulin Bell Tulin Bell Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 8 months ago He already proved that he won't have his wife's back. Marriage is doomed 4 4points reply Danette Brozik Danette Brozik Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 8 months ago This comment has been deleted. 0 0points reply András Czapári András Czapári Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 5 months ago You are so wrong. First of all, people do as much as you let them do as long as there are consequences, because by saying "don't do that because it disrespects me" you won't really convince anyone... Secondly, there are people who wouldn't learn from serious consequences either. My father never learnt to respect me, not even after I completely shut him out of my life. 0 0points reply anarkzie anarkzie Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 8 months ago It will if they try to make it work. 1 1point reply Lara Kristelle Lara Kristelle Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 5 months ago Oh that might be why ex didn't stick around. 0 0points reply Load More Comments Popular on Bored Panda I Used AI To See What These 23 Popular Cartoon Characters Would Look Like In Real Life 30 Y.O. 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