142 Funny Horse Puns That Are Just Oat Standing
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Justė Kairytė - Barkauskienė
Publish Not your original work? Add source Horses, the flawless, majestic beasts whose hoofbeats match the beats of your heart, whose flowy manes remind you of your warmest dreams, with noble eyes that peer right into your soul. The tireless helpers of humans, on whose backs civilizations were built. The relentless poop-producers, the professionals of getting spooked at their own farts, then having a misstep in the process and generating a vet bill equal to your trust fund. Powerful beasts capable of running all day relentlessly, yet lacking the ability to puke and just deciding to die after eating one too many apples. Aaaah, the duality of the blue-blooded steed is surely an inspiration for clever puns. And since we haven't already talked about these four-legged, odd-toed rascals, it's about time that we dedicate an article to them. And you know the homages that we like the most, so get ready for an awesome article full of only the best horse puns! Even thinking about the hilarity that's soon to unfold before your very own eyes makes us laugh to the point where our voices get a little horse. Oh, and talking about little horses, did you know that ponies are Satan's pets? Haven't you heard it before? Then just talk about it with anyone in possession of such a deceptively cute furry demon, and they'll definitely confirm this notion! As will some of our clever quotes, indeed. Although their bigger brothers (in fact, the bigger, the more kindhearted) are a bit closer to divinity, their gracefulness is matched with clumsiness, and their couldn't-care-less attitude really shines through when they decide to release a huge cloud of noxious fumes from their behind straight into your nostrils. Charming! As charming, in fact, as these silly puns themselves! The duality with horses is an ever-persistent one, and if this moment you are witnessing an ethereal entity galloping through a sunshiny meadow, then the next, the same 600-kilo beast slips and smacks down right on his behind. While farting, of course. And since this duality will never leave horses, it will also never leave the hilarious puns associated with them as some of them are both corny yet clever, silly yet smart. Alrighty, then, we're definitely hot to trot for some hilarious puns, and hopefully, you are too! You'll find our picks of the funniest horse puns just a couple of hoofbeats below, and trust us, some of them are exactly like they came from a horse's mouth! Meaning, awesome! Then, after you're done reading these cool puns and are neighing from the hilarity, give the puns that have tickled your fancy a vote. Also, share this article with your friends and that one horse-obsessed girl you went to school with. This post may include affiliate links. #1 Maybe she’s barn with it… Maybe it’s neighbelline. Report 19points POST #2 Just got paid? It’s nice to be financially stable. Report 14points POST #3 We had a government-employed doctor in our area who was half horse and half man. He was from the centaur for disease control. Report 14points POST #4 Scratchy throat? You sound a little hoarse. Report 12points POST #5 My neighbor has a horse that has an explosive pace. I guess we should name him Neigh-palm! Report 11points POST #6 Can I ask you equestrian? Neigh. Report 9points POST #7 I bought a horse on the spur of the moment. It was a bad decision, and now I am saddled with tons and tons of responsibilities! Report 9points POST #8 Why did the horse cross the road? Because somebody shouted hay! Report 8points POST #9 Our neighbor has a horse named Mayo, and well, Mayo neighs a lot. Report 8points POST #10 Horses are avid readers of books by J.K. Rowling. Their favorite book is Harry Trotter and Hoofblood Prince. Report 8points POST #11 After visiting the bathroom, the winged horse used the pegaflushes! Report 8points POST #12 My friend is half horse… And always the centaur of attention. Report 7points POST #13 My horse is nocturnal… A true night-mare! Report 7points POST #14 What type of computer does a horse like to eat? A Macintosh. Report 7points POST #15 Jockeys are often considered to be clouds as they hold the reins! Report 7points POST #16 I saw my brother riding uncomfortably on a tall horse. I told him to get off his high horse! Report 7points POST #17 The only horse which will never lose a bet is Sherbet! Report 7points POST #18 Before the much-anticipated race, my jockey was very anxious. So I told him not to be impatient and hold on to his horses! Report 7points POST #19 If your horses get possessed by demons, only consult an ex-horse-ist! Report 7points POST #20 A little horse borrowed some money from his big brother and couldn't pay him back for quite a while. So, one day his brother became impatient and told him, "pony up!" Report 7points POST #21 The horse stalls at the racetrack were labeled F, E, D, B, and A. I got confused, and when asked about it, they said it was because no one had ever bet on a seahorse. Report 7points POST #22 Just before the race, the young horse was extremely charged up as it ate a little bit of haywire! Report 7points POST #23 Ponies are wonderful hosts as they have amazing horse-pitality! Report 7points POST #24 Why did the horses always miss the support acts at gigs? They are only interested in the mane attraction. Report 7points POST #25 Why don’t horses like being promoted? They hate being saddled with extra responsibility. Report 7points POST #26 What’s another term for a horse haircut? Mane-tenance. Report 7points POST #27 Those things they put in horses’ mouths – do they hurt? A bit. Report 7points POST #28 Go to bed! It’s pasture bedtime! Report 6points POST #29 Who were the two best horse thieves in the world? Bonnie and Clydesdale! Report 6points POST #30 I heard you have a new boyfriend. He’s my mane man! My ride-or-die! Report 6points POST #31 Why are we going so slow? Just need a little more horsepower. Report 6points POST #32 Would you like some ketchup? And mayo-neighs? Report 6points POST #33 My horse is in the hospital… But good news! He’s stable! Report 6points POST #34 Did you like these horse puns? Yay or neigh? Report 6points POST #35 What type of horses only go out at night? Night-mares. Report 6points POST #36 What did the horse say when it fell? “I’ve fallen and I can’t giddyup!” Report 6points POST #37 Where do horses shop? Old Neigh-vy. Report 6points POST #38 Where do horses go when they’re sick? The horsepital. Report 6points POST #39 Why did the boy stand behind the horse? He thought he might get a kick out of it! Report 6points POST #40 Why did the horse eat with its mouth open? Because it had bad stable manners. Report 6points POST #41 The farm owner has a couple of horses and a huge sum of money in his bank. He is definitely financially stable! Report 6points POST #42 The little pony didn't win the singing competition as he was a little hoarse! Report 6points POST #43 The stallion was an avid adventurer and has visited many places across the world. He surely is a globe-trotter! Report 6points POST #44 The man who owned the riding school was in dire straits as his business always kept falling down! Report 6points POST #45 My neighbor has a horse who always neighs loudly at night. She's a night-mare to live with! Report 6points POST #46 I once got in a bit of trouble and decided to ask my horse for advice. My friend told me not to because horses are a couple of neigh sayers. Report 6points POST #47 I saw my horse watching TV, so I asked him what was his favorite show. He replied, 'The Neigh-bors'. Report 6points POST #48 I was riding my horse whose ropes were painted every color. I named it rein-bow. Report 6points POST #49 The arrogant horse was picked on by the other animals of the farm as they thought the horse would stirrup trouble any day. Report 6points POST #50 A Bronco went to a shop to buy a packet of juice, but the manager kicked him out because he just had one buck. Report 6points POST #51 One of the most difficult jobs is to talk with a racehorse. They hardly stand furlong! Report 6points POST #52 Princess Elsa never really feared any horses. Probably because the colt never bothered her anyway. Report 6points POST #53 Horses are extremely fond of playing indoor games. They usually spend their leisure time playing stable tennis! Report 6points POST #54 The arrested horse was released by the police because it de-neigh-ed everything. Report 6points POST #55 The bad horse didn't want to answer any question that was asked of him, so he kept on stalling! Report 6points POST #56 There was a joust, but the horse missed it as he had the knight off! Report 6points POST #57 The good horse has always maintained a good shape as he had a stable diet! Report 6points POST #58 The amateur artist displayed a lot of horse paintings and drawings as he was eager to mount an exhibit! Report 6points POST #59 The horse was shown the red card and asked to leave the field while playing soccer as he would foal very often! Report 6points POST #60 Horses only ever go to one place to cut and get their hair done. They all go to Maine. Report 6points POST #61 I recently bought a painting from a farmer who only draws pictures of horses and cows. His name I heard is Oscar Moo-neigh. Report 6points POST #62 Horses only ever have one hospital where they can go to have babies. It's in Philly. Report 6points POST #63 I finally scolded my horse a lot because it ate all of the bedding in its stable, and it was the last straw. Report 6points POST #64 I had this recurring dream that I had become a horse since last week. I had it tonight too. Now it's six nights on the trot. Report 6points POST #65 After saving up his salary, the horse decided to buy the car he dreamt of. It was a Fjord Focus! Report 6points POST #66 Horses usually travel via inter-galloptic space when traveling from one galaxy to another! Report 6points POST #67 The horse was getting ready for the gala, so he visited his tail-or to get his suit fixed! Report 6points POST #68 The stylish horse's hair always shines brightly in the sun as he mane-tains it! Report 6points POST #69 Which opinion poll do horses put most faith in? Gallup. Report 6points POST #70 How was the horse after the accident? In a stable condition. Report 6points POST #71 How did the horse with the speech impediment feel after corrective surgery went wrong? A bit filly. Report 6points POST #72 Why do horses queue up so badly? They’re always jockeying for position. Report 6points POST See Also on Bored Panda Woman Shows How "Harry Potter" Characters Were Supposed To Look According To Book Descriptions (35 Pics) 50 ‘Weird Facts’ About The World That Might Give You A Fresh Perspective #73 Which seats do horses book at the theatre? Anywhere in the stalls. Report 6points POST #74 What did the Italian horse say when he heard there was a speed between trot and gallop? I canter believe it! Report 6points POST #75 What kind of vacuum cleaner do horses prefer? A Hoofer. Report 6points POST #76 Did you see how good that new blacksmith was at fitting horseshoes? He absolutely nailed it! Report 6points POST #77 What boxing technique does a horse prefer? The pommel. Report 6points POST #78 Rein it in with the gossip! You’ll stirrup trouble. Report 5points POST #79 Have you ever heard of the band Foals? They have a colt following. Report 5points POST #80 Still complaining? Get off your high horse. Report 5points POST #81 Let’s skip the opening act. I only care to see the mane event. Report 5points POST #82 What do you call a horse who lives next door? Neighbor! Report 5points POST See Also on Bored Panda Overworked Employee Quits Because He Wasn't Getting A Fair Wage, Costs The Company $40 Million 40 Embarrassing Moments People Didn't Know Who They Were Talking To And Made A Fool Of Themselves #83 To be or not to be… That is the equestrian. Report 5points POST #84 Come on kid… Quit foaling around! Report 5points POST #85 Help! I’ve fallen and can’t giddy-up! Report 5points POST #86 What did the mare tell her filly after dinner? “Don’t forget to clear the stable!” Report 5points POST #87 What’s the difference between a horse and the weather? One is reined up and the other rains down. Report 5points POST #88 I read a novel that had the story of a runaway horse. It was such a bad tale of 'whoa'. Report 5points POST #89 When the little horse stayed up late at night, his father shouted at him, "Little foal go to bed as it is pasture bedtime". Report 5points POST #90 My brother woke up late and was running late for work, so I told him to hoof it! Report 5points POST #91 The only disease that most horses are scared of is Hay fever! Report 5points POST #92 Before an important race, the champion horse prefers eating bread. His favorite is the thoroughbred! Report 5points POST See Also on Bored Panda 30 Of The Most Hectic Homes As Shared On 'The Broke Agent' Instagram Account Bride Doesn't Include Wedding Dinner Price In Her Wedding Invites, Is Surprised To See Many Guests Canceling On Her After They Find Out #93 A horse that has a negative attitude in life can always be seen saying "Neigh". Report 5points POST #94 The newly married horses were looking for a place to stay. They finally went to a hotel and booked the bridle suit! Report 5points POST #95 A lion decided to become a horse. So decided to name himself Stal-lion! Report 5points POST #96 The fanciest horse which never takes part in a race is a clotheshorse! Report 5points POST #97 The little train which was named 'Pony' could gallop really fast as it had a very powerful horsepower engine! Report 5points POST #98 Horses are extremely independent animals, and they can talk whinney wants to! Report 5points POST #99 During winter, my horse developed a sore throat. So, I gave him a cough stirrup! Report 5points POST #100 Horses that participate in races have special diets. They only eat fast foods! Report 5points POST #101 My brother applied as an assistant stable caretaker. The farm really needs a co-pile-it! Report 5points POST #102 If a horse is asked to cast his vote for the Senate of the horses, it usually had the option of a hay or a neigh! Report 5points POST See Also on Bored Panda I Used AI To See What These 23 Popular Cartoon Characters Would Look Like In Real Life 30 Y.O. Woman Takes DNA Test For Fun Only To Discover Her Long-Term Boyfriend Is Her Full Sibling #103 The pony was a good journalist as he always brought news straight from the horse's mouth! Report 5points POST #104 The white horse decided to run away from his own wedding. He probably got colt feet! Report 5points POST #105 The horse, while climbing a mountain, fell down and said to his friend, "Help me please, I cannot giddyup". Report 5points POST #106 A horse in the jungle lost all his clothes and ran around to find some. Whenever the other horses saw him, they pointed at him and shouted, "Neigh-kid! neigh-kid!" Report 5points POST #107 In a game of poker, the horse kept on losing but won the game in the last round. It was amazing how the stables turned in the end! Report 5points POST #108 The only American Football team that every horse supports is the Denver Broncos. Report 5points POST #109 A horse won the horse racing competition at school and became quite popular overnight. He was the new stud of the school. Report 5points POST #110 The anthem for horses is 'Watch me whip… watch me neigh neigh'. Report 5points POST #111 In a race, a horse named 'Black Beauty' beat the odds to win the race. Guess she was indeed the dark horse! Report 5points POST #112 Just before any thunder, horses see lightning colts! Report 5points POST See Also on Bored Panda "I Just Said Thank You And Left": Man’s Nice Gesture Is Praised After Pizza Hut Driver Got A $20 Tip On A $938 Order Woman Flabbergasted At Thrift Store's Prices, Calls Them Out By Sharing 14 Examples #113 The teacher horse who specialized in teaching philosophy displayed a glass half-filled with water and asked his students, "Is the glass hood empty or hoof filled?" Report 5points POST #114 The young horse was ambitious to join the top colleges of the country. He wanted to join the neigh-vy league! Report 5points POST #115 Horses usually carry their lunches to work wrapped in aluminum foal! Report 5points POST #116 One should never insult any jockey. It's because they always get angry and take of-fence. Report 5points POST #117 Horses are very bad at boxing as they just keep on hitting the hay! Report 5points POST #118 The young pony was wildly excited about being called up to the sports rally as he thought it would be a big end-horse-ment! Report 5points POST #119 Just before the final race, one horse wanted to quit, so his friend asked him if it was an equest-ionable decision! Report 5points POST #120 The horse bought a house, and he decided to pay his mortgage in in-stallion-ments for ten years! Report 5points POST #121 When the Jedi Knight was to embark on a long adventure, his horse wished him, "May the horse be with you". Report 5points POST #122 While visiting a shopping mall, the horse had to visit the loo, so he went to the bathroom stall-ion. Report 5points POST See Also on Bored Panda 50 Parents Having A Pretty Miserable Day Photoshop Troll Who Takes Photo Requests Too Literally Strikes Again, And The Result Is Hilarious (17 Pics) #123 When does a horse get depressed by the weather? When it reins. Report 5points POST #124 Why did the horse get an award? It was out standing in its field. Report 5points POST #125 What is a horse’s favorite bread? Thorough. Report 5points POST #126 How do you greet the horse living next door? Howdy, neigh-bour. Report 5points POST #127 When do horses always stand to attention? Whenever you play the Grand National Anthem. Report 5points POST #128 Did you hear the joke about the horse that was hobbled? It’s a bit lame. Report 5points POST #129 What do you use to make a horse change gear? A canter-lever. Report 5points POST #130 What’s a horse’s favorite sport? Stable-tennis! Report 4points POST #131 Wine? Sure, I’ll have some Chardonhay. Report 4points POST #132 Why should you never be rude to a jump jockey? In case he takes offence. Report 4points POST See Also on Bored Panda 50 People Who Are Having A Terrible Day At Work 30 Mistakes Made By Designers And Architects Who Didn’t Think Of The Person Who’d Be Using Their Designs #133 Why do horses fart when they buck? Because they can’t achieve full horse power without gas. Report 4points POST #134 Horses are exceptional lawyers as they always capture the attention to de-tail! Report 4points POST #135 Horses love rock music, and they adore the band, Queen. Their favorite song is 'Crazy Little Thing Colt Love'. Report 4points POST #136 The little horse was scolded by his teacher as he always kept foaling around the class! Report 4points POST #137 The only cheese that can completely disguise a small horse is a mascarpone! Report 4points POST #138 The horse had no friends as he always bail-ed on everyone! Report 4points POST #139 Horses usually drink wine and champagne on a de-canter! Report 4points POST #140 Horses love country music. Their favorite musician and singer is Colt-on Underwood! Report 4points POST #141 The only degree that a horse achieves after completing college is a pedegree! Report 4points POST #142 Horse’s favorite pop duo? Stall and Oats! Report 4points POST Anyone can write on Bored Panda. Start writing! Follow Bored Panda on Google News! Follow us on Flipboard.com/@boredpanda! Add Your Answer! Not your original work? Add source Publish Change image Upload Photo Ooops! Your image is too large, maximum file size is 8 MB. Upload Upload Edit Image Error occurred when generating embed. Please check link and try again. Render conversation
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Title Update Miglė Follow Unfollow Miglė Author, Community member This lazy panda forgot to write something about itself. Read more » Justė Kairytė - Barkauskienė Justė Kairytė - Barkauskienė Author, BoredPanda staff Justė is a copywriter here at Bored Panda, and though her studies at the Veterinary Academy seemingly have nothing to do with writing, the passion for animals and nature helps in creating the most interesting and engaging posts. She also works with Search Engine Optimization, so you could find Bored Panda's articles easier.
Justė's not only an avid equestrian, but she's also a walking encyclopedia. Ask her anything! Read more » Show All Contributors Get the latest inspiring stories via our awesome iOS app! Download Bored Panda app! 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142 Funny Horse Puns That Are Just Oat-Standing
8Kviews Miglė andJustė Kairytė - Barkauskienė
Publish Not your original work? Add source Horses, the flawless, majestic beasts whose hoofbeats match the beats of your heart, whose flowy manes remind you of your warmest dreams, with noble eyes that peer right into your soul. The tireless helpers of humans, on whose backs civilizations were built. The relentless poop-producers, the professionals of getting spooked at their own farts, then having a misstep in the process and generating a vet bill equal to your trust fund. Powerful beasts capable of running all day relentlessly, yet lacking the ability to puke and just deciding to die after eating one too many apples. Aaaah, the duality of the blue-blooded steed is surely an inspiration for clever puns. And since we haven't already talked about these four-legged, odd-toed rascals, it's about time that we dedicate an article to them. And you know the homages that we like the most, so get ready for an awesome article full of only the best horse puns! Even thinking about the hilarity that's soon to unfold before your very own eyes makes us laugh to the point where our voices get a little horse. Oh, and talking about little horses, did you know that ponies are Satan's pets? Haven't you heard it before? Then just talk about it with anyone in possession of such a deceptively cute furry demon, and they'll definitely confirm this notion! As will some of our clever quotes, indeed. Although their bigger brothers (in fact, the bigger, the more kindhearted) are a bit closer to divinity, their gracefulness is matched with clumsiness, and their couldn't-care-less attitude really shines through when they decide to release a huge cloud of noxious fumes from their behind straight into your nostrils. Charming! As charming, in fact, as these silly puns themselves! The duality with horses is an ever-persistent one, and if this moment you are witnessing an ethereal entity galloping through a sunshiny meadow, then the next, the same 600-kilo beast slips and smacks down right on his behind. While farting, of course. And since this duality will never leave horses, it will also never leave the hilarious puns associated with them as some of them are both corny yet clever, silly yet smart. Alrighty, then, we're definitely hot to trot for some hilarious puns, and hopefully, you are too! You'll find our picks of the funniest horse puns just a couple of hoofbeats below, and trust us, some of them are exactly like they came from a horse's mouth! Meaning, awesome! Then, after you're done reading these cool puns and are neighing from the hilarity, give the puns that have tickled your fancy a vote. Also, share this article with your friends and that one horse-obsessed girl you went to school with. This post may include affiliate links. #1 Maybe she’s barn with it… Maybe it’s neighbelline. Report 19points POST #2 Just got paid? It’s nice to be financially stable. Report 14points POST #3 We had a government-employed doctor in our area who was half horse and half man. He was from the centaur for disease control. Report 14points POST #4 Scratchy throat? You sound a little hoarse. Report 12points POST #5 My neighbor has a horse that has an explosive pace. I guess we should name him Neigh-palm! Report 11points POST #6 Can I ask you equestrian? Neigh. Report 9points POST #7 I bought a horse on the spur of the moment. It was a bad decision, and now I am saddled with tons and tons of responsibilities! Report 9points POST #8 Why did the horse cross the road? Because somebody shouted hay! Report 8points POST #9 Our neighbor has a horse named Mayo, and well, Mayo neighs a lot. Report 8points POST #10 Horses are avid readers of books by J.K. Rowling. Their favorite book is Harry Trotter and Hoofblood Prince. Report 8points POST #11 After visiting the bathroom, the winged horse used the pegaflushes! Report 8points POST #12 My friend is half horse… And always the centaur of attention. Report 7points POST #13 My horse is nocturnal… A true night-mare! Report 7points POST #14 What type of computer does a horse like to eat? A Macintosh. Report 7points POST #15 Jockeys are often considered to be clouds as they hold the reins! Report 7points POST #16 I saw my brother riding uncomfortably on a tall horse. I told him to get off his high horse! Report 7points POST #17 The only horse which will never lose a bet is Sherbet! Report 7points POST #18 Before the much-anticipated race, my jockey was very anxious. So I told him not to be impatient and hold on to his horses! Report 7points POST #19 If your horses get possessed by demons, only consult an ex-horse-ist! Report 7points POST #20 A little horse borrowed some money from his big brother and couldn't pay him back for quite a while. So, one day his brother became impatient and told him, "pony up!" Report 7points POST #21 The horse stalls at the racetrack were labeled F, E, D, B, and A. I got confused, and when asked about it, they said it was because no one had ever bet on a seahorse. Report 7points POST #22 Just before the race, the young horse was extremely charged up as it ate a little bit of haywire! Report 7points POST #23 Ponies are wonderful hosts as they have amazing horse-pitality! Report 7points POST #24 Why did the horses always miss the support acts at gigs? They are only interested in the mane attraction. Report 7points POST #25 Why don’t horses like being promoted? They hate being saddled with extra responsibility. Report 7points POST #26 What’s another term for a horse haircut? Mane-tenance. Report 7points POST #27 Those things they put in horses’ mouths – do they hurt? A bit. Report 7points POST #28 Go to bed! It’s pasture bedtime! Report 6points POST #29 Who were the two best horse thieves in the world? Bonnie and Clydesdale! Report 6points POST #30 I heard you have a new boyfriend. He’s my mane man! My ride-or-die! Report 6points POST #31 Why are we going so slow? Just need a little more horsepower. Report 6points POST #32 Would you like some ketchup? And mayo-neighs? Report 6points POST #33 My horse is in the hospital… But good news! He’s stable! Report 6points POST #34 Did you like these horse puns? Yay or neigh? Report 6points POST #35 What type of horses only go out at night? Night-mares. Report 6points POST #36 What did the horse say when it fell? “I’ve fallen and I can’t giddyup!” Report 6points POST #37 Where do horses shop? Old Neigh-vy. Report 6points POST #38 Where do horses go when they’re sick? The horsepital. Report 6points POST #39 Why did the boy stand behind the horse? He thought he might get a kick out of it! Report 6points POST #40 Why did the horse eat with its mouth open? Because it had bad stable manners. Report 6points POST #41 The farm owner has a couple of horses and a huge sum of money in his bank. He is definitely financially stable! Report 6points POST #42 The little pony didn't win the singing competition as he was a little hoarse! Report 6points POST #43 The stallion was an avid adventurer and has visited many places across the world. He surely is a globe-trotter! Report 6points POST #44 The man who owned the riding school was in dire straits as his business always kept falling down! Report 6points POST #45 My neighbor has a horse who always neighs loudly at night. She's a night-mare to live with! Report 6points POST #46 I once got in a bit of trouble and decided to ask my horse for advice. My friend told me not to because horses are a couple of neigh sayers. Report 6points POST #47 I saw my horse watching TV, so I asked him what was his favorite show. He replied, 'The Neigh-bors'. Report 6points POST #48 I was riding my horse whose ropes were painted every color. I named it rein-bow. Report 6points POST #49 The arrogant horse was picked on by the other animals of the farm as they thought the horse would stirrup trouble any day. Report 6points POST #50 A Bronco went to a shop to buy a packet of juice, but the manager kicked him out because he just had one buck. Report 6points POST #51 One of the most difficult jobs is to talk with a racehorse. They hardly stand furlong! Report 6points POST #52 Princess Elsa never really feared any horses. Probably because the colt never bothered her anyway. Report 6points POST #53 Horses are extremely fond of playing indoor games. They usually spend their leisure time playing stable tennis! Report 6points POST #54 The arrested horse was released by the police because it de-neigh-ed everything. Report 6points POST #55 The bad horse didn't want to answer any question that was asked of him, so he kept on stalling! Report 6points POST #56 There was a joust, but the horse missed it as he had the knight off! Report 6points POST #57 The good horse has always maintained a good shape as he had a stable diet! Report 6points POST #58 The amateur artist displayed a lot of horse paintings and drawings as he was eager to mount an exhibit! Report 6points POST #59 The horse was shown the red card and asked to leave the field while playing soccer as he would foal very often! Report 6points POST #60 Horses only ever go to one place to cut and get their hair done. They all go to Maine. Report 6points POST #61 I recently bought a painting from a farmer who only draws pictures of horses and cows. His name I heard is Oscar Moo-neigh. Report 6points POST #62 Horses only ever have one hospital where they can go to have babies. It's in Philly. Report 6points POST #63 I finally scolded my horse a lot because it ate all of the bedding in its stable, and it was the last straw. Report 6points POST #64 I had this recurring dream that I had become a horse since last week. I had it tonight too. Now it's six nights on the trot. Report 6points POST #65 After saving up his salary, the horse decided to buy the car he dreamt of. It was a Fjord Focus! Report 6points POST #66 Horses usually travel via inter-galloptic space when traveling from one galaxy to another! Report 6points POST #67 The horse was getting ready for the gala, so he visited his tail-or to get his suit fixed! Report 6points POST #68 The stylish horse's hair always shines brightly in the sun as he mane-tains it! Report 6points POST #69 Which opinion poll do horses put most faith in? Gallup. Report 6points POST #70 How was the horse after the accident? In a stable condition. Report 6points POST #71 How did the horse with the speech impediment feel after corrective surgery went wrong? A bit filly. Report 6points POST #72 Why do horses queue up so badly? They’re always jockeying for position. Report 6points POST See Also on Bored Panda Woman Shows How "Harry Potter" Characters Were Supposed To Look According To Book Descriptions (35 Pics) 50 ‘Weird Facts’ About The World That Might Give You A Fresh Perspective #73 Which seats do horses book at the theatre? Anywhere in the stalls. Report 6points POST #74 What did the Italian horse say when he heard there was a speed between trot and gallop? I canter believe it! Report 6points POST #75 What kind of vacuum cleaner do horses prefer? A Hoofer. Report 6points POST #76 Did you see how good that new blacksmith was at fitting horseshoes? He absolutely nailed it! Report 6points POST #77 What boxing technique does a horse prefer? The pommel. Report 6points POST #78 Rein it in with the gossip! You’ll stirrup trouble. Report 5points POST #79 Have you ever heard of the band Foals? They have a colt following. Report 5points POST #80 Still complaining? Get off your high horse. Report 5points POST #81 Let’s skip the opening act. I only care to see the mane event. Report 5points POST #82 What do you call a horse who lives next door? Neighbor! Report 5points POST See Also on Bored Panda Overworked Employee Quits Because He Wasn't Getting A Fair Wage, Costs The Company $40 Million 40 Embarrassing Moments People Didn't Know Who They Were Talking To And Made A Fool Of Themselves #83 To be or not to be… That is the equestrian. Report 5points POST #84 Come on kid… Quit foaling around! Report 5points POST #85 Help! I’ve fallen and can’t giddy-up! Report 5points POST #86 What did the mare tell her filly after dinner? “Don’t forget to clear the stable!” Report 5points POST #87 What’s the difference between a horse and the weather? One is reined up and the other rains down. Report 5points POST #88 I read a novel that had the story of a runaway horse. It was such a bad tale of 'whoa'. Report 5points POST #89 When the little horse stayed up late at night, his father shouted at him, "Little foal go to bed as it is pasture bedtime". Report 5points POST #90 My brother woke up late and was running late for work, so I told him to hoof it! Report 5points POST #91 The only disease that most horses are scared of is Hay fever! Report 5points POST #92 Before an important race, the champion horse prefers eating bread. His favorite is the thoroughbred! Report 5points POST See Also on Bored Panda 30 Of The Most Hectic Homes As Shared On 'The Broke Agent' Instagram Account Bride Doesn't Include Wedding Dinner Price In Her Wedding Invites, Is Surprised To See Many Guests Canceling On Her After They Find Out #93 A horse that has a negative attitude in life can always be seen saying "Neigh". Report 5points POST #94 The newly married horses were looking for a place to stay. They finally went to a hotel and booked the bridle suit! Report 5points POST #95 A lion decided to become a horse. So decided to name himself Stal-lion! Report 5points POST #96 The fanciest horse which never takes part in a race is a clotheshorse! Report 5points POST #97 The little train which was named 'Pony' could gallop really fast as it had a very powerful horsepower engine! Report 5points POST #98 Horses are extremely independent animals, and they can talk whinney wants to! Report 5points POST #99 During winter, my horse developed a sore throat. So, I gave him a cough stirrup! Report 5points POST #100 Horses that participate in races have special diets. They only eat fast foods! Report 5points POST #101 My brother applied as an assistant stable caretaker. The farm really needs a co-pile-it! Report 5points POST #102 If a horse is asked to cast his vote for the Senate of the horses, it usually had the option of a hay or a neigh! Report 5points POST See Also on Bored Panda I Used AI To See What These 23 Popular Cartoon Characters Would Look Like In Real Life 30 Y.O. Woman Takes DNA Test For Fun Only To Discover Her Long-Term Boyfriend Is Her Full Sibling #103 The pony was a good journalist as he always brought news straight from the horse's mouth! Report 5points POST #104 The white horse decided to run away from his own wedding. He probably got colt feet! Report 5points POST #105 The horse, while climbing a mountain, fell down and said to his friend, "Help me please, I cannot giddyup". Report 5points POST #106 A horse in the jungle lost all his clothes and ran around to find some. Whenever the other horses saw him, they pointed at him and shouted, "Neigh-kid! neigh-kid!" Report 5points POST #107 In a game of poker, the horse kept on losing but won the game in the last round. It was amazing how the stables turned in the end! Report 5points POST #108 The only American Football team that every horse supports is the Denver Broncos. Report 5points POST #109 A horse won the horse racing competition at school and became quite popular overnight. He was the new stud of the school. Report 5points POST #110 The anthem for horses is 'Watch me whip… watch me neigh neigh'. Report 5points POST #111 In a race, a horse named 'Black Beauty' beat the odds to win the race. Guess she was indeed the dark horse! Report 5points POST #112 Just before any thunder, horses see lightning colts! Report 5points POST See Also on Bored Panda "I Just Said Thank You And Left": Man’s Nice Gesture Is Praised After Pizza Hut Driver Got A $20 Tip On A $938 Order Woman Flabbergasted At Thrift Store's Prices, Calls Them Out By Sharing 14 Examples #113 The teacher horse who specialized in teaching philosophy displayed a glass half-filled with water and asked his students, "Is the glass hood empty or hoof filled?" Report 5points POST #114 The young horse was ambitious to join the top colleges of the country. He wanted to join the neigh-vy league! Report 5points POST #115 Horses usually carry their lunches to work wrapped in aluminum foal! Report 5points POST #116 One should never insult any jockey. It's because they always get angry and take of-fence. Report 5points POST #117 Horses are very bad at boxing as they just keep on hitting the hay! Report 5points POST #118 The young pony was wildly excited about being called up to the sports rally as he thought it would be a big end-horse-ment! Report 5points POST #119 Just before the final race, one horse wanted to quit, so his friend asked him if it was an equest-ionable decision! Report 5points POST #120 The horse bought a house, and he decided to pay his mortgage in in-stallion-ments for ten years! Report 5points POST #121 When the Jedi Knight was to embark on a long adventure, his horse wished him, "May the horse be with you". Report 5points POST #122 While visiting a shopping mall, the horse had to visit the loo, so he went to the bathroom stall-ion. Report 5points POST See Also on Bored Panda 50 Parents Having A Pretty Miserable Day Photoshop Troll Who Takes Photo Requests Too Literally Strikes Again, And The Result Is Hilarious (17 Pics) #123 When does a horse get depressed by the weather? When it reins. Report 5points POST #124 Why did the horse get an award? It was out standing in its field. Report 5points POST #125 What is a horse’s favorite bread? Thorough. Report 5points POST #126 How do you greet the horse living next door? Howdy, neigh-bour. Report 5points POST #127 When do horses always stand to attention? Whenever you play the Grand National Anthem. Report 5points POST #128 Did you hear the joke about the horse that was hobbled? It’s a bit lame. Report 5points POST #129 What do you use to make a horse change gear? A canter-lever. Report 5points POST #130 What’s a horse’s favorite sport? Stable-tennis! Report 4points POST #131 Wine? Sure, I’ll have some Chardonhay. Report 4points POST #132 Why should you never be rude to a jump jockey? In case he takes offence. Report 4points POST See Also on Bored Panda 50 People Who Are Having A Terrible Day At Work 30 Mistakes Made By Designers And Architects Who Didn’t Think Of The Person Who’d Be Using Their Designs #133 Why do horses fart when they buck? Because they can’t achieve full horse power without gas. Report 4points POST #134 Horses are exceptional lawyers as they always capture the attention to de-tail! Report 4points POST #135 Horses love rock music, and they adore the band, Queen. Their favorite song is 'Crazy Little Thing Colt Love'. Report 4points POST #136 The little horse was scolded by his teacher as he always kept foaling around the class! Report 4points POST #137 The only cheese that can completely disguise a small horse is a mascarpone! Report 4points POST #138 The horse had no friends as he always bail-ed on everyone! Report 4points POST #139 Horses usually drink wine and champagne on a de-canter! Report 4points POST #140 Horses love country music. Their favorite musician and singer is Colt-on Underwood! Report 4points POST #141 The only degree that a horse achieves after completing college is a pedegree! Report 4points POST #142 Horse’s favorite pop duo? Stall and Oats! Report 4points POST Anyone can write on Bored Panda. Start writing! Follow Bored Panda on Google News! Follow us on Flipboard.com/@boredpanda! Add Your Answer! Not your original work? Add source Publish Change image Upload Photo Ooops! Your image is too large, maximum file size is 8 MB. Upload Upload Edit Image Error occurred when generating embed. Please check link and try again. Render conversation
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Title Update Miglė Follow Unfollow Miglė Author, Community member This lazy panda forgot to write something about itself. Read more » Justė Kairytė - Barkauskienė Justė Kairytė - Barkauskienė Author, BoredPanda staff Justė is a copywriter here at Bored Panda, and though her studies at the Veterinary Academy seemingly have nothing to do with writing, the passion for animals and nature helps in creating the most interesting and engaging posts. She also works with Search Engine Optimization, so you could find Bored Panda's articles easier.
Justė's not only an avid equestrian, but she's also a walking encyclopedia. Ask her anything! Read more » Show All Contributors Get the latest inspiring stories via our awesome iOS app! Download Bored Panda app! 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