129 Cat Jokes That ll Have You Clawing For More
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Justė Kairytė - Barkauskienė
Publish Not your original work? Add source Although cats have that 'speak well or stay silent' presence on the internet, we here at Bored Panda are somewhat rebellious. So yup, we're not afraid to do a compilation of cat jokes that lovingly mocks the internet's overlords. Nope, we're not shivering in angst to present these funny cat jokes to you, too, for we know there's a great chance you're just as rebellious as we are! So get ready and read on for the most amusing animal jokes list we've done so far. Now, you might think that with our beloved felines being as awesome as they already are, no joke about cats could top the real deal. And you are right - we also agree that watching a cat do its thing is the most blessed thing ever; however, not all of us have the pleasure to do so. Thus, a silly joke is definitely the second-best thing, for it makes you laugh and lets your imagination run wild. And that creates probably the greatest combo ever - amazing cats and the limitless power of imagination. Agree? Well then, keep on reading until you get to the funny cat jokes themselves! Yup, we're almost there - the cute cat jokes are just a whisker's length below. Once you are there, give the best jokes your love by upvoting them! And when that is all done, share your favorites with your friends, too. This post may include affiliate links. #1 "Cats are more like 'Hey, what are you up to? Never mind — I just remembered I don’t care.'" — Zoltan Kaszas Report 23points POST #2 Where does a cat go when it loses its tail?
The re-tail store! Report 19points POST #3 Why are cats, great singers?
Because they're very mewsical! Report 18points POST #4 I saw a neighbor talking to her cat today, it was hilarious that she thought her cat could understand her. I went home and told my dog. Report 18points POST TheAquarius1978 TheAquarius1978 Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 month ago Its been proved that cats understand comands as well, if not better than dogs, they just choose to ignore them lol. 8 8points reply View More Replies... View more comments #5 I saw a poster today that asked, “Have you seen my cat?” So, I called the number and said that I didn’t. I like to help where I can. Report 16points POST #6 What's a cat's favorite color?
Purr-ple! Report 15points POST #7 What's a cat's favorite game to play with a mouse?
Catch! Report 15points POST #8 Why do cats make terrible storytellers?
They only have one tail. Report 15points POST #9 What's it called when all the treats are gone?
A cat-astrophe. Report 14points POST #10 Why was the cat afraid of the tree?
Because of its bark! Report 13points POST Down With Agent Hedgehog! Down With Agent Hedgehog! Community Member • points posts comments upvotes 1 month ago After a few days living with my dad’s shiba inu dogs in the house, my two cats have learned to bark. And after my dad trained them, Donut now fetches slippers. *shrugs and look mystified* am I raising two fake doggo-cats 3 3points reply View More Replies... View more comments #11 How do French cats say “Thank You”?
"Meow-ci Beaucoup." Report 13points POST #12 What's a cat's favorite dessert?
Chocolate mouse! Report 12points POST #13 What should you say to your cat when you leave the house?
"Have a mice day!" Report 12points POST #14 Why do cats always win video games?
Because they have nine lives! Report 12points POST #15 What's a kitten's favorite kind of sticker?
Scratch and sniff. Report 12points POST #16 A policeman in the big city stops a man in a car with a Siberian Lynx in the front seat. “What are you doing with that Siberian Lynx?” He exclaimed, “You should take it to the zoo.” The following week, the same policeman sees the same man with the cat again in the front seat, with both of them wearing sunglasses. The policeman pulls him over. “I thought you were going to take that cat to the zoo!” The man replied, “I did. We had such a good time we are going to the beach this weekend!” Report 12points POST #17 What do you call a pile of kittens?
A meowntain! Report 11points POST Down With Agent Hedgehog! Down With Agent Hedgehog! Community Member • points posts comments upvotes 1 month ago I need the shirt that says: “One Cat Far from Crazy Cat Lady” :) 1 1point reply #18 What sports do cats play?
Hairball! Report 11points POST #19 How did the Mom Cat know she was pregnant?
Her test was pawsitive. Report 11points POST #20 What does the cat say after making a joke?
"Just kitten!" Report 11points POST #21 What do you call it when a cat is super-stylish?
"Haute-cat-ture." Report 11points POST #22 What do cats look for in a significant other?
A great purrsonality. Report 11points POST #23 What did one cat say while her friend was complaining?
"Tail me about it." Report 11points POST #24 What song do kittens always request at dances?
"Mice Mice Baby." Report 11points POST #25 Why don't cats ever say "YOLO?"
They have nine lives. Report 11points POST #26 Why do cats make horrible DJs?
They always paws the tunes. Report 11points POST #27 What did the sick cat say?
"I feel clawful!" Report 11points POST #28 What do polite cats say when they’re in the way?
"Paw-don me! I’m furry sorry." Report 11points POST #29 Do you want to hear a bad cat joke?
Just kitten! Report 11points POST #30 Why do cats have minty breath?
The use mousewash. Report 11points POST #31 What is a cat's favorite movie?
The Sound of Mewsic! Report 10points POST #32 What do cats love to do in the morning?
Read the mewspaper! Report 10points POST #33 What state has a lot of cats and dogs?
Petsylvania! Report 10points POST Aunt Riarch Aunt Riarch Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 month ago I'm on my way... 1 1point reply #34 When a cat doesn't want to say goodbye, what do they say instead?
"See ya litter!" Report 10points POST #35 Why is it hard to trust cats?
They have many tall tails. Report 10points POST #36 A fun part of having a black cat is occasionally accidentally talking to a crumpled up black T-shirt on the floor. Report 10points POST #37 "I make a lot of jokes about my cat, but I always think wouldn’t it be fun if my cat was making jokes about me to his cat friends? That would be awesome if my cat was at home going 'What’s the deal with all the crying?'" — Debra DiGiovanni Report 10points POST #38 "Somewhere there is a house cat that did more than I did today." — Kristeen von Hagen Report 10points POST #39 "Knock Knock"
"Who’s there?"
"Cat!"
"Cat who?"
"Cat me outside, how bout dat?!" Report 10points POST #40 I have a pencil once owned by Shakespeare…
Thanks to the cat it’s so chewed up I can’t tell if it’s 2B or not 2B. Report 10points POST #41 What do Christmas and desert cats have in common?
Sandy claws. Report 10points POST #42 What's the unluckiest kind of cat to have?
A catastrophe! Report 10points POST #43 What do cats like to eat on a hot day?
A mice-cream cone! Report 9points POST #44 Why do cats always get their way?
They are very purr-suasive! Report 9points POST #45 How do two cats end a fight?
They hiss and make up! Report 9points POST #46 What should you use to comb a cat?
A catacomb! Report 9points POST #47 What's a cat's favorite magazine?
Good Mousekeeping! Report 9points POST #48 Where do cats always fly out of when they travel?
Kitty Hawk! Report 9points POST #49 How does a cat sing scales?
Do-re-mew! Report 9points POST #50 Why did the cat eat the lemons?
He was a sourpuss! Report 9points POST #51 What normally happens when kitties go on a first date?
They hiss. Report 9points POST #52 Before going after a mouse, what did the dad cat say to his family?
"Let us prey." Report 9points POST #53 What was the kitten bowling league called?
"Alley Cats." Report 9points POST #54 What do you call a cat who became a doctor?
"A first aid kitten." Report 9points POST #55 Why did the cat avoid eating lemons?
They made him a sour-puss. Report 9points POST #56 Why do cats hate laptops?
They don't have a mouse. Report 9points POST #57 Where do cats enjoy spending a family day?
The mew-seum. Report 9points POST #58 What do you call the cat that was caught by the police?
The purr-petrator. Report 9points POST Nonna_SoF Nonna_SoF Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 month ago An "honest" merchant. 0 0points reply #59 "I used to be in a band called 'Missing Cat'… You probably saw our posters." — Stewart Francis, comedian Report 9points POST #60 What do you call a feline with a short haircut?
A bob cat, of course Report 9points POST #61 What animals can you not trust?
Big cats! Because some are cheetahs, and some are always lion! Report 9points POST Russ Kincade Russ Kincade Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 month ago Cheetahs never prosper - Zazu, The Lion King. 2 2points reply #62 Why are cats better than babies?
Because you only have to change a litter box once a day. Report 9points POST #63 What did the alien say to the cat?
“Take me to your litter.” Report 9points POST #64 Did you hear about the cat who swallowed a ball of wool?
She had mittens. Report 9points POST #65 Who was the most powerful cat in China?
Chairman Miaow. Report 9points POST Aunt Riarch Aunt Riarch Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 month ago Yes we is old 1 1point reply #66 What is smarter than a talking cat?
A spelling bee! Report 9points POST See Also on Bored Panda Woman Shows How "Harry Potter" Characters Were Supposed To Look According To Book Descriptions (35 Pics) 50 ‘Weird Facts’ About The World That Might Give You A Fresh Perspective #67 Why was the cat sitting on the computer?
To keep an eye on the mouse! Report 9points POST #68 What’s a cat’s favorite button on the TV remote?
Paws. Report 9points POST #69 Why did the cat get pulled over by the police?
Because it littered. Report 9points POST #70 What did the cat say when it got scratched?
Meowch! Report 9points POST #71 "Knock, knock."
"Who's there?"
"Kitten."
"Kitten, who?"
"Quit kitten around and open the door." Report 9points POST #72 What did the cat say when it was confused?
"I'm purr-plexed!" Report 8points POST #73 How is cat food sold?
Usually, purr the can! Report 8points POST #74 What's another name for a cat's house?
A scratch pad! Report 8points POST #75 Why did the cats ask for a drum set?
They wanted to make some mewsic! Report 8points POST #76 Why did the cat have to go to an accountant?
They got caught up in a purramid scheme. Report 8points POST See Also on Bored Panda Overworked Employee Quits Because He Wasn't Getting A Fair Wage, Costs The Company $40 Million 40 Embarrassing Moments People Didn't Know Who They Were Talking To And Made A Fool Of Themselves #77 What did the kitten have at their birthday party?
A pounce house. Report 8points POST #78 Before a cat fight, what is usually said?
"Hold my purrse." Report 8points POST #79 Which day of the week do cats love the most?
Caturday. Report 8points POST #80 What did the mom and dad cat say about their wedding day?
"It was unfurrgetable!" Report 8points POST #81 How did the cat comic know he was funny?
The audience was meow-ling with laughter. Report 8points POST #82 Why did some cat friends go to the mall?
There was a buy-one-get-one-furry deal. Report 8points POST #83 If lights run on electricity and cars run on gas, what do cats run on?
Their paws. Report 8points POST #84 "My cat loves me so much that sometimes he stares at me with that look of love that’s almost creepy." — Debra DiGiovanni Report 8points POST #85 How many cats can you put into an empty box?
Only one. After that, the box isn’t empty. Report 8points POST #86 Why was the cat so agitated?
He was in a bad mewd. Report 8points POST See Also on Bored Panda 30 Of The Most Hectic Homes As Shared On 'The Broke Agent' Instagram Account Bride Doesn't Include Wedding Dinner Price In Her Wedding Invites, Is Surprised To See Many Guests Canceling On Her After They Find Out #87 Did you hear about the cat who drank five bowls of water?
He set a new lap record. Report 8points POST #88 Why did the cat wear a fancy dress?
She was feline fine! Report 7points POST #89 What do you call a cat who lives in an igloo?
An eskimew! Report 7points POST #90 What do cats use to make coffee?
A purr-colator! Report 7points POST #91 In what kind of weather is a vet the busiest?
When it's raining cats and dogs! Report 7points POST #92 What do you call a cat wearing shoes?
A puss in boots! Report 7points POST #93 What's a cat's favorite subject in school?
Hisss-tory! Report 7points POST #94 What types of cats purr the best?
Purrr-sians! Report 7points POST #95 What's a cat's favorite TV show?
Claw and Order. Report 7points POST #96 What's a cat's favorite cereal?
Mice crispies. Report 7points POST See Also on Bored Panda I Used AI To See What These 23 Popular Cartoon Characters Would Look Like In Real Life 30 Y.O. Woman Takes DNA Test For Fun Only To Discover Her Long-Term Boyfriend Is Her Full Sibling #97 When cats need to go to the airport, who do they call?
A tabby. Report 7points POST #98 What made the cat upgrade his phone?
He wanted to finally get pawtrait mode. Report 7points POST #99 Why did the kitty get an "A" on their English assignment?
They properly used an independent claws. Report 7points POST #100 Why don't you want to play Monopoly with a cat?
They tend to be cheetahs. Report 7points POST #101 Why are cats bad at making decisions?
They become so purrplexed. Report 7points POST #102 What's a kitten's fave way to shop?
By cat-alogue. Report 7points POST #103 Why was the animal lover so untrustworthy?
She kept letting the cat out of the bag! Report 7points POST #104 What do cats call a nice dinner?
"A fancy feast." Report 7points POST #105 Me: *Sobbing* One minute he loves me and the next he wants nothing to do me!
Therapist: That’s pretty typical cat behaviour. Report 7points POST #106 What did the cat say when he lost all his money?
"I’m paw!" Report 7points POST See Also on Bored Panda "I Just Said Thank You And Left": Man’s Nice Gesture Is Praised After Pizza Hut Driver Got A $20 Tip On A $938 Order Woman Flabbergasted At Thrift Store's Prices, Calls Them Out By Sharing 14 Examples #107 Did you hear about the passenger who had to be escorted off the airplane?
She let the cat out of the bag. Report 7points POST #108 A cat walks into a bar. The bartender says, “What’ll you have?” The cat says, “A shot of whiskey.” The bartender pours the cat his drink. Slowly, the cat pushes the shot off the bar... immediately demanding, “ANOTHER!!” Report 7points POST #109 What do you call a fluffy male cat asleep on a bed?
A Himalayan. Report 7points POST #110 How do you know a cat is agitated?
He's having a hissy fit! Report 6points POST billie wright billie wright Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 month ago Good one 0 0points reply #111 What do baby cats always wear?
Diapurrs! Report 6points POST #112 What title does a cat go by in the kitchen?
"The Whisker." Report 6points POST #113 What did the cats do when they realized they had a bad plan?
They decided to (cat)nip it in the bud. Report 6points POST #114 What do cats quote from the movie Bridesmaids?
"Help me, I'm paw!" Report 6points POST #115 Why are kittens actually excellent bosses?
They have great littership. Report 6points POST #116 What is a cat’s way of keeping law and order?
Claw Enforcement. Report 6points POST See Also on Bored Panda 50 Parents Having A Pretty Miserable Day Photoshop Troll Who Takes Photo Requests Too Literally Strikes Again, And The Result Is Hilarious (17 Pics) #117 Did you hear about the cat that climbed the Himalayas?
She was a sher-paw. Report 6points POST #118 What do you get when you cross a chick with an alley cat?
A peeping tom. Report 6points POST #119 My cat told a joke today but I didn’t laugh.
He took it purr-sondal. Report 6points POST #120 Someone made a joke about my three-legged cat.
Major faux paw. Report 6points POST #121 What's the Cheshire Cat's favorite drink?
Evaporated milk. Report 6points POST #122 How do cats stop crimes?
They call claw enforcement! Report 5points POST #123 Why did the teenage cat call her parents when she found an apartment she liked?
She needed them to (cali)co-sign her lease. Report 5points POST #124 What did the mom cat say about her intuition?
"I just had a strong feline." Report 5points POST #125 What's a cat's favorite sport?
Hair ball. Report 5points POST #126 Why was the cat so small?
Because it only ate condensed milk! Report 5points POST See Also on Bored Panda 50 People Who Are Having A Terrible Day At Work 30 Mistakes Made By Designers And Architects Who Didn’t Think Of The Person Who’d Be Using Their Designs #127 What do you get if you cross a tiger with a snowman?
Frostbite! Report 5points POST #128 What did the cat say after hearing a funny joke?
Lmao. Report 5points POST #129 What do cats eat for breakfast?
Mice Krispies! Report 4points POST Anyone can write on Bored Panda. Start writing! Follow Bored Panda on Google News! Follow us on Flipboard.com/@boredpanda! Add Your Answer! Not your original work? Add source Publish Change image Upload Photo Ooops! Your image is too large, maximum file size is 8 MB. Upload Upload Edit Image Error occurred when generating embed. Please check link and try again. Render conversation
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Title Update Larysa Perih Larysa Perih Author, BoredPanda staff Larysa is a list curator at Bored Panda. She loves hiking and spending time in the mountains. Huge fan of "Friends". Read more » Justė Kairytė - Barkauskienė Justė Kairytė - Barkauskienė Writer, BoredPanda staff Justė is a copywriter here at Bored Panda, and though her studies at the Veterinary Academy seemingly have nothing to do with writing, the passion for animals and nature helps in creating the most interesting and engaging posts. She also works with Search Engine Optimization, so you could find Bored Panda's articles easier.
Justė's not only an avid equestrian, but she's also a walking encyclopedia. Ask her anything! Read more » Show All Contributors Get the latest inspiring stories via our awesome iOS app! Download Bored Panda app! 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129 Cat Jokes That ll Have You Clawing For More
Larysa Perih andJustė Kairytė - Barkauskienė
Publish Not your original work? Add source Although cats have that 'speak well or stay silent' presence on the internet, we here at Bored Panda are somewhat rebellious. So yup, we're not afraid to do a compilation of cat jokes that lovingly mocks the internet's overlords. Nope, we're not shivering in angst to present these funny cat jokes to you, too, for we know there's a great chance you're just as rebellious as we are! So get ready and read on for the most amusing animal jokes list we've done so far. Now, you might think that with our beloved felines being as awesome as they already are, no joke about cats could top the real deal. And you are right - we also agree that watching a cat do its thing is the most blessed thing ever; however, not all of us have the pleasure to do so. Thus, a silly joke is definitely the second-best thing, for it makes you laugh and lets your imagination run wild. And that creates probably the greatest combo ever - amazing cats and the limitless power of imagination. Agree? Well then, keep on reading until you get to the funny cat jokes themselves! Yup, we're almost there - the cute cat jokes are just a whisker's length below. Once you are there, give the best jokes your love by upvoting them! And when that is all done, share your favorites with your friends, too. This post may include affiliate links. #1 "Cats are more like 'Hey, what are you up to? Never mind — I just remembered I don’t care.'" — Zoltan Kaszas Report 23points POST #2 Where does a cat go when it loses its tail?
The re-tail store! Report 19points POST #3 Why are cats, great singers?
Because they're very mewsical! Report 18points POST #4 I saw a neighbor talking to her cat today, it was hilarious that she thought her cat could understand her. I went home and told my dog. Report 18points POST TheAquarius1978 TheAquarius1978 Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 month ago Its been proved that cats understand comands as well, if not better than dogs, they just choose to ignore them lol. 8 8points reply View More Replies... View more comments #5 I saw a poster today that asked, “Have you seen my cat?” So, I called the number and said that I didn’t. I like to help where I can. Report 16points POST #6 What's a cat's favorite color?
Purr-ple! Report 15points POST #7 What's a cat's favorite game to play with a mouse?
Catch! Report 15points POST #8 Why do cats make terrible storytellers?
They only have one tail. Report 15points POST #9 What's it called when all the treats are gone?
A cat-astrophe. Report 14points POST #10 Why was the cat afraid of the tree?
Because of its bark! Report 13points POST Down With Agent Hedgehog! Down With Agent Hedgehog! Community Member • points posts comments upvotes 1 month ago After a few days living with my dad’s shiba inu dogs in the house, my two cats have learned to bark. And after my dad trained them, Donut now fetches slippers. *shrugs and look mystified* am I raising two fake doggo-cats 3 3points reply View More Replies... View more comments #11 How do French cats say “Thank You”?
"Meow-ci Beaucoup." Report 13points POST #12 What's a cat's favorite dessert?
Chocolate mouse! Report 12points POST #13 What should you say to your cat when you leave the house?
"Have a mice day!" Report 12points POST #14 Why do cats always win video games?
Because they have nine lives! Report 12points POST #15 What's a kitten's favorite kind of sticker?
Scratch and sniff. Report 12points POST #16 A policeman in the big city stops a man in a car with a Siberian Lynx in the front seat. “What are you doing with that Siberian Lynx?” He exclaimed, “You should take it to the zoo.” The following week, the same policeman sees the same man with the cat again in the front seat, with both of them wearing sunglasses. The policeman pulls him over. “I thought you were going to take that cat to the zoo!” The man replied, “I did. We had such a good time we are going to the beach this weekend!” Report 12points POST #17 What do you call a pile of kittens?
A meowntain! Report 11points POST Down With Agent Hedgehog! Down With Agent Hedgehog! Community Member • points posts comments upvotes 1 month ago I need the shirt that says: “One Cat Far from Crazy Cat Lady” :) 1 1point reply #18 What sports do cats play?
Hairball! Report 11points POST #19 How did the Mom Cat know she was pregnant?
Her test was pawsitive. Report 11points POST #20 What does the cat say after making a joke?
"Just kitten!" Report 11points POST #21 What do you call it when a cat is super-stylish?
"Haute-cat-ture." Report 11points POST #22 What do cats look for in a significant other?
A great purrsonality. Report 11points POST #23 What did one cat say while her friend was complaining?
"Tail me about it." Report 11points POST #24 What song do kittens always request at dances?
"Mice Mice Baby." Report 11points POST #25 Why don't cats ever say "YOLO?"
They have nine lives. Report 11points POST #26 Why do cats make horrible DJs?
They always paws the tunes. Report 11points POST #27 What did the sick cat say?
"I feel clawful!" Report 11points POST #28 What do polite cats say when they’re in the way?
"Paw-don me! I’m furry sorry." Report 11points POST #29 Do you want to hear a bad cat joke?
Just kitten! Report 11points POST #30 Why do cats have minty breath?
The use mousewash. Report 11points POST #31 What is a cat's favorite movie?
The Sound of Mewsic! Report 10points POST #32 What do cats love to do in the morning?
Read the mewspaper! Report 10points POST #33 What state has a lot of cats and dogs?
Petsylvania! Report 10points POST Aunt Riarch Aunt Riarch Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 month ago I'm on my way... 1 1point reply #34 When a cat doesn't want to say goodbye, what do they say instead?
"See ya litter!" Report 10points POST #35 Why is it hard to trust cats?
They have many tall tails. Report 10points POST #36 A fun part of having a black cat is occasionally accidentally talking to a crumpled up black T-shirt on the floor. Report 10points POST #37 "I make a lot of jokes about my cat, but I always think wouldn’t it be fun if my cat was making jokes about me to his cat friends? That would be awesome if my cat was at home going 'What’s the deal with all the crying?'" — Debra DiGiovanni Report 10points POST #38 "Somewhere there is a house cat that did more than I did today." — Kristeen von Hagen Report 10points POST #39 "Knock Knock"
"Who’s there?"
"Cat!"
"Cat who?"
"Cat me outside, how bout dat?!" Report 10points POST #40 I have a pencil once owned by Shakespeare…
Thanks to the cat it’s so chewed up I can’t tell if it’s 2B or not 2B. Report 10points POST #41 What do Christmas and desert cats have in common?
Sandy claws. Report 10points POST #42 What's the unluckiest kind of cat to have?
A catastrophe! Report 10points POST #43 What do cats like to eat on a hot day?
A mice-cream cone! Report 9points POST #44 Why do cats always get their way?
They are very purr-suasive! Report 9points POST #45 How do two cats end a fight?
They hiss and make up! Report 9points POST #46 What should you use to comb a cat?
A catacomb! Report 9points POST #47 What's a cat's favorite magazine?
Good Mousekeeping! Report 9points POST #48 Where do cats always fly out of when they travel?
Kitty Hawk! Report 9points POST #49 How does a cat sing scales?
Do-re-mew! Report 9points POST #50 Why did the cat eat the lemons?
He was a sourpuss! Report 9points POST #51 What normally happens when kitties go on a first date?
They hiss. Report 9points POST #52 Before going after a mouse, what did the dad cat say to his family?
"Let us prey." Report 9points POST #53 What was the kitten bowling league called?
"Alley Cats." Report 9points POST #54 What do you call a cat who became a doctor?
"A first aid kitten." Report 9points POST #55 Why did the cat avoid eating lemons?
They made him a sour-puss. Report 9points POST #56 Why do cats hate laptops?
They don't have a mouse. Report 9points POST #57 Where do cats enjoy spending a family day?
The mew-seum. Report 9points POST #58 What do you call the cat that was caught by the police?
The purr-petrator. Report 9points POST Nonna_SoF Nonna_SoF Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 month ago An "honest" merchant. 0 0points reply #59 "I used to be in a band called 'Missing Cat'… You probably saw our posters." — Stewart Francis, comedian Report 9points POST #60 What do you call a feline with a short haircut?
A bob cat, of course Report 9points POST #61 What animals can you not trust?
Big cats! Because some are cheetahs, and some are always lion! Report 9points POST Russ Kincade Russ Kincade Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 month ago Cheetahs never prosper - Zazu, The Lion King. 2 2points reply #62 Why are cats better than babies?
Because you only have to change a litter box once a day. Report 9points POST #63 What did the alien say to the cat?
“Take me to your litter.” Report 9points POST #64 Did you hear about the cat who swallowed a ball of wool?
She had mittens. Report 9points POST #65 Who was the most powerful cat in China?
Chairman Miaow. Report 9points POST Aunt Riarch Aunt Riarch Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 month ago Yes we is old 1 1point reply #66 What is smarter than a talking cat?
A spelling bee! Report 9points POST See Also on Bored Panda Woman Shows How "Harry Potter" Characters Were Supposed To Look According To Book Descriptions (35 Pics) 50 ‘Weird Facts’ About The World That Might Give You A Fresh Perspective #67 Why was the cat sitting on the computer?
To keep an eye on the mouse! Report 9points POST #68 What’s a cat’s favorite button on the TV remote?
Paws. Report 9points POST #69 Why did the cat get pulled over by the police?
Because it littered. Report 9points POST #70 What did the cat say when it got scratched?
Meowch! Report 9points POST #71 "Knock, knock."
"Who's there?"
"Kitten."
"Kitten, who?"
"Quit kitten around and open the door." Report 9points POST #72 What did the cat say when it was confused?
"I'm purr-plexed!" Report 8points POST #73 How is cat food sold?
Usually, purr the can! Report 8points POST #74 What's another name for a cat's house?
A scratch pad! Report 8points POST #75 Why did the cats ask for a drum set?
They wanted to make some mewsic! Report 8points POST #76 Why did the cat have to go to an accountant?
They got caught up in a purramid scheme. Report 8points POST See Also on Bored Panda Overworked Employee Quits Because He Wasn't Getting A Fair Wage, Costs The Company $40 Million 40 Embarrassing Moments People Didn't Know Who They Were Talking To And Made A Fool Of Themselves #77 What did the kitten have at their birthday party?
A pounce house. Report 8points POST #78 Before a cat fight, what is usually said?
"Hold my purrse." Report 8points POST #79 Which day of the week do cats love the most?
Caturday. Report 8points POST #80 What did the mom and dad cat say about their wedding day?
"It was unfurrgetable!" Report 8points POST #81 How did the cat comic know he was funny?
The audience was meow-ling with laughter. Report 8points POST #82 Why did some cat friends go to the mall?
There was a buy-one-get-one-furry deal. Report 8points POST #83 If lights run on electricity and cars run on gas, what do cats run on?
Their paws. Report 8points POST #84 "My cat loves me so much that sometimes he stares at me with that look of love that’s almost creepy." — Debra DiGiovanni Report 8points POST #85 How many cats can you put into an empty box?
Only one. After that, the box isn’t empty. Report 8points POST #86 Why was the cat so agitated?
He was in a bad mewd. Report 8points POST See Also on Bored Panda 30 Of The Most Hectic Homes As Shared On 'The Broke Agent' Instagram Account Bride Doesn't Include Wedding Dinner Price In Her Wedding Invites, Is Surprised To See Many Guests Canceling On Her After They Find Out #87 Did you hear about the cat who drank five bowls of water?
He set a new lap record. Report 8points POST #88 Why did the cat wear a fancy dress?
She was feline fine! Report 7points POST #89 What do you call a cat who lives in an igloo?
An eskimew! Report 7points POST #90 What do cats use to make coffee?
A purr-colator! Report 7points POST #91 In what kind of weather is a vet the busiest?
When it's raining cats and dogs! Report 7points POST #92 What do you call a cat wearing shoes?
A puss in boots! Report 7points POST #93 What's a cat's favorite subject in school?
Hisss-tory! Report 7points POST #94 What types of cats purr the best?
Purrr-sians! Report 7points POST #95 What's a cat's favorite TV show?
Claw and Order. Report 7points POST #96 What's a cat's favorite cereal?
Mice crispies. Report 7points POST See Also on Bored Panda I Used AI To See What These 23 Popular Cartoon Characters Would Look Like In Real Life 30 Y.O. Woman Takes DNA Test For Fun Only To Discover Her Long-Term Boyfriend Is Her Full Sibling #97 When cats need to go to the airport, who do they call?
A tabby. Report 7points POST #98 What made the cat upgrade his phone?
He wanted to finally get pawtrait mode. Report 7points POST #99 Why did the kitty get an "A" on their English assignment?
They properly used an independent claws. Report 7points POST #100 Why don't you want to play Monopoly with a cat?
They tend to be cheetahs. Report 7points POST #101 Why are cats bad at making decisions?
They become so purrplexed. Report 7points POST #102 What's a kitten's fave way to shop?
By cat-alogue. Report 7points POST #103 Why was the animal lover so untrustworthy?
She kept letting the cat out of the bag! Report 7points POST #104 What do cats call a nice dinner?
"A fancy feast." Report 7points POST #105 Me: *Sobbing* One minute he loves me and the next he wants nothing to do me!
Therapist: That’s pretty typical cat behaviour. Report 7points POST #106 What did the cat say when he lost all his money?
"I’m paw!" Report 7points POST See Also on Bored Panda "I Just Said Thank You And Left": Man’s Nice Gesture Is Praised After Pizza Hut Driver Got A $20 Tip On A $938 Order Woman Flabbergasted At Thrift Store's Prices, Calls Them Out By Sharing 14 Examples #107 Did you hear about the passenger who had to be escorted off the airplane?
She let the cat out of the bag. Report 7points POST #108 A cat walks into a bar. The bartender says, “What’ll you have?” The cat says, “A shot of whiskey.” The bartender pours the cat his drink. Slowly, the cat pushes the shot off the bar... immediately demanding, “ANOTHER!!” Report 7points POST #109 What do you call a fluffy male cat asleep on a bed?
A Himalayan. Report 7points POST #110 How do you know a cat is agitated?
He's having a hissy fit! Report 6points POST billie wright billie wright Community Member • points posts comments upvotes FollowUnfollow 1 month ago Good one 0 0points reply #111 What do baby cats always wear?
Diapurrs! Report 6points POST #112 What title does a cat go by in the kitchen?
"The Whisker." Report 6points POST #113 What did the cats do when they realized they had a bad plan?
They decided to (cat)nip it in the bud. Report 6points POST #114 What do cats quote from the movie Bridesmaids?
"Help me, I'm paw!" Report 6points POST #115 Why are kittens actually excellent bosses?
They have great littership. Report 6points POST #116 What is a cat’s way of keeping law and order?
Claw Enforcement. Report 6points POST See Also on Bored Panda 50 Parents Having A Pretty Miserable Day Photoshop Troll Who Takes Photo Requests Too Literally Strikes Again, And The Result Is Hilarious (17 Pics) #117 Did you hear about the cat that climbed the Himalayas?
She was a sher-paw. Report 6points POST #118 What do you get when you cross a chick with an alley cat?
A peeping tom. Report 6points POST #119 My cat told a joke today but I didn’t laugh.
He took it purr-sondal. Report 6points POST #120 Someone made a joke about my three-legged cat.
Major faux paw. Report 6points POST #121 What's the Cheshire Cat's favorite drink?
Evaporated milk. Report 6points POST #122 How do cats stop crimes?
They call claw enforcement! Report 5points POST #123 Why did the teenage cat call her parents when she found an apartment she liked?
She needed them to (cali)co-sign her lease. Report 5points POST #124 What did the mom cat say about her intuition?
"I just had a strong feline." Report 5points POST #125 What's a cat's favorite sport?
Hair ball. Report 5points POST #126 Why was the cat so small?
Because it only ate condensed milk! Report 5points POST See Also on Bored Panda 50 People Who Are Having A Terrible Day At Work 30 Mistakes Made By Designers And Architects Who Didn’t Think Of The Person Who’d Be Using Their Designs #127 What do you get if you cross a tiger with a snowman?
Frostbite! Report 5points POST #128 What did the cat say after hearing a funny joke?
Lmao. Report 5points POST #129 What do cats eat for breakfast?
Mice Krispies! Report 4points POST Anyone can write on Bored Panda. Start writing! Follow Bored Panda on Google News! Follow us on Flipboard.com/@boredpanda! Add Your Answer! Not your original work? Add source Publish Change image Upload Photo Ooops! Your image is too large, maximum file size is 8 MB. Upload Upload Edit Image Error occurred when generating embed. Please check link and try again. Render conversation
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Title Update Larysa Perih Larysa Perih Author, BoredPanda staff Larysa is a list curator at Bored Panda. She loves hiking and spending time in the mountains. Huge fan of "Friends". Read more » Justė Kairytė - Barkauskienė Justė Kairytė - Barkauskienė Writer, BoredPanda staff Justė is a copywriter here at Bored Panda, and though her studies at the Veterinary Academy seemingly have nothing to do with writing, the passion for animals and nature helps in creating the most interesting and engaging posts. She also works with Search Engine Optimization, so you could find Bored Panda's articles easier.
Justė's not only an avid equestrian, but she's also a walking encyclopedia. Ask her anything! Read more » Show All Contributors Get the latest inspiring stories via our awesome iOS app! Download Bored Panda app! 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