Should You Cut Ties With Unvaccinated Service Providers?
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Get instant access to members-only products and hundreds of discounts, a free second membership, and a subscription to AARP the Magazine. Rosenberg, 66, got two shots early this year as well as a recent booster. She hoped that the housekeeper who had come to her Austin, Texas, home every other week for almost 12 years would do the same. “It was hard because I was comfortable with her. She was so honest and never missed a day and was very easy to work with … so I put up with her not wanting to be vaccinated,” Rosenberg says. “But it got to be when delta became so prevalent, that was the pushing point.” Rosenberg isn’t alone in feeling forced into a decision she never imagined making. The coronavirus has polarized the populace, over masks and vaccinations. The delta variant has magnified the issue, forcing some vaccinated older adults to dissolve long-standing professional relationships with hairstylists, house cleaners and others. “This pandemic and COVID-19 really turned relationships upside down — whether it’s personal or professional relationships,” says Argie Allen-Wilson, a business relationship expert and therapist in Philadelphia. “This is a new dimension of relationships we haven’t dealt with before.”
Rosenberg says she tried a few times to convince her cleaning lady to get vaccinated, but “she told me she didn’t trust it.” The last time Rosenberg raised the issue, delta was at its peak. Her housekeeper had just finished cleaning when Rosenberg asked again her if she planned to get vaccinated. “She said ‘No, I don’t think they know enough about it. It hasn’t been researched enough and I’m not going to do it,’” Rosenberg says. She then inquired about the cleaning woman’s husband and his vaccination status. “And she said, ‘He’s not vaccinated either.’” Entertainment $3 off popcorn and soft drink combos See more Entertainment offers > “This is a question about what level of risk you want to take and what’s the knowledgeable decision about what you consider to be life and death,” Allen-Wilson says. Sometimes the decision to break up can be just as difficult as having conversations about the vaccine, says Monica Guzman, an executive coach and organizational development expert in Powder Springs, Georgia, near Atlanta. People who consider distancing themselves from those who are unvaccinated “have to understand they have the right — and even the obligation — to protect themselves and their families,” Guzman says. “Being assertive and establishing boundaries with people” is OK to do. That’s how Keith Buresh, 60, sees it. A lighting designer from Dallas whose parents are in their 90s, Buresh says having to break up with the woman who has cut his hair for almost five years “was annoying, but it wasn’t difficult.” “I cannot put myself willingly in harm’s way or at risk for no reason,” he says, explaining that the events and companies he works with require vaccinated workers. “I asked her in June when I saw her whether she got the vaccine as there were not any medical issues for her … and she said, ‘I haven’t.’ I told her ‘I’m going to ask you next time,’” he says. “It’s critical to me that I go to somebody vaccinated.” Buresh texted the stylist in early October and she texted back that “she’s on the fence about it and has not gotten it.” He responded: “Too many people in my life are at risk and I cannot get a breakthrough” case. She never replied, he says, and he never went back.
Are You Breaking Up With the Unvaccinated
Some older adults have severed relationships with service providers who won t get the shot
BakiBG/Getty Images It took Elyse Rosenberg months to break up with her cleaning lady. Concerns about made her do it, especially because her grandsons, who are often at her house, had been too young to be vaccinated.Get instant access to members-only products and hundreds of discounts, a free second membership, and a subscription to AARP the Magazine. Rosenberg, 66, got two shots early this year as well as a recent booster. She hoped that the housekeeper who had come to her Austin, Texas, home every other week for almost 12 years would do the same. “It was hard because I was comfortable with her. She was so honest and never missed a day and was very easy to work with … so I put up with her not wanting to be vaccinated,” Rosenberg says. “But it got to be when delta became so prevalent, that was the pushing point.” Rosenberg isn’t alone in feeling forced into a decision she never imagined making. The coronavirus has polarized the populace, over masks and vaccinations. The delta variant has magnified the issue, forcing some vaccinated older adults to dissolve long-standing professional relationships with hairstylists, house cleaners and others. “This pandemic and COVID-19 really turned relationships upside down — whether it’s personal or professional relationships,” says Argie Allen-Wilson, a business relationship expert and therapist in Philadelphia. “This is a new dimension of relationships we haven’t dealt with before.”
No vaccination No business
Rosenberg’s routine includes weekly after-school pickups for her grandsons, who are in kindergarten and second grade. The boys often spend the night at her home. Before Rosenberg was vaccinated “they weren’t allowed in my house andRosenberg says she tried a few times to convince her cleaning lady to get vaccinated, but “she told me she didn’t trust it.” The last time Rosenberg raised the issue, delta was at its peak. Her housekeeper had just finished cleaning when Rosenberg asked again her if she planned to get vaccinated. “She said ‘No, I don’t think they know enough about it. It hasn’t been researched enough and I’m not going to do it,’” Rosenberg says. She then inquired about the cleaning woman’s husband and his vaccination status. “And she said, ‘He’s not vaccinated either.’” Entertainment $3 off popcorn and soft drink combos See more Entertainment offers > “This is a question about what level of risk you want to take and what’s the knowledgeable decision about what you consider to be life and death,” Allen-Wilson says. Sometimes the decision to break up can be just as difficult as having conversations about the vaccine, says Monica Guzman, an executive coach and organizational development expert in Powder Springs, Georgia, near Atlanta. People who consider distancing themselves from those who are unvaccinated “have to understand they have the right — and even the obligation — to protect themselves and their families,” Guzman says. “Being assertive and establishing boundaries with people” is OK to do. That’s how Keith Buresh, 60, sees it. A lighting designer from Dallas whose parents are in their 90s, Buresh says having to break up with the woman who has cut his hair for almost five years “was annoying, but it wasn’t difficult.” “I cannot put myself willingly in harm’s way or at risk for no reason,” he says, explaining that the events and companies he works with require vaccinated workers. “I asked her in June when I saw her whether she got the vaccine as there were not any medical issues for her … and she said, ‘I haven’t.’ I told her ‘I’m going to ask you next time,’” he says. “It’s critical to me that I go to somebody vaccinated.” Buresh texted the stylist in early October and she texted back that “she’s on the fence about it and has not gotten it.” He responded: “Too many people in my life are at risk and I cannot get a breakthrough” case. She never replied, he says, and he never went back.