5 Ways to Sharpen Your Social Skills After Isolation Javascript must be enabled to use this site. Please enable Javascript in your browser and try again. × Search search POPULAR SEARCHES SUGGESTED LINKS Join AARP for just $9 per year when you sign up for a 5-year term. Get instant access to members-only products and hundreds of discounts, a free second membership, and a subscription to AARP the Magazine. Leaving AARP.org Website You are now leaving AARP.org and going to a website that is not operated by AARP. A different privacy policy and terms of service will apply.

5 Ways to Sharpen Your Social Skills After Isolation

It may feel exhausting awkward or stressful to socialize the way you did pre-pandemic

Getty Images As the number of people who receive the , Tami Hackbarth knows the calls will start coming in: invitations from friends who want to meet for dinner, go to the movies or see live concerts. But to Hackbarth, after months of limiting her social interaction, the idea of that increased interaction causes anxiety. Get instant access to members-only products and hundreds of discounts, a free second membership, and a subscription to AARP the Magazine. "There's an expectation that we're going to do things inside again,” says Hackbarth, 51, of Sacramento, California. “I break into a sweat thinking about it.” Though medical officials now say it's , and many will feel more confident dining out or reconnecting with family and friends, more than a year of quarantine and social distancing has taken its toll. Spending time in social situations may not be as simple as penciling a date into the calendar. Stepping back out into the social whirl may feel unfamiliar and uncomfortable — even if it's something that once felt natural. "COVID has really disrupted the way that we interact with others … and there's a strain on social networks [and] relationships,” says Matthew Lee Smith, codirector of the Center for Population Health and Aging at Texas A&M University. “When we get to a situation where [things] are starting to open … the anxiety kicks in … and the question becomes: Is the risk [of going out socially] worth the benefit?"

Embrace the awkwardness

During the height of the pandemic, many people experienced more isolation and loneliness than ever before. Social circles contracted, and daily conversations — with friends, acquaintances and strangers — were often limited. A study by AARP Foundation and the United Health Foundation, for example, noted that for up to three months. As people reconnect, conversations might be stilted. People might forget to make eye contact or feel anxious about being around a group of vaccinated people despite assurances that it . Entertainment $3 off popcorn and soft drink combos See more Entertainment offers > "I'm OK telling people that ... I'm not ready yet,” she says. Lockdowns have changed social networks and, in some cases, strained relationships. Researchers at University College London found that 22 percent of adults during the pandemic — which might create a barrier when it comes to reaching out. "Coming out of the pandemic, our interactions are going to be more strained,” says Timothy Levine, chair and distinguished professor of communication at the University of Alabama at Birmingham. “It'll feel a little awkward at first, but it will become familiar pretty quickly.” Tami Hackbarth plans to start socializing slowly. Courtesy Tami Hackbarth Rather than continuing to isolate once it's safe to gather, Levine suggests being honest about your needs. It's OK to tell friends that you're only getting together one-on-one, outdoors or if that eases your anxiety about reengaging in social interactions.

Ease into social life

While you might feel excited about getting back out into the world of dinners, celebrations and meet-ups, don't pack your social calendar too soon, warns Aderonke Pederson, M.D., a psychiatrist and instructor at Northwestern University Feinberg School of Medicine. Instead of parties and weekend trips, start with coffee. "There is going to be a temptation to try to snap right back into our normal routines,” she says. “We're not robots; we can't switch back with an on-off switch." AARP NEWSLETTERS %{ newsLetterPromoText }% %{ description }% Subscribe and following social distancing guidelines. The infrequent in-person social interactions coupled with texting and lots of Zoom gatherings helped Apte combat loneliness and stay in touch with friends, but she admits, “A few friends fell off the radar and it was — and continues to be — difficult.” Although Apte compares the return to pre-pandemic social interactions with “being told to jump from a fast-moving train without any safety net,” she is looking forward to seeing loved ones again — but she's not rushing to make plans. “It definitely feels daunting to go back to activities as normal,” she says. “Trying to figure out the new rules is going to be hard, and I hope my friends patiently wait for me on the other side."

br What to Say When You re Vaccinated and Able to Socialize

Etiquette expert Elaine Swann gives advice to vaccinated individuals on how to approach social gatherings in both a safe and comfortable way.

5 Tips for Successful Social Interactions br

1. Communicate Before making plans with a friend, ask about their comfort level with social gatherings: Are they up for a daylong event with a group of friends, or would they prefer to ease in to social interactions with a shorter, one-on-one outing? "There is a lot of social anxiety that goes along with reentry [and] communication is key,” Smith says. “Ask questions, respect people's answers … and know what you want yourself and be able to convey that to others." 2. Don't shy away from awkward moments You reach out for a hug; your friend steps back. There are lots of pauses in the conversation during lunch. Your social skills may be little rusty after a year of quarantine, and initial interactions might not be smooth, Levine says. Don't be so embarrassed by an awkward encounter that you are afraid to try again. If you were talking on top of someone else, forgot to make eye contact or ran out of things to say, remember that it takes practice to get your social mojo back. And if there's a pause in conversation, remember to ask questions about the other person's life and practice your listening skills. That's always a good way to keep the chatter going. 3. Extend grace to others On the flip side, if you meet up with a friend you haven't seen in a while and the conversation seems one-sided and their interactions aren't as effortless as your remember, don't judge harshly. Give people a pass at first. "For a lot of us, acclimation will be quick,” Levine says. “Until then, offer people a little more grace." 4. Listen to your body The pandemic has taken its toll on mental and physical health. Social isolation is linked to an increased risk of heart disease, stroke, dementia, depression and early death from all causes in older adults — and communities of color are at higher risk, according to AARP research. If you're feeling unwell, find social interactions especially stressful, or notice changes in mood or behavior, make an appointment with your doctor. 5. Don't give up When a social interaction doesn't go well, don't shred your social calendar and retreat into isolation. Realize that for many people, that social muscle is rusty. “We have to normalize that no one is doing OK from the pandemic,” Smith says. “It's courageous to try again." More on home-family AARP NEWSLETTERS %{ newsLetterPromoText }% %{ description }% Subscribe AARP VALUE & MEMBER BENEFITS See more Health & Wellness offers > See more Flights & Vacation Packages offers > See more Finances offers > See more Health & Wellness offers > SAVE MONEY WITH THESE LIMITED-TIME OFFERS