28 Tweets That Will Never Ever Not Be FunnySkip To ContentHomepageSign InSearch BuzzFeedSearch BuzzFeedlol Badge Feedwin Badge Feedtrending Badge FeedCalifornia residents can opt out of "sales" of personal data.Do Not Sell My Personal Information 2022 BuzzFeed, Inc PressRSSPrivacyConsent PreferencesUser TermsAd ChoicesHelpContactSitemapPosted on 29 Apr 2017 28 Tweets That Will Never Ever Not Be Funny Funny tweets will outlast us all. by Robin EddsBuzzFeed Staff, UK FacebookPinterestTwitterMailLink 1 Dan Duvall @lazerdoov My girlfriend's been at a baby shower for like 3 hours that baby's gotta be so fucking clean by now what the fuck are they even doing 11:59 PM - 22 Apr 2017 Reply Retweet Favorite 2 lesmondine @lesmondine Someone on Facebook has just discovered the concept of plants. 04:15 PM - 15 Apr 2017 Reply Retweet Favorite 3 Alex Temple @alextemplemusic the two genders 08:42 PM - 21 Apr 2017 Reply Retweet Favorite 4 ashley @ashleyms030 guy: I'm 6'4", homeless, I don't have a car, I'm unemployed, and I've been arrested 6 times me: ....did you say..6… https://t.co/0V7fZNVKGD 01:19 AM - 27 Apr 2017 Reply Retweet Favorite 5 @alex4pt he whomsoever that canst draw the motorola from this carriageway shall be kinge of all post brexit englandde 01:07 PM - 23 Apr 2017 Reply Retweet Favorite 6 justi 7/47 @damontrash in a week its gonna be 9 years since bruno mars was surprised to see pete wentz 10:40 PM - 21 Apr 2017 Reply Retweet Favorite 7 #softmom @tatianawrites how'd he have time to write all those plays then 11:17 PM - 20 Mar 2017 Reply Retweet Favorite 8 Jessie @NicCageMatch Just heard a guy at the dog park tell his dog "NO!" and then more quietly, "We talked about this!" 03:43 PM - 10 Apr 2014 Reply Retweet Favorite 9 Ghost @KillianTrill My ex smoked for the first time today and look what this bitch texted me 03:21 AM - 20 Apr 2017 Reply Retweet Favorite 10 sarah jean @sarahjeanalex favorite part of googlemaps is this man unzipping his cargo pants into cargo shorts at the grand canyon 02:22 AM - 30 Aug 2016 Reply Retweet Favorite 11 George Riggall @GeorgeRiggall Pretty sure these aren't 32" length @ASOS ?? 04:22 PM - 26 May 2016 Reply Retweet Favorite 12 FISH MOM @HotMessSWAG IF U BUMP INTO UR EX WITH HIS NEW GIRL ACT FAKE EXCITED TO MEET HER AND SINCERELY SAY "OMG I RLY LIKE UR PAJAMAS" NO MATTER WHAT SHE WEARING 05:32 PM - 30 May 2016 Reply Retweet Favorite 13 Jacob Gulley @Jacob_Gulley Hi my name is Jacob. I have your 2 large pizzas and I'm here to steal your girl 12:05 AM - 04 Jun 2016 Reply Retweet Favorite 14 THE KID MERO @THEKIDMERO THIS MF EAT SOMEBODY EVERYBODY GONNA BE "IM SHOCKED!! HE WAS SO QUIET REALLY NICE & KEPT TO HIMSELF, HONOR STUDENT" 02:56 PM - 15 Jun 2016 Reply Retweet Favorite 15 D Duh @d_duhwit "Unlock the car Sharon, I love you. We can make this work." 01:56 PM - 21 Jun 2016 Reply Retweet Favorite 16 allie oetken @allieoets our cats had a fight and my parents are trying to make them resolve it lol 06:56 PM - 26 Jun 2016 Reply Retweet Favorite 17 Alex Steinman @AlexSteinman A woman on the subway printed out 15 pages of Facebook posts and is just reading the comments ? 10:35 PM - 06 Jul 2016 Reply Retweet Favorite 18 Charles @CabBish_ i blocked my ex on everything but she some how managed to message me through direct tv 06:54 AM - 14 Jul 2016 Reply Retweet Favorite 19 umami skeleton @Merman_Melville My little sister's pre-language infancy was spent ardently yet fruitlessly trying to describe a spicy meatball 11:28 PM - 23 Jul 2016 Reply Retweet Favorite 20 KieranHD @KieranHD How does she find time for airport security? 04:29 PM - 12 Apr 2017 Reply Retweet Favorite 21 Adam @barnettsufc braggin about havin 4 legs when there's people who only have 1, fucking disgusting 08:27 PM - 10 Aug 2016 Reply Retweet Favorite 22 Jar Jar Bindz @BindzBrain One time my sister scared the shit out of my parents by walking down the stairs like this 09:30 PM - 13 Aug 2016 Reply Retweet Favorite 23 Scritt @scritt_ And this is why I believe I should be the next president of the United States of America. 10:39 PM - 13 Aug 2016 Reply Retweet Favorite 24 Scoots @scootertooter7 How fast was this duck going? 08:34 PM - 02 Sep 2016 Reply Retweet Favorite 25 baby rosalina @_rozap Saw your boyfriend at the natural history museum 02:35 PM - 03 Apr 2017 Reply Retweet Favorite 26 Anna @annaszpalik14 When you ask a 1st grade class to write letters to people in a nursing home... 12:55 AM - 10 Sep 2016 Reply Retweet Favorite 27 jack @kysbaker did shrek not wear this 10:08 PM - 11 Sep 2016 Reply Retweet Favorite 28 blaria. @Keelectric_Lady "I actually invented Lemonade so it should be free." 02:52 AM - 27 Apr 2017 Reply Retweet Favorite Share This ArticleFacebook PinterestTwitterMailLink BuzzFeed DailyKeep up with the latest daily buzz with the BuzzFeed Daily newsletter!This site is protected by reCAPTCHA and the Google Privacy Policy and Terms of Service apply.