LIZ JONES'S DIARY: In which I argue with the new man – YOU Magazine Fashion Beauty Celebrity Health Life Relationships Horoscopes Food Interiors Travel Sign in Welcome!Log into your account Forgot your password? Password recovery Recover your password Search Sign in Welcome! Log into your account Forgot your password? Get help Password recovery Recover your password A password will be e-mailed to you. YOU Magazine Fashion Beauty Celebrity Health Life Relationships Horoscopes Food Interiors Travel Home Life Liz Jones LIZ JONES’ S DIARY In which I argue with the new man By You Magazine - September 20, 2020 My week. Tuesday: extreme wax, hair dye, pedicure. Wednesday: lunch with the mysterious P. Thursday: dinner with the mysterious P. Friday: boyfriend-binning barney. There. Nice! Must be the shortest relationship in history! Shall I expand? Abbey Lossing at handsomefrank.com As you may recall from last week’s missive, at our lunch P gave me a wallet, a silk scarf and two other items I was unable to reveal, as you would all be able to guess his brand. Even as I drove away, he was texting to invite me for champagne at his hotel in Darlington that evening, or on a dog walk the next day. Reader, I chose champagne, but at a more neutral hotel near me, ie, one that didn’t house his pants upstairs. Dinner was promising, with no awkward gaps. I regaled him with stories from my award-winning career: Bosnia, a refugee camp in Somalia, an earthquake in Pakistan, dinner with Donatella Versace. ‘Oh,’ he said. ‘I thought you just wrote about fashion.’ He paid, unfurling a wad of notes. He walked me to my car and got a mouthful of hair for assuming I’m lightweight. Even when a fashion editor I took it to the next level, exposing the fact Philip Green asked for his Topshop Unique trench back when I gave him a bad review. And then, on Friday afternoon, moments after my weekly podcast went live, I got this: ‘Noooo! Liz!! If you talk about a tiny coin purse how does that make me look? You could have mentioned it was a gift set. xx’ ‘I have no idea what you mean.’ ‘My hearing hasn’t gone. It looks like that was all I got you. I am honestly not mean.’ I’m afraid I lost it. ‘If a man gave me a cross-body bag on our first lunch, that is over the top. We said on the podcast the wallet is lovely. I can’t have this complaining about what I write or talk about: it’s just too stressful. In my column I say it’s a wallet and a scarf, and that if I were to mention anything else people would clock it’s you. But if you are going to be sensitive and not treat my work for what it is, which is a job, we should end this now. Sorry if you are upset but get over yourself. Who cares?’ ‘You’re right. A strange reaction from me; you’ve been nothing but nice to and about me. My judgment is usually better than that, I promise. And I don’t care what people think. Sorry, Liz. I’m bound to make mistakes, but I won’t make that one again. Xx’ Me: ‘I can’t have another stressful, clingy man in my life who thinks it is all about him.’ ‘I only listened to the podcast as I wanted to hear your voice.’ How old is he? Twelve? Why are men so arrogant? Why is there no vulnerability, humility, humour? No wonder great male novelists and columnists are as endangered as the white rhino. This new one, like David, has already told me he’s a member of Mensa, sent me photos of leggy blondes he’s dated, and told me he went out with a pop star’s mum for three months. Whereas I’m not ashamed to say my bookshelf is exclusively I Had Three Ponies, A Pony for Sale and Riders From Afar, that I have a Captain Haddock beard, scars from a breast reduction, a face that has been rebuilt and zero money. He then accused my reaction of being extreme! Mine! It’s a shame, as we’d been planning to meet at a hotel in London to have sex. He then kept writing that he misses me, that he’s never met anyone like me. Well, actually, no, you haven’t. And probably never will again. I text Nic: ‘Oh well. I got three columns out of him.’ Oh dear God, no. I realise I’ve just texted P by mistake… RELATED ARTICLESMORE FROM AUTHOR Liz Jones In which I m turfed out on to the street Liz Jones In which I m torn between two men Liz Jones In which I have a birthday date DON' T MISS Fiona Bruce Sometimes I struggle not to cry November 14, 2021 17 beautiful 2021 diaries to help you to look forward to December 4, 2020 Why women leave men for women What’ s fuelling the rise of April 28, 2019 Hollywood veteran Laura Linney on plastic surgery friendship and her stellar July 3, 2017 You can shop the khaki jumpsuit from Holly Willoughby’ s new M& S July 17, 2019 The secrets and lies behind this happy family photo April 11, 2021 It’ s cocktail hour Olly Smith’ s cocktail recipes and Eleanor Maidment s canapé November 14, 2021 BBC One has revealed its Christmas TV schedule and there’ s lots December 2, 2020 YOU Beauty Box August Reviews August 1, 2017 Rome has been named the cheapest major city to visit in August 7, 2019 Popular CategoriesFood2704Life2496Fashion2240Beauty1738Celebrity1261Interiors684 Sign up for YOUMail Thanks for subscribing Please check your email to confirm (If you don't see the email, check the spam box) Fashion Beauty Celebrity Life Food Privacy & Cookies T&C Copyright 2022 - YOU Magazine. 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