Editor's letter 3 November 2019: I'm a working mum, not a monster - YOU Magazine Fashion Beauty Celebrity Health Life Relationships Horoscopes Food Interiors Travel Sign in Welcome!Log into your account Forgot your password? Password recovery Recover your password Search Sign in Welcome! Log into your account Forgot your password? Get help Password recovery Recover your password A password will be e-mailed to you. YOU Magazine Fashion Beauty Celebrity Health Life Relationships Horoscopes Food Interiors Travel Home Life Editor’ s letter I’ m a working mum not a monster By You Magazine - November 3, 2019 Guilt: it has such immense power over our lives, doesn’t it? Especially women. I think it has a lot to do with why we end up in situations like our cover star Kirsty Gallacher. In the face of a painful, blindsiding divorce, the TV sports presenter threw herself on to an exhausting treadmill of trying to hold it all together for the children, while still plastering on that on-screen smile for her day job, then adding a gig on that little show called Strictly to the pile. That pursuit of perfection, of seamless plate-spinning and obliging all expectations, and not daring to show a hint of weakness or strain, caught up with her and took a hefty toll. It made me think of the countless times I’ve had the sense that whatever I’m doing, I’m doing it all wrong. And if you’re a woman reading this, I’ll bet my right arm you know exactly what I’m talking about. It’s always there, isn’t it, in the pit of our guts: the sinking feeling that in some way, or in many ways, we’re falling short. In my case, I am a working mother, which for large swathes of society is an open and shut case on doing life all wrong. If I ever have a careless moment where I forget that, I only have to look at the overflowing laundry basket to know I’m really dropping the ball. But also, luckily (and please do sense the nuclear level sarcasm here) my job provides me with a daily glut of emails to put me straight. Seriously, every day, a PR firm emails me with a new survey detailing the anguish and guilt of working mothers across the country. (I suspect surveys about dad guilt must exist, but I am yet to be sent any.) I don’t feel guilty about being a working mother. Not one little bit. But this onslaught of information tells me I’m in the minority and so I end up feeling guilty about not feeling guilty! So I must be a monster. I tweeted about yet another of these surveys the other day and was soon chatting with hundreds of mothers – working mums, mums who run business and households simultaneously, stay-at-home mums who never get so much as a peaceful loo break – who all feel as though they’re doing something wrong. Plenty mentioned guilt about not returning to work. Some believed what they’ve read, that being a stay-at-home mum makes them an unambitious role model for their children. I know, I know – the child-free women reading this will think I’ve forgotten you. But whether you’re child-free by choice or otherwise, don’t you worry, we all know there’s plenty of judgment – of every woman’s personal situation – to go around. When guilt comes as standard conditioning, it renders us struggling silently – and inevitably failing – to be perfect. So I’m going to work extra hard to erase the guilt I feel about not feeling guilty and I urge you to do the same. Editor’ s picks A few things I’m coveting this week My new weekend uniform. Shirt, £29.90, JW Anderson x uniqlo.com Love the pop of green against the white. Bag, £305, bimbaylola.com Why don’t we wear more pink with red? Jacket, £290, and trousers, £270, Current/Elliott, harveynichols.com RELATED ARTICLESMORE FROM AUTHOR Everything we know about The Crown season 5 Aldi s exercise equipment is on sale with up to 50% off The best Halloween events for 2022 across the UK Popular in Life The You magazine team reveal their New Year s resolutions December 31, 2021 Susannah Taylor The TLC tools your body will love January 23, 2022 How to stop living in fear February 6, 2022 Susannah Taylor My pick of the fittest leggings February 27, 2022 Women’ s Prize for Fiction 2022 winner announced June 17, 2022 These BBC dramas are returning for a second series June 30, 2022 Susannah Taylor gives the lowdown on nature s little helper – CBD April 17, 2022 The baby names that are banned across the world April 27, 2022 The Queen has released her own emojis May 26, 2022 Sally Brompton horoscopes 27th June-3rd July 2022 June 26, 2022 Popular CategoriesFood2704Life2496Fashion2240Beauty1738Celebrity1261Interiors684 Sign up for YOUMail Thanks for subscribing Please check your email to confirm (If you don't see the email, check the spam box) Fashion Beauty Celebrity Life Food Privacy & Cookies T&C Copyright 2022 - YOU Magazine. All Rights Reserved