Parents Supporting Children Through Grief
Parents Supporting Children Through Grief Health ConditionsFeaturedBreast CancerIBD MigraineMultiple Sclerosis (MS)Rheumatoid ArthritisType 2 DiabetesSponsored TopicsArticlesAcid RefluxADHDAllergiesAlzheimer's & DementiaBipolar DisorderCancerCrohn's DiseaseChronic PainCold & FluCOPDDepressionFibromyalgiaHeart DiseaseHigh CholesterolHIVHypertensionIPFOsteoarthritisPsoriasisSkin Disorders and CareSTDsDiscoverWellness TopicsNutritionFitnessSkin CareSexual HealthWomen's HealthMental HealthSleepOriginal SeriesFresh Food FastDiagnosis DiariesYou’re Not AlonePresent TenseVideo SeriesYouth in FocusHealthy HarvestNo More SilenceFuture of HealthPlanHealth ChallengesMindful EatingSugar SavvyMove Your BodyGut HealthMood FoodsAlign Your SpineFind CarePrimary CareMental HealthOB-GYNDermatologistsNeurologistsCardiologistsOrthopedistsLifestyle QuizzesWeight ManagementAm I Depressed? A Quiz for TeensAre You a Workaholic?How Well Do You Sleep?Tools & ResourcesHealth NewsFind a DietFind Healthy SnacksDrugs A-ZHealth A-ZConnectFind Your Bezzy CommunityBreast CancerInflammatory Bowel DiseasePsoriatic ArthritisMigraineMultiple SclerosisPsoriasisFollow us on social mediaShopProducts by ConditionInsomniaStress ReliefBack PainNeck PainSleep ApneaHot SleepersAllergiesPain ReliefProduct ReviewsVitamins & SupplementsSleepMental HealthNutritionAt-Home TestingCBDMen’s HealthWomen’s HealthHealth ConditionsDiscoverPlanConnectShopSubscribe
American Psychological Association. (2022). Police violence towards minorities remains a significant source of stress.
apa.org/news/press/releases/stress/2020/police-violence-detailCenters for Disease Control and Prevention. (2022). Fact about suicide. https://www.cdc.gov/suicide/facts/index.html
Center for Substance Abuse Treatment. (2014). Understanding the impact of trauma.
ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/books/NBK207191/John Hopkins Medicine. (2010). Children who lose a parent to suicide more likely to die the same way.
hopkinsmedicine.org/news/media/releases/children_who_lose_a_parent_to_suicide_more_likely_to_die_the_same_wayRoberson-Moore, T. (2022). Personal interview.
Suicide Prevention Resource Center. (n.d.). Black populations.
sprc.org/scope/racial-ethnic-disparities/black-populationsWilliams DR. (2018). Stress and the mental health of populations of color: Advancing our understanding of race-related stressors.
ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC6532404/Woods VD, et al. (2012). WE AIN'T CRAZY! Just coping with a crazy system pathways into the black population for eliminating mental health disparities.
cpehn.org/assets/uploads/2021/05/African_Am_CRDP_Pop_Rept_FINAL2012.pdfOur experts continually monitor the health and wellness space, and we update our articles when new information becomes available. Current Version Oct 14, 2022 By Taneia Surles Edited By Taneasha White Copy Edited By Copy Editors Share this articleBy Taneia Surles on October 14, 2022 — Fact checked by Jennifer Chesak
Supporting a Child Whose Lost a Parent to Suicide
By Taneia Surles on October 14, 2022 — Fact checked by Jennifer ChesakAs Suicide Prevention Month passes, we discuss the importance of discussing the support needed for families of color that have endured loss to suicide. Share on PinterestMaskot/Getty ImagesIn July 2022, my father sat inside his vehicle in my grandparents’ driveway and took his life. While he had a history of mental illness, his death was unexpected and took our family through one of the darkest moments we’ve ever experienced. I’ve slowly recovered from his untimely passing by prioritizing my mental health and doing what I love, like writing and spending time with my pets. However, for my younger brother who’s in the beginning of his teenage years, coping with our father’s death may be different. While he seems okay, it’s challenging to understand what’s going on in his adolescent mind. My father’s death has taken a mental and physical toll on my mother. I can only imagine how hard it must be to not only take care of herself, but to be there for my brother and me during this rough time. As Suicide Prevention Month in September came and went, I was left wondering: How can parents from communities of color aid their children in their grief?Mental health in marginalized communities
BIPOC communities face ongoing issues of racial discrimination, contributing to an increase in stress and a decline in overall mental health. This is especially true for the Black community, particularly in terms of navigating ongoing police brutality and violence, according to the American Psychological Association (APA). “It is important to understand that due to the institutionalized beliefs and attitudes regarding race, Toya Roberson-Moore, M.D. and Child and Adolescent Psychiatrist at Pathlight Mood & Anxiety Center in Chicago said. “African-Americans, Native Americans and other People of Color are still dealing with trauma and discrimination every day. These are factors that greatly impact the mental health of this marginalized population.”Suicidality in the Black Community
Suicide remains a leading cause of death for adults in the US, and the second-leading cause of death for people between the ages of 10 and 34. According to the Suicide Prevention Resource Center, suicide and suicidal ideation in the Black community is especially prevalent:Suicide rates for Black or African Americans rise starting at age 15 and decline after age 44.The age range with the highest suicide rates amongst Black or African Americans between 2011 to 2020 was 25-34 years old (11.4%). The suicide rate for Black or African males is three times than that of their Black or African female counterparts. 3.4% of Black or African Americans had past-year suicidal thoughts.Mental Health Stigma in BIPOC Communities
Despite these rates, there’s ongoing stigma associated with mental illness, making understanding its impact and it can contribute to suicide rates in marginalized communities is essential. In recent years, movies, TV shows, and social media have gotten more comfortable discussing the issue of mental health stigma. For many of us within BIPOC communities, however, the problem persists. Despite the prevalence of stress and mental illness within the Black community, people feel shame for their symptoms and out of having conversations or seeking mental health resources. This creates a cycle this can lead to a lack of treatment, ultimately contributing to rates of suicide.The effects of parent suicide on their children
There are both potential immediate and long-term effects on children who have lost a parent to suicide. According to Johns Hopkins Medicine, children who’ve lost a parent to suicide are three times more likely to die by suicide compared to children with living parents. However, once a child reaches adulthood, the suicide attempts or completion rate significantly decreases, according to Hopkins. This makes prevention methods essential when it comes to addressing a child’s needs after they’ve experienced the traumatic event of their parent’s passing. Each child is different, but there are some warning signs that a parent or caring adult can be aware of, including feelings of anger, sadness, and anxiety. Other signs of trauma include:Lack of appetiteIrritability Isolation Poor sleeping habitsReduced academic performance Without addressing those emotions early on, childhood trauma has the potential to can lead to a path of mental illnesses like depression, PTSD, and suicidal ideation.How to support a child grieving from a parent s passing
Every child processes death differently. When it comes to the death of a parent, particularly from suicide, the grieving period can become especially challenging. Experts suggest the following to support your family through an unexpected loss:Parents Must Identify Their Own Needs
When it comes to trauma-inducing incidents like suicide, it’s imperative that parents acknowledge their own needs and not just tend to their children. “As parents, we can best help our children when we help ourselves … because co-regulation and social referencing play major roles in emotional reactions within the family system, particularly in the face of tragedy …” said Roberson-Moore. It’s okay for your kids to see you emotional or experiencing difficult moments — that’s a normal part of grieving. There’s no right way to experience an unexpected loss, and being real about your emotions may give your kids the room to share and process theirs. If you’re unsure of where to start, some options could include speaking openly with trusted loved ones, writing about your feelings in a journal, or receiving counseling.Start Conversations Actively Listen
In terms of supporting your children, remind yourself that it’s okay not to have all of the answers or to have everything “together.” Spark a conversation with your child about what they’re feeling or what they may need. Remember that you aren’t responsible for what your child is or isn’t feeling — we all handle loss differently. Allow them room to express what that may look like. Sometimes people just want to feel heard or have the room to share what they’re experiencing, and kids are no different. Ultimately, your child needs your love and support during these difficult times, so be an active listener to them and practice not always having a response. They may not be immediately open to sharing, and that’s okay. Let them know that the door is always open.Consider counseling services
Bringing in a mental health professional like a counselor or psychiatrist can provide additional support to assist your child in recovering from the trauma of a parent’s passing. “Establishing care with a mental health professional for assessment and treatment of symptoms is crucial for children who’ve lost a parent to suicide,” said Roberson-Moore. Roberson-Moore adds that, if possible, seek BIPOC mental health professionals that are culturally competent. These professionals are less likely to be discriminatory to minority patients and to provide the support they need during traumatic events like a parent’s passing from suicide. Speak with your child to discuss their preference for individual or family counseling sessions, which can involve you and their siblings if you have other children.Takeaway
Dealing with a loss of a loved one is hard.If you or a loved one are navigating severe depression or suicidal thoughts you can reach out to
Suicide and Crisis Lifeline: 988 (Call or Text)Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 1-800-273-TALK (1-800-273-8255)National Youth Crisis Hotline: 1-800-442-HOPE (1-800-442-4673)The Trevor Lifeline: 1-866-488-7386Youth America Hotline (YAH!): 1-877-YOUTHLINE (1-877-968-8454)Youth Crisis Hotline: 1-800-HIT-HOME (1-800-448-4663) When a family member passes from suicide, it adds additional trauma that can be difficult to recover. For children, the experience can draw up a mixture of feelings like anger and sadness. As a parent, addressing these potential mental health issues is vital, especially for BIPOC communities that often navigate stigma surrounding mental illness. The journey to recovery and mental wellness isn’t simple, but it is achievable. Surround yourself with positive community, and consider what the best options for you and your family may look like. Parents have the heavy task of caring for themselves and their children after a loss. It can be easy to forget, but it’s important not to forego your own needs. In caring for your children, keep the door open for conversation and consider speaking to experts about the proper intervention methods to help you and your child process this untimely death.How we vetted this article
SourcesHistoryHealthline has strict sourcing guidelines and relies on peer-reviewed studies, academic research institutions, and medical associations. We avoid using tertiary references. You can learn more about how we ensure our content is accurate and current by reading our editorial policy.American Foundation for Suicide Prevention. (2022). Suicide rates in the united states. https://afsp.org/suicide-statistics/American Psychological Association. (2022). Police violence towards minorities remains a significant source of stress.
apa.org/news/press/releases/stress/2020/police-violence-detailCenters for Disease Control and Prevention. (2022). Fact about suicide. https://www.cdc.gov/suicide/facts/index.html
Center for Substance Abuse Treatment. (2014). Understanding the impact of trauma.
ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/books/NBK207191/John Hopkins Medicine. (2010). Children who lose a parent to suicide more likely to die the same way.
hopkinsmedicine.org/news/media/releases/children_who_lose_a_parent_to_suicide_more_likely_to_die_the_same_wayRoberson-Moore, T. (2022). Personal interview.
Suicide Prevention Resource Center. (n.d.). Black populations.
sprc.org/scope/racial-ethnic-disparities/black-populationsWilliams DR. (2018). Stress and the mental health of populations of color: Advancing our understanding of race-related stressors.
ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC6532404/Woods VD, et al. (2012). WE AIN'T CRAZY! Just coping with a crazy system pathways into the black population for eliminating mental health disparities.
cpehn.org/assets/uploads/2021/05/African_Am_CRDP_Pop_Rept_FINAL2012.pdfOur experts continually monitor the health and wellness space, and we update our articles when new information becomes available. Current Version Oct 14, 2022 By Taneia Surles Edited By Taneasha White Copy Edited By Copy Editors Share this articleBy Taneia Surles on October 14, 2022 — Fact checked by Jennifer Chesak